if you give regulators a job and say, "can you please regulate me?" they're going to try to come up with solution to regulate you, and that's why it's dangerous when a lot of people in the community are saying we are pro-regulation.

IH1 F-Y-UW1 G-IH1 V-R-EH1 G-Y-AH0 L-EY2 T-ER0 Z-AH0 JH-AA1 B-AH0-N-D S-EY1 K-AE1 N-Y-UW1 P-L-IY1 Z-R-EH1 G-Y-AH0 L-EY2 T-M-IY1 TH-EH1-R G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 T-R-AY1 T-UW1 K-AH1 M-AH1 P-W-IH1-DH S-AH0 L-UW1 SH-AH0-N T-UW1 R-EH1 G-Y-AH0 L-EY2 T-Y-UW1 AH0-N-D TH-AE1-T S-W-AY1 IH1-T-S D-EY1-N JH-ER0 AH0 S-W-EH1 N-AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1-V P-IY1 P-AH0 L-IH0-N DH-AH0 K-AH0 M-Y-UW1 N-AH0 T-IY0 AA1-R S-EY1 IH0 NG-W-IY1 AA1-R P-R-AO2 R-IH0 G-Y-UW0 L-EY1 SH-AH0-N


i don't think they really are.

AY1 D-AA1-N-T TH-IH1-NG-K DH-EY1 R-IH1 L-IY0 AA1-R


what are they called? the bitcoin foundation. sorry. are they able to alter the code in response to regulation, or is there-

W-AH1 T-AA1-R DH-EY1 K-AO1-L-D DH-AH0 B-IH1-T K-AH0-N F-AW0-N D-EY1 SH-AH0-N S-AA1 R-IY0 AA1-R DH-EY1 EY1 B-AH0-L T-UW1 AO1-L T-ER0 DH-AH0 K-OW1 D-IH0 N-R-IH0-S P-AA1-N-S T-UW1 R-EH2 G-Y-AH0 L-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AO1 R-IH1-Z DH-EH1-R


... at all?no, they're not. the bitcoin foundation has no power.yeah.sorry.

AE1 T-AA1-L N-OW0 TH-EH1-R N-AA1-T DH-AH0 B-IH1-T K-AH0-N F-AW0-N D-EY1 SH-AH0-N HH-AE1 Z-N-OW1 P-AW2 Y-ER0 IY1 SH-ER0 IY0-Z


i mean, they're lobbying. they have membership, but they have no more or less power. i mean, that's the beauty of our industry.

AY1 M-IY1-N TH-EH1-R L-AA1 B-IY0 IH0-NG DH-EY1 HH-AE1 V-M-EH1-M B-ER0 SH-IH2-P B-AH1-T DH-EY1 HH-AE1 V-N-OW1 M-AO1 R-AO1-R L-EH1-S P-AW1 ER0 AY1 M-IY1-N TH-AE1-T-S DH-AH0 B-Y-UW1 T-IY0 AH1 V-AW1 ER0 IH1-N D-AH0-S T-R-IY0


that's to touch on that. i know a lot of people are anti-bitcoin foundation, and i'm not actually a member of it just to steer clear of that. but i think they are doing a lot of good work, and are-

TH-AE1-T-S T-UW1 T-AH1 CH-AA1-N DH-AE1 T-AY1 N-OW1 AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1-V P-IY1 P-AH0 L-AA1 R-AE2-N T-IY0 T-IH1-B S-AH0-N-T F-AW0-N D-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-N D-IH1-M N-AA1 T-AE1-K CH-AH0 W-AH0 L-IY0 AH0 M-EH1-M B-ER0 AH1 V-IH1-T JH-AH1-S-T T-UW1-S T-IH1-R K-L-IH1 R-AH1-V DH-AE1-T B-AH1 T-AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K DH-EY1 AA1-R D-UW1 IH0 NG-AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1-V G-UH1 D-W-ER1 K-AH0-N D-AA1-R


they are trying to do a lot of work, and they're trying to figure things out. i think it's also important for everyone-

DH-EY1 AA1-R T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 D-UW1 AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1 V-W-ER1 K-AH0-N-D TH-EH1-R T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 F-IH1 G-Y-ER0 TH-IH1-NG Z-AW1 T-AY1 TH-IH1-NG K-IH1-T S-AO1-L S-OW0 IH0-M P-AO1-R T-AH0-N-T F-AO1 R-EH1 V-R-IY0 W-AH2-N


to keep in mind that you're not doing your part just by joining the bitcoin foundation, or any of these organizations. you can't have a centralized group going after a decentralized idea.

