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Posted by Hannah Rae on Jan 18, 2011 in Life in the Stubborn house Friday will be my last day teaching Kindergarten and Preschool. For now. I’m sad. I will miss my 4, 5, and 6 year-olds. Lot. But I know it’s what is necessary. It comes not out of the want to stop teaching, but the need to better meet Jeremiah’s needs. The school he is attending, the one I am currently teaching at, has recently realized the tip of the trauma that Jeremiah has gone through and what behaviors that trauma produces. They feel ill-equipped to say the least. The following is an excerpt of a conversation with a friend of mine after he asked why the school felt they couldn’t meet Miah’s needs… Question: What do you think they might need to be equipped for Jeremiah? Answer: People. I suggested in all seriousness that they take you on as a school social worker. They just don’t have the budget right now. Grrrr! In my conversations with Mrs. V., I explained to her that all Jeremiah needs is a place with nothing breakable to cool off until he comes to his senses. He is not dangerous. He is not going to murder anyone. All he needs is a place where he is not going to receive negative attention. The response: We don’t have anyone who could supervise him. Great answer. GET SOMEONE! Sorry, venting. The other issue is that he is working at a 2nd grade level, but can’t be trusted to be with the 2nd graders, even if he would tolerate that, because he was caught showing some inappropriate drawings to classmates. The only difference between him and multiple other boys in the 4th and 5th grade classes is that he doesn’t have the sense to not show those pictures around. So again, basically they are overwhelmed because they have never dealt with a child like Jeremiah before. But they will. Especially if they are trying to operate as a ministry to families that need a Christian education for their kids, instead of a pretty people’s club. There’s that darn soap box again. Thank you for understanding. For wanting to understand. Blessings! Hannah So there’s the rub. It sucks in a lot of ways, but I am also excited at the prospect of homeschooling Jeremiah for this season in his life and helping bring about the healing he so desperately needs. After a year and half or so of concentrated mom-teach time, I am hoping that he might be at the place where he can rejoin his peers in the small school environment again. Or maybe not. And if not, I will be okay with that. We will be okay with that. So now…the homeschooling adventure begins! So yes, I will be picking all your home-schooling-mama brains. Blessings! Hannah Leave a comment | | Tags: Adoption, behavior challenges, Being set apart, Education Everywhere, parenting, RAD, the hard stuff, The SAHM Adventure Posted by Hannah Rae on Jun 26, 2010 in Life in the Stubborn house - I’ve been really blessed to bless some more new mamas recently. I’m getting through baby shower season pretty well, and am really enjoying the friendship with some awesome women. I really love being able to be a part of these little one’s lives, as well as encouraging their parents and offering to babysit whenever, and I mean it! - I have found an unlikely friend in the mom of one of Jeremiah’s teammates. She is 44, also an adoptive mom, and has worked in the social work and child care field for a long time. We chat at the games, ride together whenever possible, and are really enjoying eachother’s “knowing-ness”. She has been very real with me, and I am extremely thankful for that, even if what she has to say is not always easy to hear….aka, wisdom. - I really love my husband. I want him to be happy so badly, and when he’s not, well things just don’t feel right. We have a date night on Friday, and I can’t wait. There is nothing I would rather do than spend time with him. Even after almost 9 years, I still feel like we’re dating….well, almost. - Gabe is on a new med that has less potential for abuse, which is definitely something we wanted to take out of the equation. I am hopeful that he will not have to be dependant on meds as an adult, and this is a good stepping stone. - Jeremiah is really a medical mystery