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A natural desire of each human being is to achieve happiness, love, fulfillment and creative self-actualization. However, we can not expect that our subconscious minds, along with our experiences, can change spontaneously, without our conscious effort. Each moment of our life is an opportunity to recognize limiting beliefs and emotions and start changing them. Our deepest, often very unconscious and limiting beliefs (“I’m not OK”; “There isn’t enough”; “I don’t deserve love, happiness etc.”) may even be contrary to our conscious beliefs. However, we can become aware of them if we learn to listen and pay attention to our subtle emotional patterns (and, particularly important, if we practice an unconditional honesty with ourselves). We can discover such beliefs by observing our own life: by noticing which problems keep reappearing, what kind of people and what life conditions do we attract (or are unable to attract) etc. Our deepest beliefs are the ones we acquire at the earliest stage of life. They represent a foundation and a filter for all other experiences and they have an impact on how we interpret all our later experiences. In this manner we create a stable view of the world, which in turn becomes so natural to us that we never question it. This is why the critical emotional blocks towards a better life are also the most difficult ones to be aware of, because it can be difficult to even imagine a different reality. We accept such beliefs primarily from our parents and other important figures in our early lives, from their words and behavior, but we also receive them on the non-verbal, emotional level. Our own experiences are also important, where by rule the most painful ones are the ones we remember best. This is so because such experiences are unexpected and frightening to children, but they must fit them into their view of the world and do so by creating “negative” beliefs. In that manner emotions and whole parts of a personality are being repressed (together with parts of our original identity and original qualities like joy, love, self-confidence…). As a result, those parts do not mature like the rest of our personality but remain on the same developmental level as in the time when the trauma occurred. We all carry many such immature personality parts that can be easily activated in situations which remind us of the original trauma. This causes irrational and exaggerated reactions of anger, fear, shame, jealousy etc. Such personality parts may impose unrealistic expectations of ourselves or of other people, for example that they should provide what we could not get from our parents. Psychologists believe that 80% of a human personality is formed by the age of 8, while important character foundations are formed by the age of 3. Yet, if you are willing to work on changing yourself, these workshops are created to identify and resolve the causes of your problems, rather than to temporarily reduce the consequences. All the workshops on this page are taught by Kosjenka Muk. SELF-ESTEEM AND SELF-CONFIDENCE (TWO-DAY WORKSHOP) This workshop focuses on your relationship with yourself as the key aspect of a good life. Your self-image determines your daily mood, communication with others, reactions to life experiences and the level to which you will unconsciously allow yourself to realise your goals. As a rule, the key obstacle to realisation of any goal, spiritual and material alike, is a deeply suppressed feeling that we do not deserve it. Are you satisfied with the way you perceive yourself and with your normal state of mind and emotions? Do you notice that you lack self-confidence or that you express false, aggressive confidence? Are you happy with your communication with others and with your ability to give and receive love? Do you react with anger, fear, or feel humiliated when other people act in unpleasant ways? Do you dare to pursuit big goals or do you give them up because you feel that such goals are out of your reach? Do you love yourself? Learn how to become truly close to yourself; how to love yourself and explore your emotions in order to identify and heal limiting beliefs. Heal guilt and attachment to suffering. Learn to enjoy every moment of your life and awake your life passion. Confront “difficult people” calmly and without anger or fear. This workshop includes key ideas, exercises and practices developed through many years of experience. Recommended articles: What is Self-esteem? Self-Esteem and Violence VERBAL SELF-DEFENSE (ONE-DAY WORKSHOP) Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. (Ambrose Bierce) Do you often find yourself thinking: “If I only knew better how to respond to that person! If I only noticed that those words were an attack against me! Maybe I could have reacted better instead of getting angry and throwing insults? How could I find proper words when I wish to express myself?...” Immature and inconsiderate behaviour is common. Most people see others through their emotional and mental filters and projections. We can all easily experience childish, unrealistic emotions in any conversation, which may be caused by tiny, irrelevant triggers. Lies, open or hidden aggression, cynicism, victim games, power struggle… are everyday situations. Most people didn't have a chance to learn how to deal