<p>吃豆腐 refers to sexual harassment or men being frivolous with women. </p>

<p>Apparently it refers to a Tofu-shop a long time ago where the husbands rubs the tofu at night and the wife sells it during the day. To sell more tofu the wife flirts with her customers and the customers even grope her. The jealous wives of these "customers" will afterwards complain to their husbands: "So you went out to eat tofu again"</p>

<p><strong>Edit</strong>: I can't find the real source of the story, but you can find it on many Chinese sites. It's probably a tale. About the translation, there are many possible gradations. I can go from "I (will) take advantage of you" to "I'll molest you" (actually it can both be in the past, the present or the future). Sometimes 吃豆腐 can also mean to crack a joke, but it's not the most common translation.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2012-04-27T18:42:54.007Z
+1 Ahah wow! Is it a real story or some tale/cultural thing? And how would you translate the sentence in "plain" English?
Alenanno
CC BY-SA 3.0
2012-04-27T17:56:44.087Z
2012-04-27T21:28:52.143Z
2012-04-27T21:28:52.143Z
BertR
<p>There's a section about the history of the term 「吃豆腐」on <a href="https://zh.wikipedia.org/zh-tw/%E5%90%83%E8%B1%86%E8%85%90#%E6%AD%B7%E5%8F%B2" rel="nofollow noreferrer">Wikipedia</a>. I have translated some of it.</p>
<p>「吃豆腐」can have two meanings:</p>
<ol>
<li><p>take advantage of somebody</p>
<p>In Jiangsu and Zhejiang, there's a tradition to treat family members and neighbors who have helped in the funeral with thick tofu soup. Some people goofing around will come over for a meal as if they've helped.</p>
</li>
<li><p>take advantage of somebody sexually (this usage is more common nowadays.)</p>
<p>About the same as <a href="https://chinese.stackexchange.com/a/1043/19680">Don Kirkby♦'s answer</a>.</p>
</li>
</ol>
<blockquote>
<h1>1. 作為佔便宜的委婉詞</h1>
<p>「吃豆腐」作為佔便宜的委婉詞，可追溯到中國江浙一帶的俚語詞彙「吃豆腐羹」，喪事完結後，喪家會請曾經幫忙過的鄉親吃齋菜。有些悠手好閒者，會借詞說「曾經幫忙」而佔喪家便宜，一同赴宴。由於齋菜宴席上大多會有一道「豆腐羹」的菜色出現，所以有「吃豆腐」一詞的出現，形容這些無恥地佔人家便宜的人。</p>
<h1>2. 作為性騷擾的委婉詞</h1>
<p>吃豆腐作為「調戲」和「性騷擾」的委婉詞彙，有兩種說法。</p>
<p>第一種說法源於西漢時期。當時豆腐剛剛流行於民間，而京城街上有一個夫妻合開的豆腐店。那店舖的老闆娘為吸引顧客，有時會做出賣弄風情的行為，並吸引到一群男人以「吃豆腐」為藉口到豆腐店調戲老闆娘。</p>
<p>第二種說法與第一種說法大致相同，但源於清代小說「驚夢啼」。小說裏有一位叫名為春桃的豔色女子。她經營賣豆腐的生意，亦愛與男人打情罵俏，所以會有男性顧客專程來「買豆腐」，但實則調戲那位老闆娘。</p>
</blockquote>

CC BY-SA 4.0
2020-07-08T09:31:20.997Z
2021-06-02T15:55:55.927Z
2021-06-02T15:55:55.927Z
thyu
<p>You are all experts on chinese culcure. But allow me to add some comment. Another Chineses expression regarding 吃我豆腐 is 占我便宜,which also means taking advantage of me. But in the contemporary era, girls use 吃我豆腐 to expecially describe some one touched her boobs. Because they bear great similarities in both appearance and feel.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2015-08-16T12:34:33.440Z
2015-08-16T12:34:33.440Z
Johnson Gul
<p>Used to refer to men who just want sex from a woman. </p>

CC BY-SA 4.0
2020-02-12T20:57:36.987Z
2020-02-12T20:57:36.987Z
Melvin holt
<p>I've only heard it used in describing sexual situations, and <a href="http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E5%90%83%E8%B1%86%E8%85%90">wiktionary.org</a> describes its usage as follows:</p>

<blockquote>
  <p>This idiom usually only refers to a man taking advantage of a woman in a sexual situation.</p>
</blockquote>

<p>A typical example would be some creepy guy pinching the flight attendant's backside as she walks past.</p>

<p>There's also a good discussion at <a href="http://forum.wordreference.com/showthread.php?t=2262646&amp;langid=22">wordreference.com</a>.</p>