right now. His platelets are low, causing really easy bruising, which is really fun for a clumsy kid in sports. Also, his calcium level is really high, which his doctor says it is caused by his parathyroid gland being overactive. Interestingly enough, a high calcium level can cause digestive issues and mental health/behavioral issues, both of which Miah struggles with. Being in the remote area we are, a hematologist is only available monthly, and the endocrinologist only comes up every three months, so it might be a while before we have answers. Prayers are appreciated. - Gabe’s adoption is being finalized on Monday in our local county’s court. YAY! He is very excited and has invited a bunch of our family and friends to come celebrate with him. We are hoping that Miah will be able to hold it together, cuz it would be a bummer if we had to intervene on Gabe’s big day. - We still don’t have a day for Miah’s finalization. I am hoping to hear from our worker this week, but we are waiting on a signature from downstate. Ah, the infamous signature. - Due to some cues Miah has given us, we are most likely leaving him with our close family friends while we go downstate for court. He has expressed quite clearly that if we take him he would not be able to handle it and WILL make a scene. Basically, he wants us to prove that we will fight for him, and in his mind that means a battle. So we are respecting his feelings and will be leaving him home. I’m sure his caseworker and GAL will be disappointed, but as a good friend told me, I’m the mama, and I’ve got to watch out for my kid first. They are adults. They will get over it. - I’ve got myself on a behavior chart. My goal is to go 2 weeks without losing my temper. It’s been very hard lately with the amped-up behaviors. I did not like who I became the other day, and I fear that I destroyed the progress we had made the day before. Anywho, my goal is that if I can go 2 weeks without losing my temper (which I know very clearly when that happens) I will earn a pampered day off all to myself. So far, 2 days! YAY! 12 to go. - Gabe has had privileges back for 4 days now, and is really struggling today. He has gone a little privilege drunk, and is starting to really push boundaries. He doesn’t like the freedom in a lot of ways but, of coarse, loves it in many ways as well. I’m trying to treat him l like a 17 year old, but it’s very hard when he is acting like a 12 year old. - Both boys are doing really well with their summer studies. Jeremiah is loving Mathletics, and asks to spend time on it every day. He’s lost the website privilege for a couple of days but, thankfully, they have printable workbooks, and he’s been really succeeding with those as well. His teacher also gave me access to a website their classroom uses for reading, social studies, and science, so he is working in each of those subjects on almost a daily basis. - Gabe is working with a family friend who is a very gifted tutor. He is mostly working on Chemistry to get ready for taking it in the fall, and also composition, which is something he really struggles with. His tutor is assigning him documentaries to watch, and then he writes an essay on what he watches. It’s a formula that is working really well. I’ve also ordered some Drive-Thru History episodes that come with teaching materials. They should be here in a couple of days. Exciting! - God is really working on my heart about what holiness and discipline really mean. More on that another time. Blessings! Hannah Leave a comment | | Tags: Adoption, behavior challenges, Being set apart, Education Everywhere, faith, family fun, infertility, marriage, parenting, RAD, The SAHM Adventure Posted by Hannah Rae on May 5, 2010 in Life in the Stubborn house First, some good news. Got an important call from an important State Trooper saying that an important legal matter of Gabe’s was being dropped. YAY! Thank you for all of you who were praying, even when you didn’t know what you were praying about. Jeremiah has his first baseball game tomorrow. YAY! I am beyond excited….for him….and for me. I’m just loving being able to say “That’s my son!” He’s really doing well, and I’m hoping this is something he