T-UW1 K-IY1 P-IH0-N M-AY1-N-D DH-AE1 T-Y-UH1-R N-AA1-T D-UW1 IH0 NG-Y-AO1-R P-AA1-R-T JH-AH1-S-T B-AY1 JH-OY1 N-IH0-NG DH-AH0 B-IH1-T K-AH0-N F-AW0-N D-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AO1 R-EH1 N-IY0 AH1-V DH-IY1 Z-AO2-R G-AH0 N-AH0 Z-EY1 SH-AH0-N Z-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N-T HH-AE1 V-AH0 S-EH1-N T-R-AH0 L-AY2-Z-D G-R-UW1-P G-OW1 IH0 NG-AE1-F T-ER0 AH0 D-IH0 S-EH1-N T-R-AH0 L-AY2-Z D-AY0 D-IY1 AH0


so, i think it needs to come from as many different areas as possible, and i think a lot of people forget that.

S-OW1 AY1 TH-IH1-NG K-IH1 T-N-IY1-D-Z T-UW1 K-AH1-M F-R-AH1 M-AE1 Z-M-EH1 N-IY0 D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0 Z-AE1-Z P-AA1 S-AH0 B-AH0 L-AH0-N D-AY1 TH-IH1-NG K-AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1-V P-IY1 P-AH0-L F-ER0 G-EH1-T DH-AE1-T


i just wanted to quickly mention to all the travelers that nothing in new zealand will kill you. our national bird would-

AY1 JH-AH1-S T-W-AA1-N T-AH0-D T-UW1 K-W-IH1 K-L-IY0 M-EH1-N SH-AH0-N T-UW1 AO1-L DH-AH0 T-R-AE1 V-AH0 L-ER0-Z DH-AE1 T-N-AH1 TH-IH0 NG-IH0-N N-UW1 Z-IY1 L-AH0-N D-W-IH1-L K-IH1 L-Y-UW1 AW1 ER0 N-AE1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-L B-ER1 D-W-UH1-D


we don't have any koalas.

W-IY1 D-AA1-N-T HH-AE1 V-EH1 N-IY0 K-OW0 AA1 L-AH0-Z


totally got time for one more question.

T-OW1 T-AH0 L-IY0 G-AA1-T T-AY1-M F-AO1 R-W-AH1-N M-AO1-R K-W-EH1-S CH-AH0-N


i'd just like to ask the panel, education in the sector, you know, for finance and-

IH1-D JH-AH1-S T-L-AY1-K T-UW1 AE1-S-K DH-AH0 P-AE1 N-AH0 L-EH2 JH-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0 N-IH0-N DH-AH0 S-EH1-K T-ER0 Y-UW1 N-OW1 F-AO1-R F-AH0 N-AE1-N S-AH0-N-D


case in point, we had our atm shut down. the dia asked us for an audit and i thought-

K-EY1 S-IH0-N P-OY1-N T-W-IY1 HH-AE1 D-AW1 ER0 AE1-T-M SH-AH1-T D-AW1-N DH-AH0 D-IY1 AH0 AE1-S-K T-AH1-S F-AO1 R-AE1 N-AO1 D-IH0 T-AH0-N D-AY1 TH-AO1-T


we educate the people that are trying to regulate, or just trying to understand.

W-IY1 EH1 JH-AH0 K-EY2-T DH-AH0 P-IY1 P-AH0-L DH-AE1 T-AA1-R T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 R-EH1 G-Y-AH0 L-EY2 T-AO1-R JH-AH1-S-T T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 AH2-N D-ER0-S T-AE1-N-D


take that, you want to watch? in the states, there are organizations that are working on that. there's the digital currency council.

