Hello and Happy Holidays wherever you are around the world. I hope you had a wonderful, festive Christmas surrounded by friends, family and those you love. It feels like an absolute age since I last posted, and I guess it is. But I’m back now, and this one is for all you lucky ladies who went from girlfriend to fiancé status during the holidays. Congratulations, I’m sure his (or her) proposal was perfect in it’s own special way, unique to your relationship and personalities; but what next? I’m going to balance out the do’s with the don’ts so we keep the positivity vibes in perfect balance. Here’s my top tips of what to do and what not to do now that you’re engaged!
Do: Enjoy & Stay In The Moment
Don’t: Update Every Social Media Status
My advice is to take the time, as a couple, to let what just happened and what it means as a new chapter in your life together sink in, enjoy the thrill of it and take it all in; share this beautiful occasion with those closest to you in person, rather than through a screen. Resist the urge to update all your statuses and profiles across your social media accounts and end up ignoring your new fiancé – who has just proposed to you! – so you can post, reply and respond to a wave of congratulatory well wishes. Stay in the moment, together.
Do: Talk To Each Other, Plan Together
Don’t: Build A Bridal Party & Guest List
Remember you are in this together, so make sure you talk to each other about what you both want to do next, make sure you are both on the same page of what kind of day you want to create and have for your wedding. Don’t start asking your best friends to be your bridesmaids and compile an extensive guest list within minutes or even days of saying “yes!” Take the time to really think about what you do, who you ask, who you invite; because unless you’ve got one hell of a legitimate excuse, uninviting someone to your wedding or to come as just a guest instead of a member of the bridal party is awkward and sure to end in tears.
Do: Enjoy The Norm
Don’t: Make Everything Wedding Related
Essentially this is all about not turning into the ultimate, wedding-obsessed bride-to-be to such an extent that your fiancé, friends and family no longer recognise who you are. That is definitely something you don’t want. So stick to any plans you had previously made for holidays with friends and family, nights out with the girls etc. Don’t make every conversation, every trip, every thing you do or say be wedding-related, this comes back to my Reign It In post from a few months ago, and remembering that although it signifies spending the rest of your life with someone, it is just one day. Just because an activity, conversation or trip isn’t about your wedding, doesn’t mean it is no longer any fun. Still have date nights, and do normal “couple” stuff.
Do: Book The Date, Enjoy The Process
Don’t: Become Overwhelmed or Obsessed
There are lots of factors that can affect when you book the date of your wedding; reasons vary between couples that want and can afford a wedding within months of getting engaged and couples who, for many reasons, delay their wedding for years. One thing is for certain though, everyone is going to ask the question: “so when are you getting married?” as soon as they hear that you’re engaged. So whenever you decide to get married, enjoy the process that is involved. There’s a fine balance between enjoyment and obsession, and for many brides the feeling of being completely and utterly overwhelmed! It can be overwhelming, and stressful planning and organising a wedding whether it’s weeks, months or even years away; but it can also be hugely pleasurable and rewarding so make sure you enjoy this time. The key is not to take on too much and to take your time. Again, read my Reign It In post for my top tips on wedding planning and staying on budget.
I hope you have found this post helpful and inspiring, take a moment, have a cup of tea – if for no other reason than to admire how your hand now looks holding a tea cup and donning what is undoubtedly a beautiful ring!
Lots of love as always,