falls in love with and succeeds at. He needs some succeeding. Unfortunately, we are in horrible need of rain, and it looks like God will be answering our moisture prayers tomorrow night. YUCK! Yay, God for the rain! I’m just hoping it comes the rest of the day, and stops around 5:00. Now. What to do with a certain 17-year-old’s bad attitude. An attitude that has recently earned him 4 extra weeks of restriction. We saw something very similar happen last spring, so we are thinking possible trauma-versary. I’m just hoping that we can reach his heart before this goes too far. And if you are praying, and I hope you are, please be praying that Jeremiah’s subsidy paperwork comes through ASAP. His consent to adoption came through 2 weeks ago, and Gabe’s consent and subsidy came through, like, 6 weeks ago, so we are just waiting on Miah’s. Our adoption worker 3.0 is bugging the worker incessantly, so I’m hoping we hear any day now. Only 3 weeks of school left. Huh? Okay. Gotta figure that out too. Blessings! Hannah Leave a comment | | Tags: Adoption, behavior challenges, Education Everywhere, faith, family fun, parenting, prayer, RAD Posted by Hannah Rae on Feb 10, 2010 in Life in the Stubborn house We will return to the regularly scheduled drama after this short message. Summer is coming soon. Really! It’s almost mid February, which means that March, April, and May are all that stand between me and a 3 month break from school for my boysies. So I am trying to plan ahead to prepare for the extra time and lack of structure that will ensue. Jeremiah is especially anxious about having three whole months off. He hates it when there is 1 day off of school. At all of his former placements, they had year round, in-house school, so he has never experienced summer break before. Sooo…. Mom is trying her best to plan now for how to fill the time with structure and learning to help him and Gabe stay on track academically as well as help Miah feel more at ease with the break. So, (yes, that is how I am starting paragraphs this post) I need help from all my awesome home schooling mom and dad friends out there to help me with resource ideas. Here are the topic areas that I think the boys would most benefit from: Gabe - Algebra 2 - Chemistry or Physics (I have to find out what he is signed up for next year. I can’t remember what the order is.) - English 11, especially focusing on vocabulary, writing skills, and reading comprehension. (This is Gabe’s worst subject, so it will need to be something that is very comprehensive.) - US History (He’s currently failing this class because of….well…laziness, so I really want to grab his attention. I like the Drive Thru History DVD’s, but am curious of any other good history resources out there.) Jeremiah - 4th and 5th grade math (He hasn’t mastered basic math skills yet, such as counting, adding etc…but we are trying to help him work near grade level as well, so any program that has a variety of elementary levels would be helpful. Computer programs would be a good motivation for him as well. - Reading and vocabulary (This is Miah’s hardest subject as well. He reads at about a kindergarten/first grade level, and comprehension is very difficult, so any help in this area would rock.) - Science exploration (We will be doing a lot of traveling this summer, so something that will incorporate a lot of exploration would be excellent.) Okay, so that is what we need. We will be going all over the place this summer, from Northern MN, to Chicago, to the Black Hills, maybe even Texas, so my goal is to incorporate learning where ever we go. The lower the cost for the materials the better, but we will pay for quality materials. I feel like I should know more about this by now, but since both of my boys are in public school right now, I’ve lost my motivation to research. HELP! Blessings! Hannah Oh, and let me know if you want to send me a longer message and I will shoot you my e-mail. Leave a comment | | Tags: Education Everywhere, Learning differences, The SAHM Adventure