T-EY1-K DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 W-AA1 CH-IH0-N DH-AH0-S T-EY1-T-S DH-EH1 R-AA1 R-AO2-R G-AH0 N-AH0 Z-EY1 SH-AH0-N-Z DH-AE1 T-AA1 R-W-ER1 K-IH0 NG-AA1-N DH-AE1-T DH-EH1-R-Z DH-AH0 D-IH1 JH-AH0 T-AH0-L K-ER1 AH0-N S-IY0 K-AW1-N S-AH0-L


they're based in new york. and they're aimed at helping professionals like lawyers, ras, financial advisors-

TH-EH1-R B-EY1-S T-IH0-N N-UW1 Y-AO1-R K-AH0-N-D TH-EH1 R-EY1-M D-AE1-T HH-EH1-L P-IH0-NG P-R-AH0 F-EH1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-L Z-L-AY1 K-L-AO1 Y-ER0 Z-R-AE1-S F-AH0 N-AE1-N SH-AH0 L-AE0-D V-AY1 Z-ER0-Z


to actually learn about bitcoin and become certified.

T-UW1 AE1-K CH-AH0 W-AH0 L-IY0 L-ER1 N-AH0 B-AW1-T B-IH1-T K-AH0 N-AH0-N-D B-IH0 K-AH1-M S-ER1 T-AH0 F-AY2-D


i think their biggest issue is they've only been around a few months and who recognized that? who recognizes that certification? they have to start somewhere.

AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K DH-EH1-R B-IH1 G-AH0-S T-IH1 SH-UW0 IH1-Z DH-EY1 V-OW1 N-L-IY0 B-IH1 N-ER0 AW1-N D-AH0 F-Y-UW1 M-AH1-N-TH S-AH0-N-D HH-UW1 R-EH1 K-AH0 G-N-AY2-Z-D DH-AE1-T HH-UW1 R-EH1 K-AH0 G-N-AY2 Z-AH0-Z DH-AE1-T S-ER2 T-AH0 F-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0-N DH-EY1 HH-AE1-V T-UW1-S T-AA1-R-T S-AH1 M-W-EH2-R


probably not a good, a good model cyprus.

P-R-AA1 B-AH0 B-L-IY0 N-AA1 T-AH0 G-UH1 D-AH0 G-UH1 D-M-AA1 D-AH0-L S-AY1 P-R-AH0-S


i think you can do it online, but you know, there may be a residency requirement,

AY1 TH-IH1-NG K-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N D-UW1 IH1 T-AO1 N-L-AY2-N B-AH1 T-Y-UW1 N-OW1 DH-EH1-R M-EY1 B-IY1 AH0 R-EH1 Z-IH0 D-AH0-N S-IY0 R-IH0 K-W-AY1-R M-AH0-N-T


look, i'd just like to thank all of our panelists for a great discussion. so can i ask you all to thank-

L-UH1 K-IH1-D JH-AH1-S T-L-AY1-K T-UW1 TH-AE1-NG K-AO1 L-AH1 V-AW1 ER0 P-AE1 N-AH0 L-IH0-S-T-S F-AO1 R-AH0 G-R-EY1-T D-IH0-S K-AH1 SH-AH0-N S-OW1 K-AE1 N-AY1 AE1-S K-Y-UW1 AO1-L T-UW1 TH-AE1-NG-K


stolen? yeah, just the geordie's. and so if you don't know when i'm sure you do, because half of you are performing this is tragic.

S-T-OW1 L-AH0 N-Y-AE1 JH-AH1-S-T DH-AH0 JH-AO1-R D-IY0 Z-AH0-N-D S-OW1 IH1 F-Y-UW1 D-AA1-N T-N-OW1 W-EH1 N-IH1-M SH-UH1 R-Y-UW1 D-UW1 B-IH0 K-AO1-Z HH-AE1 F-AH1 V-Y-UW1 AA1-R P-ER0 F-AO1-R M-IH0-NG DH-IH1 S-IH1-Z T-R-AE1 JH-IH0-K


jibber an amalgamation of standup tragedy and jibber-jabber.

JH-IH1 B-ER0 AE1 N-AH0 M-AE2-L G-AH0 M-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH1-V-S T-AE1-N D-AH2-P T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 AH0-N-D JH-IH1 B-ER0 JH-AE2 B-ER0


i hope none of you have any tragedy in your lives at the moment. anybody got any tragedy?

AY1 HH-OW1 P-N-AH1 N-AH1 V-Y-UW1 HH-AE1 V-EH1 N-IY0 T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 IH0 N-Y-AO1-R L-IH1-V Z-AE1-T DH-AH0 M-OW1 M-AH0-N T-EH1 N-IY0 B-AH0 D-IY0 G-AA1 T-EH1 N-IY0 T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0


yeah.oh, rowan well i hope you haven't but you will have, by the end of the night.