<blockquote>
  <p>不要吃我豆腐 is telling someone not to take advantage of me, but specifically in a sexual way, as in inappropriate touches etc. However, the accusation is not very serious in Chinese, and sometimes said in a joking manner. I would translate it as "Don't harasse me!", "Get your hands off me!" etc., but understand that the Chinese expression is softer.</p>
</blockquote>

<p>I found an origin story on <a href="http://www.chinese-forums.com/index.php?/topic/23974-do-these-words-just-mean-tease-or-something-more-serious/page__p__198030#entry198030">chinese-forums.com</a>, but I'm not sure how reliable it is.</p>

<blockquote>
  <p>It’s said that tofu shops usually were run by wife and husband in the old days. Female boss in a tofu shop took tofu as their daily food, which made their skin tender and smooth. On one hand their fine skin helped attract more customers, on the other hand it showed some kind of coquetry to them. Men liked to take “to eat tofu” as an excuse to go to a tofu shop and flirt with the female boss there, verbally or even physically. Therefore, wives, feeling jealous, scolded their husbands, “Today, you went to eat tofu again?!” Now, “eating tofu” has become a word to describe man flirts with woman.</p>
</blockquote>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2012-01-24T22:35:35.557Z
That is an awesome story! It's really interesting learning the origins of expressions like this. Thanks :-)
Ciaocibai
CC BY-SA 3.0
2012-02-01T23:19:38.807Z
When I was going to school in Taiwan many years ago, our teacher told us that 吃豆腐 just came from the fact that toufu is white and smooth, and girls who have light, smooth skin are thought of as beautiful. (Perhaps she just made it up?)
Alex D
CC BY-SA 3.0
2012-04-30T20:24:23.467Z
A comparable American expression is "eating someone's lunch." That is taking a business or social opportunity that really "belongs" to someone else. Flirting with some man's "tofu lady" wife would fall into that category.
Tom Au
CC BY-SA 3.0
2012-01-24T20:36:57.890Z
2015-04-05T13:43:35.990Z
2015-04-05T13:43:35.990Z
Don Kirkby
<p>I'm not talking about eating tofu, but the expression that means something more like taking advantage of someone. What exactly does 吃豆腐 mean, and where does this expression come from?</p>

CC BY-SA 4.0
2020-02-13T03:01:16.737Z
Now this elastic expression, 吃豆腐, has morphed to mean "cunnilingus"

Let your imagination be the guide.

However, when ordering tofu dishes in a Chinese restaurant, and it is a waitress taking the order, well, just be careful how you phrase your order.

Another elastic term  is "叫鸡“，i.e. "calling for or ordering chicken" It means, in derogatory speech,  to look for a prostitute. So here too be careful when using it in a Chinese restaurant.
Wayne Cheah
CC BY-SA 4.0
2020-02-13T03:09:07.973Z
There is also 磨豆腐, describing lesbian sexual acts.
Wayne Cheah
<mandarin><meaning><etymology><idioms><phrase>
What is the exact meaning of 吃豆腐, and where does the expression come from?
# What is the exact meaning of 吃豆腐, and where does the expression come from?

(Asked by: username_0 on 2012-01-24)

I'm not talking about eating tofu, but the expression that means something more like taking advantage of someone. What exactly does 吃豆腐 mean, and where does this expression come from?

**Tags:** mandarin, meaning, etymology, idioms, phrase

> **Comments:**
> **username_1**: Now this elastic expression, 吃豆腐, has morphed to mean "cunnilingus"  Let your imagination be the guide.  However, when ordering tofu dishes in a Chinese restaurant, and it is a waitress taking the order, well, just be careful how you phrase your order.  Another elastic term  is "叫鸡“，i.e. "calling for or ordering chicken" It means, in derogatory speech,  to look for a prostitute. So here too be careful when using it in a Chinese restaurant.  
> **username_1**: There is also 磨豆腐, describing lesbian sexual acts.  

---

## 5 answers

### Answer by username_7 on 2012-01-24. Score: 22 | Accepted answer

I've only heard it used in describing sexual situations, and [wiktionary.org](http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E5%90%83%E8%B1%86%E8%85%90) describes its usage as follows:

> This idiom usually only refers to a man taking advantage of a woman in a sexual situation.

A typical example would be some creepy guy pinching the flight attendant's backside as she walks past.

There's also a good discussion at [wordreference.com](http://forum.wordreference.com/showthread.php?t=2262646&langid=22).

> 不要吃我豆腐 is telling someone not to take advantage of me, but specifically in a sexual way, as in inappropriate touches etc. However, the accusation is not very serious in Chinese, and sometimes said in a joking manner. I would translate it as "Don't harasse me!", "Get your hands off me!" etc., but understand that the Chinese expression is softer.