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Posted by Hannah Rae ar 10 Feabhra, 2010 i Saol sa teach stubborn Beidh muid ar ais chuig an dráma rialta sceidealta tar éis an teachtaireacht ghearr. Samhraidh ag teacht go luath. I ndáiríre! Tá sé beagnach Feabhra lár, rud a chiallaíonn go bhfuil Márta, Aibreán, Bealtaine agus gach a seasamh idir mé agus sos 3 mhí ón scoil do mo boysies. Mar sin, tá mé ag iarraidh a phleanáil amach romhainn chun ullmhú le haghaidh an am breise agus easpa struchtúr a ensue. Jeremiah go háirithe imníoch faoi a bhfuil trí mhí ar fad amach. Fuath sé é nuair a bhíonn 1 lá saor ón scoil. Ag gach a socrúcháin roimhe sin, bhí siad i rith na bliana, in-tí scoil, mar sin tá sé riamh sos an tsamhraidh taithí roimh. Tá Mam ag iarraidh a is fearr chun pleanáil anois le haghaidh conas a líonadh isteach ar an am le struchtúr agus foghlama chun cuidiú leis agus Gabe fanacht ar an rian go hacadúil chomh maith le cuidiú Miah bhraitheann níos mó ar a gcompord leis an sos. Mar sin, (yes, is é sin conas a bhfuil mé ag tosú míreanna an post seo) dhíth orm cuidiú ó mo mam go léir sa bhaile uamhnach scolaíocht agus cairde daidí amach ann chun cabhrú liom le smaointe acmhainní. Seo iad na réimsí ábhar go sílim go mbeadh na buachaillí is mó tairbhe a bhaint as: Gabe - Ailgéabar 2 - Ceimic nó Fisic (tá mé chun a fháil amach cad a bhfuil sé sínithe suas don bhliain seo chugainn. Ní féidir liom cuimhneamh ar cad é an t-ordú.) - Béarla 11, ag díriú go háirithe ar stór focal, scileanna scríbhneoireachta, agus léamhthuiscint. (Tá sé seo faoi réir measa Gabe ar, mar sin beidh sé a bheith rud éigin go bhfuil an-chuimsitheach.) - US Stair (Tá sé ag teip seo faoi láthair aicme mar gheall ar .... maith ... leisce, mar sin ba mhaith liom a grab a aird. Is maith liom an Drive Thru Stair DVDanna, ach táim aisteach ar aon acmhainní stair eile maith amach ann.) Jeremiah - Mata grád 4ú agus 5ú (nach bhfuil máistreacht aige scileanna bunúsacha math fóill, mar shampla comhaireamh, ag cur srl ... ach táimid ag iarraidh chun cuidiú leis an obair in aice le leibhéal grád, chomh maith, ionas go mbeadh aon chlár go bhfuil leibhéil éagsúla bunrang a bheith cabhrach . bheadh cláir ríomhaireachta a spreagadh maith dó chomh maith.) - Léitheoireacht agus foclóir (Tá sé seo faoi réir deacra Miah ar chomh maith. Léann sé ag thart ar leibhéal kindergarten / chéad ghrád, agus tuiscint an-deacair, mar sin bheadh aon chabhair sa réimse seo carraig.) - Eolaíocht taiscéalaíochta (Beidh muid ag déanamh a lán taistil an samhradh seo, mar sin rud éigin a ionchorprú go mbeadh a lán de na taiscéalaíochta a bheith den scoth.) Maith go leor, ionas go bhfuil an méid is gá dúinn. Beidh muid ag dul ar fud na háite an samhradh seo, ó Thuaisceart MN, go Chicago, go dtí an Black Hills, b'fhéidir Texas fiú, mar sin tá mo sprioc a ionchorprú foghlama nuair a bhí riamh a théann muid. An níos ísle ar an costas do na hábhair is fearr, ach beidh muid ag íoc le haghaidh ábhar cáilíochta. Dar liom chóir dom níos mó eolas faoi seo ag anois, ach ós rud é go bhfuil an dá de mo buachaillí i scoil phoiblí ceart anois, tá mé caillte mo spreagadh chun taighde. CABHAIR! Beannachtaí! Hannah Ó, agus in iúl dom más mian leat a sheoladh dom teachtaireacht níos faide agus beidh mé shoot mo r-phost tú. Fág nóta tráchta | | Tags: Oideachas I ngach áit , difríochtaí Foghlama , An Eachtraíochta SAHM Posted by Hannah Rae ar 1 Deireadh Fómhair, 2009 i Saol sa teach stubborn Dea- - Fuarthas dul ar ais a chodladh tar éis dul na buachaillí amach chun na scoile. - Fuair roinnt ama maith cuddly leis an duine hubby. - Bhí cruinniú IEP AWESOME le múinteoirí Jeremiah ar. - Fuarthas chun cuairt a thabhairt lenár oibrí sóisialta uamhnach agus bhraith go hiomlán le tacaíocht agus spreagadh. - Is é ár oibrí sóisialta uamhnach ais amárach a dhéanamh seisiúin chomhairleoireachta 1-ar-1 leis na buachaillí. - Fuarthas a úsáid iontach Lisa ar tástála braite bréag agus roinnt struggles cumhacht mhór a sheachaint sa phróiseas. - D'éirigh le chabhraigh Jeremiah athrú sé suas agus deireadh dearfach a lá a bheith acu. - Aimsíodh amach go bhfuil na renters ar ár teach eile ag dul a úsáid a gcuid airgid cánach le haghaidh íocaíochta síos a cheannach IT!! - Múinte Juji conas a casadh ar ordú, a bhfuil trick síniú ár teaghlaigh le haghaidh ár madraí ... agus anois ar ár parrot freisin. - D'éirigh