<p>As <a href="https://chinese.stackexchange.com/users/2700/fluffy">fluffy</a>'s answer has noted, 小姐 may now cause confusion because of its other meaning - a prostitute. So you may want to avoid that unless used as an honorific e.g. 董小姐.</p>

<hr>

<p>According to my knowledge, in the north (of mainland China), they are usually called <a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E6%9C%8D%E5%8B%99%E5%93%A1#Chinese" rel="nofollow noreferrer">服务员</a>(server), both male and female. But in the south, they are usually called <a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E5%B8%A5%E5%93%A5#Chinese" rel="nofollow noreferrer">帅哥</a>(handsome man) for waiter and <a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E7%BE%8E%E5%A5%B3#Chinese" rel="nofollow noreferrer">美女</a>(beautiful lady) for waitress, instead of calling them a server. And in Guangdong or Cantonese-dominant region, they are called <a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E9%9D%9A%E4%BB%94#Chinese" rel="nofollow noreferrer">靚仔</a> and <a href="https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E9%9D%9A%E5%A5%B3#Chinese" rel="nofollow noreferrer">靚女</a> respectively, basically the same meaning as 帅哥/美女.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2018-03-31T19:41:11.963Z
2018-03-31T19:41:11.963Z
zypA13510
<p>As far as I know, 小姐 (xiao3jie3) is not very appreciated anymore by waitresses, even in Beijing; they might even be offended because that is how girls who sell their bodies are addressed. That is how Chinese people explained it to me. Waiters, be it male or female, are addressed as 服务员 (fu2wu4yuan2) and it is safe to call them that.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-25T13:59:43.657Z
服务员(Attendant) also sounds a little old-fashioned.
Stan
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-19T10:13:50.747Z
2013-05-19T10:13:50.747Z
fluffy
<p>It is offensive to call any woman “shiao jie”(or in Pinyin, xiao jie) these days. Since maybe ten years ago "shiao jie" has carried the implication of being a prostitute(before that "shiao jie" is equivalent to Miss). And "da ge", "shiao ge", "da di", "shao di" are not proper addresses. "Da ge" is usually related to gangs in cities, and in rural areas it can be used to address a man who is older than you. "Xiao ge" is not used now, except for humorous effect. "Da di" is an old-old-old-fashioned word for your biggest little brother. "Shiao di" is the exact opposite of "da ge". You can call any waitor, either male or female, "fu wu yuan".</p>

<p>P.S. why can't I agree or comment here? I read through the FAQ section yet found no answer.</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-19T21:30:44.770Z
You need 50 reputation to be able to comment on other questions and answers; you can comment on your own questions and answers any time.
yuritsuki
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-19T21:40:39.750Z
Read more at: http://chinese.stackexchange.com/faq#reputation
yuritsuki
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2013-05-20T02:15:44.023Z
@Retrosaur thx, seems I didn't read carefully enough xD
arax
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-21T23:51:12.527Z
@AlexSu Please try to use pinyin as much as possible as it is the standard transcription scheme used on an international level at the moment. I believe even Taiwan has started to move towards this direction.
deutschZuid
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-22T01:59:46.600Z
@deutschZuid Pinyin is a system for Chinese kids to learn how to pronounce, so basically it's not intended  for people who can't speak Mandarin. If you are motivated enough to learn Mandarin, Pinyin is not that hard actually, it's just a different set of symbols which can be somehow mapped to what you call standard scheme. And anyway 小 is not pronounced in Mandarin how you pronounce “shiao”. There are phonemes in Mandarin that don't exist in European languages(and there are more phonemes in Cantonese). And Taiwan has always been using the “standard scheme”. It's just different, not better.
arax
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-22T02:04:43.647Z
and by Pinyin we're not referring to the same thing. I forgot their formal names xD
arax
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-22T03:15:55.870Z
@Alexsu I am not sure where you get the idea that pinyin is not intended for people who are learning Mandarin. It's THE transcription standard used internationally for teaching people who wish to speak Mandarin as a secondary language, much like the romaji. I've taught Mandarin myself. In all the universities that I am aware of that teach Mandarin, pinyin is used for beginners. Not some pseudo scheme that someone just came up with (like 'shiao', which really only works in English).
deutschZuid
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-22T03:21:36.897Z
Besides I am really confused whether you are agreeing with me or not. You seem to be talking about completely different points to the one I am trying to make - which is, avoid pseudo-stuff and use internationally recognized standards.
deutschZuid
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-22T03:48:58.783Z
@deutschZuid sorry i got confused. We are holding the same opinion. I thought you meant “shiao” when you say “Pinyin”. And that was my mistake. I'm a Chinese myself and I'm not familiar with Chinese-teaching, and I had thought that learners prefer these pseudo-pinyin(there's a term for it but i can't remember) when talking about pronunciation. my bad
arax
CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-19T16:06:23.227Z
2013-05-19T16:06:23.227Z
arax
<p>For female waiters, my dad taught me to use the phrase "小姐 ". </p>

<p>But for male waiters, my dad doesn't know how to properly call them. I discussed the possibility of using "da ge", "小ge", "da di", "小 di", but they sound whimsical compared to the way one calls for a female waiter.</p>

<p>How should one appropriately call for a male waiter?</p>

CC BY-SA 3.0
2013-05-19T03:02:06.147Z
You can try using the polite salutation 先生 (mister) or address them directly based on their occupation specifically as 侍应生 or more generally as 服务员.
杨以轩
<vocabulary><terms-of-address>
How do I call for a male waiter?
# How do I call for a male waiter?