Y-IY1 HH-UW0 R-OW1 AH0 N-W-EH1 L-AY1 HH-OW1 P-Y-UW1 HH-AE1 V-AH0-N-T B-AH1 T-Y-UW1 W-IH1-L HH-AE1-V B-AY1 DH-AH0 EH1-N D-AH1-V DH-AH0 N-AY1-T


you'll have tragedy in abundance by the end of the show.

Y-UW1-L HH-AE1-V T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 IH0 N-AH0 B-AH1-N D-AH0-N-S B-AY1 DH-AH0 EH1-N D-AH1-V DH-AH0 SH-OW1


yes. cause that's what we want. that's what we want for a monday night in edinburgh's night, isn't it?

Y-EH1-S K-AA1-Z TH-AE1-T S-W-AH1 T-W-IY1 W-AA1-N-T TH-AE1-T S-W-AH1 T-W-IY1 W-AA1-N-T F-AO1 R-AH0 M-AH1-N D-IY0 N-AY1 T-IH0 N-EH1 D-AH0-N B-ER0 Z-N-AY1 T-IH1 S-AH0-N T-IH1-T


yes, okay. so it will also be a podcast and you can check the podcast.

Y-EH1 S-OW2 K-EY1 S-OW1 IH1 T-W-IH1 L-AO1-L S-OW0 B-IY1 AH0 P-OW1-D K-AE2-S T-AH0-N D-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N CH-EH1-K DH-AH0 P-OW1-D K-AE2-S-T


online afterwards at standuptragedy.co.uk.

AO1 N-L-AY2 N-AE1-F T-ER0 W-ER0-D Z-AE1-T-S T-AE0-N D-AH1 P-R-IY0 T-AH2 K-Y-IH0-NG


i believe. yes. got it. check me out. i can remember things.

AY1 B-IH0 L-IY1 V-Y-EH1-S G-AA1 T-IH1-T CH-EH1 K-M-IY1 AW1 T-AY1 K-AE1 N-R-IH0 M-EH1-M B-ER0 TH-IH1-NG-Z


i'm a poet and that's what we do. okay.

IH1 M-AH0 P-OW1 AH0 T-AH0-N-D TH-AE1-T S-W-AH1 T-W-IY1 D-UW1 OW2 K-EY1


yes.that, that cartoon character who had devious plots to kill the roadrunner by buying ridiculous inventions from a company called acme.

Y-EH1-S T-AH0-TH DH-AE1-T K-AA0-R T-UW1-N K-EH1 R-IH0-K T-ER0 HH-UW1 HH-AE1-D D-IY1 V-IY0 AH0-S P-L-AA1-T-S T-UW1 K-IH1-L DH-AH0 R-OW1 D-R-AH2 N-ER0 B-AY1 B-AY1 IH0 NG-R-IH0 D-IH1 K-Y-AH0 L-AH0 S-IH0-N V-EH1-N SH-AH0-N-Z F-R-AH1 M-AH0 K-AH1-M P-AH0 N-IY0 K-AO1-L D-AE1 K-M-IY0


just in case nobody did know at the back and they just didn't want to say anything and look silly. so this is an account of his therapy session.

JH-AH1-S T-IH0-N K-EY1 S-N-OW1 B-AA2 D-IY2 D-IH1 D-N-OW1 AE1-T DH-AH0 B-AE1 K-AH0-N-D DH-EY1 JH-AH1-S-T D-IH1 D-AH0-N T-W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 S-EY1 EH1 N-IY0 TH-IH2 NG-AH0-N D-L-UH1-K S-IH1 L-IY0 S-OW1 DH-IH1 S-IH1 Z-AE1 N-AH0 K-AW1-N T-AH1-V HH-IH1-Z TH-EH1 R-AH0 P-IY0 S-EH1 SH-AH0-N


because even cartoon characters end up in therapy and surprisingly, he's got a northeast female accent who would have thought.

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IY1 V-IH0-N K-AA0-R T-UW1-N K-AE1 R-IH0-K T-ER0 Z-EH1-N D-AH1 P-IH0-N TH-EH1 R-AH0 P-IY0 AH0-N-D S-ER0 P-R-AY1 Z-IH0 NG-L-IY0 HH-IY1-Z G-AA1 T-AH0 N-AO2-R TH-IY1-S-T F-IY1 M-EY2 L-AE1-K S-EH2-N-T HH-UW1 W-UH1-D HH-AE1-V TH-AO1-T


i see, how does that make me feel? i dunno, i bit flat really.