le chabhraigh Gabe leis an obair bhaile na scoile ard math. Ní maith sin - Gabe nach bhfuil ag caint fós faoi roinnt mothúcháin an-mhór agus / nó na roghanna a bhí sé ag déanamh lately. Na tástálacha braite bréag ag obair, ach tá sé nach bhfuil a oscailt fós ar bun. - Aimsíodh amach go bhfuil Gabe éis teacht ar a m * spás (atá ina mór aon ní ar roinnt cúiseanna mór) lena PSP ag seachaint na rialuithe tuismitheoirí. Ní féidir sé é a dhéanamh anseo sa bhaile mar gheall ar bloic duine hubby sé ar ár líonra, agus mar sin tá sé rochtain ag spotaí te poiblí. - Duine Hubby go raibh a bhaint as an cárta líonra ó PSP Gabe ar, nach bhfuil ann féin dona, ach bhí sé pian i tuckus a bhaint de. Scriúnna i ngach áit! Thar gach, lá an-mhaith! Is mian liom ach bheadh Gabe labhairt. Tá a fhios agam tá sé i pian, ach conas is féidir linn cabhrú leis a cneasaigh más rud é nach mbeidh sé ag caint? Beannachtaí! Hannah Fág nóta tráchta | | Tags: Uchtála , dúshláin iompar , difríochtaí Foghlama , pósadh , tuismitheoireachta , RAD , an critters , An Eachtraíochta SAHM Posted by Hannah Rae ar 8 Meán Fómhair, 2009 i Saol sa teach stubborn Dar liom gur theip orm an chéad lá de tástála scoile. Ní Maith go leor, ar fad é. Fuair mé na buachaillí suas ar an am, cé nach raibh againn a fháil ar ais ón ár turas go dtí mo mam go dtí go an-déanach. Rinne mé dóibh bricfeasta te agus a sheachaint mo is sine iarrachtaí a phiocadh troid thar an bhfuil nó nach raibh sé ag dul a ghlacadh a cógais. Fuair mé na buachaillí ar scoil in am, agus sílim go sheachaint mé fiú Gabe embarrassing ar na céimeanna tosaigh. Fuair mé Jeremiah go dtí an taobh tosaigh ... agus sin an áit a thosaigh an trioblóid. Miah a bhí go maith, ach chuaigh mé isteach an phríomhoide bunrang oifig le deimhin a dhéanamh gach rud go maith agus pulls an príomhoide dom leataobh. Bhreathnaigh sí panicked. Ag breathnú siar, bhí sé de chineál ar humorous go bhféadfadh amháin buachaill beag a dhéanamh le breathnú bean fásta mar sin. "Conas is féidir leat bheith ag súil ach le caith dó i scoil mar seo?" A dúirt sí i nguth an-nach-sásta. Cuireadh isteach ar bunúsach í toisc nach raibh aon chúlra air agus dá bhrí sin ní raibh aon phlean i bhfeidhm. Dúirt mé léi gur thuig mé a frustrachas, ach go raibh sé ach go hoifigiúil chur le linn dhá sheachtain ó shin, agus dá bhrí sin, bhí againn an-beag eolas cúlra oifigiúil a thairiscint dóibh. Bhí mé éigean go fiú in ann a enroll dó i scoil mar go fuair ár chásoibrí ach dúinn a chomhad lena teastas breithe agus taifid imdhíonadh ann in aghaidh na seachtaine ó shin. Thug mé go bunúsach acu ar chúlra garbh, chomh fada agus a fhios agam, agus labhair lena múinteoir chomh maith. Mhothaigh mé chomh neamhullmhaithe. Mar sin, anois tá mé chuardach trí a chomhad níos déine agus fuair sé measúnú feidhme iompraíochta dar dáta Nollaig 08 agus tuarascáil ar dhul chun cinn POA-mhaith dar dáta Aibreán na bliana seo. Táimid dóchasach go mbeidh a chabhróidh. Táimid dóchasach go mbeidh siad a thuiscint go bhfuil siad seo dátaithe agus go bhfuil sé dul chun cinn dochreidte ó shin. Breathe. Uimh ghlaonna éigeandála, agus mar sin go maith. Mar sin, ag iarraidh ar gach moms Super! Tá mé chomh lán de cheisteanna. Cé mhéad is féidir liom a rá leis an scoil? Cé mhéad is féidir liom a roinnt lena múinteoir? Níl mé ag iarraidh iad a fheiceáil ar mo buachaill mar diagnóis. Cad é an t-iarmhéid idir teanntásaí agus comharchumann? Dar liom mé ag snámh i lár an Loch Superior leis an gceann seo. An raibh (Ciallaíonn mé timpeallaithe ag míle agus míle agus míle de uisce, timpeallaithe ag dtonnta is féidir a overtake na báid is mó dóibh siúd de tú talún-ghlas cairde.) Go analaí éigean? Níl a fhios agam. Tá sé conas a bhfuil mé ag mothú ceart anois. Dhá uair an chloig de scoil fágtha. Is féidir linn é seo a dhéanamh. Ó, agus tá Kaleb i LA an tseachtain seo, a dhéanann rudaí go léir an níos measa. Ní raibh Jeremiah mhaith an smaoineamh Daid a bheith ar shiúl, agus Gabe tá sé cinnte ag dul ar a scriú suas. Dia liom. Féidir liom a bhraitheann sé. Dhíth orm níos mó de chuid na síochána. Beannachtaí! Hannah Fág nóta tráchta | | Tags: Uchtála , dúshláin iompar , cúram altrama , difríochtaí Foghlama , tuistiú