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YOUNG PEOPLE ASK Should We Break Up?—Part 1 Download Sometimes a breakup is a blessing. Consider the experience of Jill. “At first,” she says, “I was flattered that my boyfriend was always worrying about where I was, what I was doing, and whom I was with. But it got to the point where I couldn’t spend time with anyone but him. He even got jealous when I spent time with my family Sarah had a similar experience. She began to notice that John, the young man she was dating, was sarcastic, demanding, and rude. “One time,” Sarah recalls, “he came to the door three hours late! He ignored my mother when she answered the door, and then he said: ‘Let’s go. We’re late.’ Not ‘I’m late,’ but ‘We’re late.’ He should have apologized or explained himself. Most of all, he should have shown my mother respect!” Of course, a single disappointing act or trait doesn’t necessarily doom a relationship. (Psalm 130:3) But when Sarah realized that John’s rudeness was a pattern rather than an isolated incident, she decided to end the relationship. What if, like Jill and Sarah, you determine that the person you’re dating wouldn’t make a suitable marriage partner? In that case, do not ignore your feelings! Hard as it is to accept, it might be best to end the relationship. Proverbs 22:3 says: “Shrewd is the one that has seen the calamity and proceeds to conceal himself.” True, breaking up may not be easy. But marriage is a permanent bond. It’s better to live with short-term pain now than suffer with lifelong regret later!
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MLADI PITAJU... Trebamo li prekinuti vezu? Ako u vezi stalno dolazi do problema, možda je najbolje jednostavno prekinuti. Pogledajmo što se dogodilo Kristini. Ona kaže: “U početku mi je laskalo što moj dečko vodi računa o tome gdje sam, s kim sam i što radim. No to je otišlo tako daleko da na kraju nisam mogla provoditi vrijeme ni s kim drugim osim s njim. Bio bi ljubomoran čak i kad bi čuo da planiram provesti vrijeme sa svojom obitelji, a naročito s ocem. Kad sam prekinula s tim dečkom, osjećala sam se kao da mi je pao kamen sa srca!” I Sara je imala problema sa svojim dečkom. Primijetila je da je sarkastičan, zahtjevan i neuljudan. Ona priča: “Jednom je po mene došao tri sata kasnije nego što smo se dogovorili! Moja mu je mama otvorila vrata, a on je praktički nije ni pogledao, nego se obratio meni i rekao: ‘Idemo! Kasnimo.’ Nije se ispričao niti objasnio zašto je toliko zakasnio. Samo je rekao: ‘Kasnimo’, kao da smo za to oboje krivi. Ali najviše mi je zasmetalo što se prema mojoj mami nije ponio s poštovanjem.” Naravno, ako te osoba s kojom hodaš jednom razočara ili ima neku osobinu koja ti se ne sviđa, to ne mora značiti da je vaša veza osuđena na propast (Psalam 130:3). No kad je Sara shvatila da se njen dečko i u drugim prilikama ponaša neuljudno, odlučila je prekinuti s njim. Što učiniti ako, poput Kristine i Sare, shvatiš da osoba s kojom si u vezi ne bi bila dobar bračni partner? Nemoj potiskivati osjećaje koji ti govore da nešto nije u redu! Premda je to teško priznati, možda bi ipak bilo najbolje prekinuti vezu. U Mudrim izrekama 22:3 stoji: “Pametan čovjek vidi zlo i skloni se.” Istina, nije lako prekinuti s nekim. No treba imati na umu da je brak trajna veza. Stoga je bolje sada podnijeti kratkotrajnu emocionalnu bol nego kasnije patiti cijeli život!