with such situations in mature ways. Common reactions include fight or flight instead of expressing oneself assertively but respectfully. This workshop is an opportunity for you to learn how to do the best you can for yourself, for the other person and for your relationship. A little time and effort invested can transform your relationships into a source of enthusiasm, happiness and fulfillment instead of confusion and suffering. In this workshop you will learn: to identify unwanted behaviour to understand what is going on inside the other person and what is their motivation types of difficult personalities and how to deal with each of them how to bring out the best in other people to understand your own feelings and express them in mature ways how to show to somebody that they have crossed your boundaries to remain resourceful in difficult conversations verbal self-defense at work and other specific situations to recognize and understand non-verbal communication …and much more! Recommended articles: The Art of Communication, Power and Manipulation Non-Verbal and Subtle Communication HAPPY PARTNERSHIP (ONE-DAY WORKSHOP) Love relationships bring out everything we have learned from our parents on relationships, love and communication. Such an intimate relationship with another human being is a mirror which reflects all our emotional patterns and issues, but also all positive aspects of our relationships with ourselves. Our “inner child” is often attracted to circumstances or the type of person which is subconsciously associated to love. Perhaps, as a child, you have learned to equal love with struggle, dependence, fear or even loneliness. Maybe you started to believe that love is out of your reach, that you don’t deserve it or that you deserve it only if you sacrifice your true self and your needs… Some people, tired by repeating the same patterns over and over again, or even still in childhood, come to a conclusion that it's better to be alone than to get hurt – or they hope that the outer circumstances will change without them confronting their emotional issues. Thus they can miss opportunities for wonderful experiences of love, trust and intimacy with another person, and for intense personal growth within an intimate relationship. You can create the kind of partnership you want! If you are in a promising relationship, its quality can improve in numerous ways, and you can save yourself years of learning by trial and error … and maybe even years of slowly closing in and suffering. If you want a new relationship, you can learn how to open up for it, choose the best possible partner for you and prepare in the best possible way for a relationship which will truly make your life fulfilled. This workshop deals with: intense work on identifying and resolving self-sabotage in context of successful partnership; recognizing age regression and projections and how to deal with them quality communication (especially considering the gender differences) conflict solving creating intimacy and trust This seminar is intended for singles and for people who have a partner and wish to improve their relationship alike. It is not necessary to attend it with a partner (although it is recommendable). Recommended articles: In Love and the Ending Relationships
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Govorite iz ljutnje... i izreći ćete najljepši govor kojeg ćete ikad požaliti. (Ambrose Bierce) Uhvatite li se često u mislima: 'Da sam barem znala/znao bolje se snaći u onom razgovoru! Da sam barem uopće primijetila da su one riječi bile napad na mene! Možda sam mogao i pametnije reagirati umjesto bijesom i vrijeđanjem? Kako da nađem prave riječi kad želim nešto izraziti, a bojim se reakcije?...' U društvu u kojem živimo gotovo svaki trenutak možemo očekivati nezrelo i neobzirno ponašanje. Iluzija je nadati se da će nas drugi ljudi vidjeti onakve kakvi stvarno jesmo, umjesto kroz svoje emocionalno-mentalne filtere i projekcije. Gotovo u svakom razgovoru, svakom se na kraće ili duže trenutke bude dječje, nerealistične emocije čak i zbog iracionalnih sitnica. Laganje, otvorena ili prikrivena agresija, cinizam, igre žrtve, borba za moć... svakodnevne su situacije. Rijetko tko od nas imao je prilike naučiti zrelo i smireno se postaviti u takvim okolnostima. Uobičajene su reakcije napad ili povlačenje, umjesto izražavanja sebe koje uključuje poštovanje prema sebi i prema drugima. Ovaj seminar prilika je da naučite kako da u svakoj situaciji učinite najbolje što možete i za sebe, i za drugu osobu, i za vaš međusobni odnos. Nešto uloženog vremena i truda može učiniti vaše odnose izvorom entuzijazma, radosti i ispunjenja umjesto zbunjenosti i patnje. Na ovom seminaru učit ćete: prepoznati neželjeno ponašanje - razumjeti što se događa u drugim ljudima i njihovu motivaciju - tipologija teških osobnosti i kako se suočiti sa svakom od njih - kako potaći ono najbolje u drugima - razumjeti svoje osjećaje i izraziti ih na zreo način - dati drugoj osobi do znanja da je prešla granice - ostati smireni i samopouzdani - verbalna samoobrana na poslu i drugim specifičnim situacijama - prepoznavanje i tumačenje neverbalne komunikacije - ... i više! Seminar traje jedan dan. Cijena je 300 kn. Preporučujemo članke: Neverbalna i suptilna komunikacija Komunikacijske vještine, moć i manipulacija Samopoštovanje i samopouzdanje