(Asked by: username_0 on 2013-05-18)

For female waiters, my dad taught me to use the phrase "小姐 ".

But for male waiters, my dad doesn't know how to properly call them. I discussed the possibility of using "da ge", "小ge", "da di", "小 di", but they sound whimsical compared to the way one calls for a female waiter.

How should one appropriately call for a male waiter?

**Tags:** vocabulary, terms-of-address

> **Comments:**
> **username_1**: You can try using the polite salutation 先生 (mister) or address them directly based on their occupation specifically as 侍应生 or more generally as 服务员.  

---

## 3 answers

### Answer by username_2 on 2018-03-31. Score: 2 | Accepted answer

As [username_3](https://chinese.stackexchange.com/users/2700/username_3)'s answer has noted, 小姐 may now cause confusion because of its other meaning - a prostitute. So you may want to avoid that unless used as an honorific e.g. 董小姐.

---

According to my knowledge, in the north (of mainland China), they are usually called [服务员](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E6%9C%8D%E5%8B%99%E5%93%A1#Chinese)(server), both male and female. But in the south, they are usually called [帅哥](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E5%B8%A5%E5%93%A5#Chinese)(handsome man) for waiter and [美女](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E7%BE%8E%E5%A5%B3#Chinese)(beautiful lady) for waitress, instead of calling them a server. And in Guangdong or Cantonese-dominant region, they are called [靚仔](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E9%9D%9A%E4%BB%94#Chinese) and [靚女](https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E9%9D%9A%E5%A5%B3#Chinese) respectively, basically the same meaning as 帅哥/美女.


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### Answer by username_3 on 2013-05-19. Score: 7

As far as I know, 小姐 (xiao3jie3) is not very appreciated anymore by waitresses, even in Beijing; they might even be offended because that is how girls who sell their bodies are addressed. That is how Chinese people explained it to me. Waiters, be it male or female, are addressed as 服务员 (fu2wu4yuan2) and it is safe to call them that.

> **Comments:**
> **username_4**: 服务员(Attendant) also sounds a little old-fashioned.  

---

### Answer by username_5 on 2013-05-19. Score: 2

It is offensive to call any woman “shiao jie”(or in Pinyin, xiao jie) these days. Since maybe ten years ago "shiao jie" has carried the implication of being a prostitute(before that "shiao jie" is equivalent to Miss). And "da ge", "shiao ge", "da di", "shao di" are not proper addresses. "Da ge" is usually related to gangs in cities, and in rural areas it can be used to address a man who is older than you. "Xiao ge" is not used now, except for humorous effect. "Da di" is an old-old-old-fashioned word for your biggest little brother. "Shiao di" is the exact opposite of "da ge". You can call any waitor, either male or female, "fu wu yuan".

P.S. why can't I agree or comment here? I read through the FAQ section yet found no answer.

> **Comments:**
> **username_0**: You need 50 reputation to be able to comment on other questions and answers; you can comment on your own questions and answers any time.  
> **username_0**: Read more at: http://chinese.stackexchange.com/faq#reputation  
> **username_5**: @Retrosaur thx, seems I didn't read carefully enough xD  
> **username_6**: @AlexSu Please try to use pinyin as much as possible as it is the standard transcription scheme used on an international level at the moment. I believe even Taiwan has started to move towards this direction.  
> **username_5**: @username_6 Pinyin is a system for Chinese kids to learn how to pronounce, so basically it's not intended  for people who can't speak Mandarin. If you are motivated enough to learn Mandarin, Pinyin is not that hard actually, it's just a different set of symbols which can be somehow mapped to what you call standard scheme. And anyway 小 is not pronounced in Mandarin how you pronounce “shiao”. There are phonemes in Mandarin that don't exist in European languages(and there are more phonemes in Cantonese). And Taiwan has always been using the “standard scheme”. It's just different, not better.  
> **username_5**: and by Pinyin we're not referring to the same thing. I forgot their formal names xD  
> **username_6**: @Alexsu I am not sure where you get the idea that pinyin is not intended for people who are learning Mandarin. It's THE transcription standard used internationally for teaching people who wish to speak Mandarin as a secondary language, much like the romaji. I've taught Mandarin myself. In all the universities that I am aware of that teach Mandarin, pinyin is used for beginners. Not some pseudo scheme that someone just came up with (like 'shiao', which really only works in English).  
> **username_6**: Besides I am really confused whether you are agreeing with me or not. You seem to be talking about completely different points to the one I am trying to make - which is, avoid pseudo-stuff and use internationally recognized standards.  
> **username_5**: @username_6 sorry i got confused. We are holding the same opinion. I thought you meant “shiao” when you say “Pinyin”. And that was my mistake. I'm a Chinese myself and I'm not familiar with Chinese-teaching, and I had thought that learners prefer these pseudo-pinyin(there's a term for it but i can't remember) when talking about pronunciation. my bad  

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