AY1 S-IY1 HH-AW1 D-AH1-Z DH-AE1 T-M-EY1 K-M-IY1 F-IY1 L-AY1 D-AH0 N-OW1 AY1 B-IH1-T F-L-AE1 T-R-IH1 L-IY0


i'm nearly 64 could have done so much more.

AY1 AE1-M N-IH1-R L-IY0 S-IH1-K-S T-IY0 F-AO1-R K-UH1-D HH-AE1-V D-AH1-N S-OW1 M-AH1 CH-M-AO1-R


i'll admit my attempts to showcase my ingenuity didn't go too well.

IH1 L-AH0 D-M-IH1 T-M-AY1 AH0 T-EH1-M-P-T-S T-UW1 SH-OW1 K-EY2 S-M-AY1 IH0-N JH-AH0 N-UW1 AH0 T-IY0 D-IH1 D-AH0-N-T G-OW1 T-UW1 W-EH1-L


i went through hell, no one saw the menial jobs.

AY1 W-EH1-N-T TH-R-UW1 HH-EH1-L N-OW1 W-AH1-N S-AO1 DH-AH0 M-IY1 N-IY0 AH0-L JH-AA1-B-Z


i had to do, minimum wage to fund those fanatical follies.

AY1 HH-AE1-D T-UW1 D-UW1 M-IH1 N-AH0 M-AH0 M-W-EY1-JH T-UW1 F-AH1-N-D DH-OW1-Z F-AH0 N-AE1 T-IH0 K-AH0-L F-AA1 L-IY0-Z


it's jolly well embarrassing with all that money.

IH1-T-S JH-AA1 L-IY0 W-EH1 L-IH0-M B-EH1 R-AH0 S-IH0 NG-W-IH1 DH-AO1-L DH-AE1 T-M-AH1 N-IY0


i could have eaten in edinburgh every night and fancy restaurants and shite.

AY1 K-UH1-D HH-AE1 V-IY1 T-AH0 N-IH0 N-EH1 D-AH0-N B-ER0 OW0 EH1 V-ER0 IY0 N-AY1 T-AH0-N-D F-AE1-N S-IY0 R-EH1-S T-ER0 AA2-N-T S-AH0-N-D SH-AY1-T


feel like i've wasted my life. missed out on opportunities to visit new countries.

F-IY1-L L-AY1 K-AY1 V-W-EY1-S T-AH0 D-M-AY1 L-AY1 F-M-IH1-S T-AW1 T-AA1 N-AA2 P-ER0 T-UW1 N-AH0 T-IY0-Z T-UW1 V-IH1 Z-AH0 T-N-UW1 K-AH1-N T-R-IY0-Z


get me a wife or, learnt to play clarinet.

G-EH1 T-M-IY1 AH0 W-AY1 F-AO1-R L-ER1-N-T T-UW1 P-L-EY1 K-L-EH2 R-AH0 N-EH1-T


since i got the internet,

S-IH1-N S-AY1 G-AA1-T DH-AH0 IH1-N T-ER0 N-EH2-T


i hooked up with match.com to make some new friends.

AY1 HH-UH1-K T-AH1 P-W-IH1 DH-M-AE1-CH K-AA2-M T-UW1 M-EY1-K S-AH1-M N-UW1 F-R-EH1-N-D-Z


i thought about twitter and myspacebook, god-

AY1 TH-AO1 T-AH0 B-AW1-T T-W-IH1 T-ER0 AH0-N D-M-IH0-S P-EY1-S K-AH0 B-UW2-P G-AA1-D


even i knew better than that. i've had emails from acme back in me to go back.

IY1 V-IH0 N-AY1 N-UW1 B-EH1 T-ER0 DH-AE1-N DH-AE1 T-AY1-V HH-AE1 D-IY0 M-EY1-L-Z F-R-AH1 M-AE1 K-M-IY0 B-AE1 K-IH0-N M-IY1 T-UW1 G-OW1 B-AE1-K


i've only had one tweet. it read simply, "meep meep".