I found an origin story on [chinese-forums.com](http://www.chinese-forums.com/index.php?/topic/23974-do-these-words-just-mean-tease-or-something-more-serious/page__p__198030#entry198030), but I'm not sure how reliable it is.

> It’s said that tofu shops usually were run by wife and husband in the old days. Female boss in a tofu shop took tofu as their daily food, which made their skin tender and smooth. On one hand their fine skin helped attract more customers, on the other hand it showed some kind of coquetry to them. Men liked to take “to eat tofu” as an excuse to go to a tofu shop and flirt with the female boss there, verbally or even physically. Therefore, wives, feeling jealous, scolded their husbands, “Today, you went to eat tofu again?!” Now, “eating tofu” has become a word to describe man flirts with woman.

> **Comments:**
> **username_0**: That is an awesome story! It's really interesting learning the origins of expressions like this. Thanks :-)  
> **username_8**: When I was going to school in Taiwan many years ago, our teacher told us that 吃豆腐 just came from the fact that toufu is white and smooth, and girls who have light, smooth skin are thought of as beautiful. (Perhaps she just made it up?)  
> **username_9**: A comparable American expression is "eating someone's lunch." That is taking a business or social opportunity that really "belongs" to someone else. Flirting with some man's "tofu lady" wife would fall into that category.  

---

### Answer by username_2 on 2012-04-27. Score: 6

吃豆腐 refers to sexual harassment or men being frivolous with women.

Apparently it refers to a Tofu-shop a long time ago where the husbands rubs the tofu at night and the wife sells it during the day. To sell more tofu the wife flirts with her customers and the customers even grope her. The jealous wives of these "customers" will afterwards complain to their husbands: "So you went out to eat tofu again"

**Edit**: I can't find the real source of the story, but you can find it on many Chinese sites. It's probably a tale. About the translation, there are many possible gradations. I can go from "I (will) take advantage of you" to "I'll molest you" (actually it can both be in the past, the present or the future). Sometimes 吃豆腐 can also mean to crack a joke, but it's not the most common translation.

> **Comments:**
> **username_3**: +1 Ahah wow! Is it a real story or some tale/cultural thing? And how would you translate the sentence in "plain" English?  

---

### Answer by username_4 on 2020-07-08. Score: 2

There's a section about the history of the term 「吃豆腐」on [Wikipedia](https://zh.wikipedia.org/zh-tw/%E5%90%83%E8%B1%86%E8%85%90#%E6%AD%B7%E5%8F%B2). I have translated some of it.

「吃豆腐」can have two meanings:

1. take advantage of somebody

   In Jiangsu and Zhejiang, there's a tradition to treat family members and neighbors who have helped in the funeral with thick tofu soup. Some people goofing around will come over for a meal as if they've helped.
2. take advantage of somebody sexually (this usage is more common nowadays.)

   About the same as [username_7♦'s answer](https://chinese.stackexchange.com/a/1043/19680).

> # 1. 作為佔便宜的委婉詞
>
> 「吃豆腐」作為佔便宜的委婉詞，可追溯到中國江浙一帶的俚語詞彙「吃豆腐羹」，喪事完結後，喪家會請曾經幫忙過的鄉親吃齋菜。有些悠手好閒者，會借詞說「曾經幫忙」而佔喪家便宜，一同赴宴。由於齋菜宴席上大多會有一道「豆腐羹」的菜色出現，所以有「吃豆腐」一詞的出現，形容這些無恥地佔人家便宜的人。
>
> # 2. 作為性騷擾的委婉詞
>
> 吃豆腐作為「調戲」和「性騷擾」的委婉詞彙，有兩種說法。
>
> 第一種說法源於西漢時期。當時豆腐剛剛流行於民間，而京城街上有一個夫妻合開的豆腐店。那店舖的老闆娘為吸引顧客，有時會做出賣弄風情的行為，並吸引到一群男人以「吃豆腐」為藉口到豆腐店調戲老闆娘。
>
> 第二種說法與第一種說法大致相同，但源於清代小說「驚夢啼」。小說裏有一位叫名為春桃的豔色女子。她經營賣豆腐的生意，亦愛與男人打情罵俏，所以會有男性顧客專程來「買豆腐」，但實則調戲那位老闆娘。


---

### Answer by username_5 on 2015-08-16. Score: 1

You are all experts on chinese culcure. But allow me to add some comment. Another Chineses expression regarding 吃我豆腐 is 占我便宜,which also means taking advantage of me. But in the contemporary era, girls use 吃我豆腐 to expecially describe some one touched her boobs. Because they bear great similarities in both appearance and feel.


---

### Answer by username_6 on 2020-02-12. Score: -1

Used to refer to men who just want sex from a woman.


---

