<p>In my opinion, the most important model of monogamous relationships is the attachment model, developed by Bowlby (1969). According to Fraley and Shaver: all romantic, or couple, relationships are attachment relationships. After <em>imprinting</em>, the characteristics of the attachment's figure (generally the mother), and the style of parenting will be recognised by the baby as the ones who are deputy to take care of him. So the baby develops expectations and begins to build his IWM (internal Working Models).
People actively seek and select - even at an unconscious level - people, situations, and relationships that match their expectations and their IWM (Grazia Attili, 2004)</p>

<p>In this frame, Cindy Hazan and Debra Zeifman introduced a model of <strong>Romantic relationships</strong> based on 4 stages:</p>

<ol>
<li>Attraction, courting, flirt</li>
<li>Falling in love</li>
<li>Love</li>
<li>Ordinary life and attachment </li>
</ol>

<p>For more information I recommend:</p>

<ul>
<li><p>Grazia Attili "Attaccamento e amore" : <a href="https://www.mulino.it/isbn/9788815096845" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https://www.mulino.it/isbn/9788815096845</a></p></li>
<li><p>"Adult Romantic Attachment: Theoretical Developments,
Emerging Controversies, and Unanswered Questions" by Fraley and Shaver <a href="http://academic.udayton.edu/jackbauer/Readings%20595/Fraley%2000%20attch%20rev%20copy.pdf" rel="nofollow noreferrer">http://academic.udayton.edu/jackbauer/Readings%20595/Fraley%2000%20attch%20rev%20copy.pdf</a></p></li>
<li><p>John Bowlby . <a href="https://books.google.it/books/about/Attachment.html?id=WA7JejeXYd4C&amp;redir_esc=y" rel="nofollow noreferrer">https://books.google.it/books/about/Attachment.html?id=WA7JejeXYd4C&amp;redir_esc=y</a></p></li>
</ul>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2017-06-14T16:36:05.587Z
2017-06-14T16:36:05.587Z
Fil
<p><a href="https://cogsci.stackexchange.com/q/17474/4397">I was looking into the concept of limerence as a stage of evolution in a romantic relationship</a>, however I couldn't contrast it with other models and their components. Assuming that romantic relationships probably vary largely depending from cultural background, what are the leading models of monogamous relationship evolution in the field of social psychology?</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2017-06-12T04:53:24.617Z
Do you mean something like [this](http://family-marriage-counseling.com/mentalhealth/relationship-basics.htm)?
mflo-ByeSE
CC BY-SA 3.0
2017-06-12T05:00:01.217Z
@mfloren yes, but with more empirical grounding?
Seanny123
CC BY-SA 4.0
2018-07-11T17:19:06.327Z
Do you assume something is substantially different in non-monogamous relationships? E.g. polyamory.
rus9384
CC BY-SA 4.0
2018-07-20T15:10:05.607Z
@rus9384 yes, because there's more people involved which would be harder to model? Honestly, when I asked this question, I was just curious by what other people have tried.
Seanny123
<social-psychology><reference-request>
Models of romantic relationships evolution
Seanny123
# Models of romantic relationships evolution

(Asked by: username_0 on 2017-06-11)

[I was looking into the concept of limerence as a stage of evolution in a romantic relationship](https://cogsci.stackexchange.com/q/17474/4397), however I couldn't contrast it with other models and their components. Assuming that romantic relationships probably vary largely depending from cultural background, what are the leading models of monogamous relationship evolution in the field of social psychology?

**Tags:** social-psychology, reference-request

> **Comments:**
> **username_1**: Do you mean something like [this](http://family-marriage-counseling.com/mentalhealth/relationship-basics.htm)?  
> **username_0**: @mfloren yes, but with more empirical grounding?  
> **username_2**: Do you assume something is substantially different in non-monogamous relationships? E.g. polyamory.  
> **username_0**: @username_2 yes, because there's more people involved which would be harder to model? Honestly, when I asked this question, I was just curious by what other people have tried.  

---

## 1 answers

### Answer by username_3 on 2017-06-14. Score: 3

In my opinion, the most important model of monogamous relationships is the attachment model, developed by Bowlby (1969). According to Fraley and Shaver: all romantic, or couple, relationships are attachment relationships. After *imprinting*, the characteristics of the attachment's figure (generally the mother), and the style of parenting will be recognised by the baby as the ones who are deputy to take care of him. So the baby develops expectations and begins to build his IWM (internal Working Models).
People actively seek and select - even at an unconscious level - people, situations, and relationships that match their expectations and their IWM (Grazia Attili, 2004)

In this frame, Cindy Hazan and Debra Zeifman introduced a model of **Romantic relationships** based on 4 stages:

1. Attraction, courting, flirt
2. Falling in love
3. Love
4. Ordinary life and attachment

For more information I recommend:

* Grazia Attili "Attaccamento e amore" : <https://www.mulino.it/isbn/9788815096845>
* "Adult Romantic Attachment: Theoretical Developments,
  Emerging Controversies, and Unanswered Questions" by Fraley and Shaver <http://academic.udayton.edu/jackbauer/Readings%20595/Fraley%2000%20attch%20rev%20copy.pdf>
* John Bowlby . <https://books.google.it/books/about/Attachment.html?id=WA7JejeXYd4C&redir_esc=y>


---