AY1 V-OW1 N-L-IY0 HH-AE1 D-W-AH1-N T-W-IY1 T-IH1 T-R-IY1-D S-IH1-M P-L-IY0 M-IY1 P-M-IY1-P


do you know what i find really, really, really tragic as people who don't like spoken words.

D-UW1 Y-UW1 N-OW1 W-AH1 T-AY1 F-AY1-N D-R-IH1 L-IY0 R-IH1 L-IY0 R-IH1 L-IY0 T-R-AE1 JH-IH0 K-AE1-Z P-IY1 P-AH0-L HH-UW1 D-AA1-N T-L-AY1-K-S P-OW1 K-AH0 N-W-ER1-D-Z


some mate of oppenheimer maths explains that what you don't already know in the simplest terms when poetry does well-

S-AH1-M M-EY1 T-AH1 V-AA1 P-AH0-N HH-AY2 M-ER0 M-AE1-TH S-IH0-K-S P-L-EY1-N-Z DH-AE1 T-W-AH1 T-Y-UW1 D-AA1-N T-AO0-L R-EH1 D-IY0 N-OW1 IH0-N DH-AH0 S-IH1-M P-L-AH0-S-T T-ER1-M Z-W-EH1-N P-OW1 AH0 T-R-IY0 D-AH1 Z-W-EH1-L


it's the complete reverse. with a flick of her hair she bares a grin almost as smug as nick's.

IH1-T-S DH-AH0 K-AH0-M P-L-IY1 T-R-IH0 V-ER1 S-W-IH1 DH-AH0 F-L-IH1 K-AH1-V HH-ER0 HH-EH1-R SH-IY1 B-EH1-R Z-AH0 G-R-IH1 N-AO1-L M-OW2-S T-AE1-Z S-M-AH1 G-AE1 Z-N-IH1-K-S


dense frustration, silently fuming in dictionary corner before the smalltalk dissipated and the atmosphere, grew a little warmer.

D-EH1-N-S F-R-AH0-S T-R-EY1 SH-AH0-N S-AY1 L-AH0-N T-L-IY0 F-Y-UW1 M-IH0 NG-IH0-N D-IH1-K SH-AH0 N-EH2 R-IY0 K-AO1-R N-ER0 B-IH0 F-AO1-R DH-AH0 S-M-AO1-L T-AO2-K D-IH1 S-AH0 P-EY2 T-IH0 D-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 AE1 T-M-AH0-S F-IH2-R G-R-UW1 AH0 L-IH1 T-AH0 L-W-AO1-R M-ER0


and i pitied her as i watched her.

AH0-N D-AY1 P-IH1 T-IY2-D HH-ER0 AE1 Z-AY1 W-AA1-CH-T HH-ER0


never knowing, never caring what the poets could make them say.

N-EH1 V-ER0 N-OW1 IH0-NG N-EH1 V-ER0 K-EH1 R-IH0 NG-W-AH1-T DH-AH0 P-OW1 AH0-T-S K-UH1 D-M-EY1-K DH-EH1-M S-EY1


he's got a show here at the fringe called northeast rising at clark's bar at 1:00 pm.

HH-IY1-Z G-AA1 T-AH0 SH-OW1 HH-IY1 R-AE1-T DH-AH0 F-R-IH1-N-JH K-AO1-L D-N-AO2-R TH-IY1-S T-R-AY1 Z-IH0 NG-AE1-T K-L-AA1-R-K-S B-AA1 R-AE1 T-W-AH1-N P-IY1 EH1-M


go to it, go to it every single day. cause it's amazing.

G-OW1 T-UW1 IH1-T G-OW1 T-UW1 IH1 T-EH1 V-ER0 IY0 S-IH1-NG G-AH0-L D-EY1 K-AA1 Z-IH1-T S-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0-NG


he's also my housemate at the minute. so i have to plug his show. so keep him-

HH-IY1 Z-AO1-L S-OW0 M-AY1 HH-AW1 S-M-EY2 T-AE1-T DH-AH0 M-IH1 N-AH0-T S-OW1 AY1 HH-AE1-V T-UW1 P-L-AH1-G HH-IH1-Z SH-OW1 S-OW1 K-IY1-P HH-IH1-M


which lots of people have talked to us while i've been flyering, it's impossible.

W-IH1 CH-L-AA1-T S-AH1-V P-IY1 P-AH0-L HH-AE1-V T-AO1-K-T T-UW1 AH1 S-W-AY1 L-AY1-V B-IH1-N F-L-AY1 ER0 IH0 NG-IH1-T S-IH0-M P-AA1 S-AH0 B-AH0-L


so i've been saying, you know, come and i'll try and prove you wrong. i'm going to start with going about

S-OW1 AY1-V B-IH1-N S-EY1 IH0 NG-Y-UW1 N-OW1 K-AH1 M-AH0-N D-IH1-L T-R-AY1 AH0-N-D P-R-UW1 V-Y-UW1 R-AO1 NG-IH1-M G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1-S T-AA1-R T-W-IH1-DH G-OW1 IH0 NG-AH0 B-AW1-T


about a venue that i used to love going to back home. and it was a bit like here, the banshee labyrinth actually it was a really old building, like really, really old, but it used to get used-

AH0 B-AW1 T-AH0 V-EH1 N-Y-UW0 DH-AE1 T-AY1 Y-UW1-Z-D T-UW1 L-AH1-V G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 B-AE1-K HH-OW1 M-AH0-N D-IH1 T-W-AA1 Z-AH0 B-IH1 T-L-AY1-K HH-IY1-R DH-AH0 B-AE0-N SH-IY1 L-AE1 B-ER0 IH2-N TH-AE1-K CH-AH0 W-AH0 L-IY0 IH1 T-W-AA1 Z-AH0 R-IH1 L-IY0 OW1-L-D B-IH1-L D-IH0 NG-L-AY1 K-R-IH1 L-IY0 R-IH1 L-IY0 OW1-L-D B-AH1 T-IH1 T-Y-UW1-S-T T-UW1 G-EH1 T-Y-UW1-Z-D


for lots of nice modern things, you know? and they used to put raves on there, right? it was called the cooperage.

F-AO1-R L-AA1-T S-AH1 V-N-AY1 S-M-AA1 D-ER0-N TH-IH1-NG Z-Y-UW1 N-OW1 AH0-N-D DH-EY1 Y-UW1-S-T T-UW1 P-UH1 T-R-EY1-V Z-AA1-N DH-EH1-R R-AY1 T-IH1 T-W-AA1-Z K-AO1-L-D DH-AH0 K-UW1 P-ER0 AH0-JH


and they had the most amazing raves in this big old kind of ancient building. it's the second oldest building in-

AH0-N-D DH-EY1 HH-AE1-D DH-AH0 M-OW1-S T-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0 NG-R-EY1-V Z-IH0-N DH-IH1-S B-IH1 G-OW1-L-D K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-EY1-N CH-AH0-N-T B-IH1-L D-IH0 NG-IH1-T-S DH-AH0 S-EH1 K-AH0-N D-OW1-L D-AH0-S-T B-IH1-L D-IH0 NG-IH0-N


newcastle. and i wrote this poem as a-

N-UW1 K-AE2 S-AH0 L-AH0-N D-AY1 R-OW1-T DH-IH1-S P-OW1 AH0 M-AE1 Z-AH0


dedication to that. it's called the cooperage, inventively enough, cause that was what it was called. [inaudible 00:08:12] this.

D-EH2 D-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0-N T-UW1 DH-AE1 T-IH1-T-S K-AO1-L-D DH-AH0 K-UW1 P-ER0 AH0 JH-IH0-N V-EH1-N T-IH0 V-L-IY0 IH0 N-AH1-F K-AA1-Z DH-AE1 T-W-AA1 Z-W-AH1 T-IH1 T-W-AA1-Z K-AO1-L D-IH0 N-AO1 D-AH0 B-AH0-L Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0 Z-EY1 T-M-IH1 N-AH0-T S-AH0-N-D T-W-EH1-L-V S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D-Z DH-IH1-S


hundred years ago at its conception that the cooperage will be a venue for ravers to drop pills in.

HH-AH1-N D-R-AH0 D-Y-IH1-R Z-AH0 G-OW1 AE1 T-IH1-T-S K-AH0-N S-EH1-P SH-AH0-N DH-AE1-T DH-AH0 K-UW1 P-ER0 AH0 JH-W-IH1-L B-IY1 AH0 V-EH1 N-Y-UW0 F-AO1-R R-EY1 V-ER0-Z T-UW1 D-R-AA1-P P-IH1-L Z-IH0-N


that is clown-core and-

DH-AE1 T-IH1-Z K-L-AO1-NG K-AO2 R-AH0-N-D


weird, admittedly but as an extra special treat, you got a pound off your entry. if you came dressed like a clown freak, that was their words.

W-IH1-R D-AE0 D-M-IH1 T-IH0 D-L-IY0 B-AH1 T-AE1 Z-AE1 N-EH1-K-S T-R-AH0-S P-EH1 SH-AH0-L T-R-IY1 T-Y-UW1 G-AA1 T-AH0 P-AW1-N D-AO1 F-Y-AO1 R-EH1-N T-R-IY0 IH1 F-Y-UW1 K-EY1-M D-R-EH1-S T-L-AY1 K-AH0 K-L-AW1-N F-R-IY1-K DH-AE1 T-W-AA1-Z DH-EH1 R-W-ER1-D-Z


there was neon hair and baggy pants as far as the eye could see like some dystopian circus.

DH-EH1 R-W-AA1 Z-N-IY1 AA0-N HH-EH1 R-AH0-N-D B-AE1 G-IY0 P-AE1-N-T S-AE1-Z F-AA1 R-AE1-Z DH-AH0 AY1 K-UH1-D S-IY1 L-AY1-K S-AH1-M D-IH0-S T-OW1 P-IY0 AH0-N S-ER1 K-AH0-S


set in 2063, the distorted bass shook the window panes.

S-EH1 T-IH0-N T-W-EH1-N T-IY0 S-IH1-K-S T-IY0 TH-R-IY1 DH-AH0 D-IH0-S T-AO1-R T-AH0-D B-AE1-S SH-UH1-K DH-AH0 W-IH1-N D-OW0 P-EY1-N-Z


so they vibrated about an inch each way.

S-OW1 DH-EY1 V-AY1 B-R-EY0 T-IH0 D-AH0 B-AW1 T-AE1 N-IH1-N CH-IY1 CH-W-EY1


i didn't think they could take that kind of sonic strain in the old age, but it stayed in place.

AY1 D-IH1 D-AH0-N-T TH-IH1-NG-K DH-EY1 K-UH1-D T-EY1-K DH-AE1-T K-AY1-N D-AH1-V S-AA1 N-IH0-K-S T-R-EY1 N-IH0-N DH-AH0 OW1-L D-EY1-JH B-AH1 T-IH1-T-S T-EY1 D-IH0-N P-L-EY1-S


just wobbling, holographic.

JH-AH1-S T-W-AA1 B-AH0 L-IH0-NG HH-AA2 L-AH0 G-R-AE1 F-IH0-K


like a hummingbird.


tractor on a whiz.


clowns, everywhere that danced under the moon, clowns, clowns everywhere, but no-

K-L-AW1-N Z-EH1 V-R-IY0 W-EH2-R DH-AE1-T D-AE1-N-S T-AH1-N D-ER0 DH-AH0 M-UW1-N K-L-AW1-N-Z K-L-AW1-N Z-EH1 V-R-IY0 W-EH2-R B-AH1 T-N-OW1


one had balloons. there was clowns with-

W-AH1-N HH-AE1-D B-AH0 L-UW1-N-Z DH-EH1 R-W-AA1-Z K-L-AW1-N Z-W-IH1-DH


you all right mate? you are sound.

Y-UW1 AO1-L R-AY1 T-M-EY1 T-Y-UW1 AA1-R S-AW1-N-D


have a dream based on one simple fact that the cooperage was there first and the cooperage was going to be their last.

HH-AE1 V-AH0 D-R-IY1-M B-EY1-S T-AA1 N-W-AH1-N S-IH1-M P-AH0-L F-AE1-K-T DH-AE1-T DH-AH0 K-UW1 P-ER0 AH0 JH-W-AA1-Z DH-EH1-R F-ER1-S T-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 K-UW1 P-ER0 AH0 JH-W-AA1-Z G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 B-IY1 DH-EH1-R L-AE1-S-T


i dream of a day when the arseholes have moved away.

AY1 D-R-IY1 M-AH1 V-AH0 D-EY1 W-EH1-N DH-AH0 AA1-R-S HH-OW2-L-Z HH-AE1 V-M-UW1-V D-AH0 W-EY1


some way our souls are meant to stay like mars.

S-AH1 M-W-EY1 AW1 ER0 S-OW1-L Z-AA1-R M-EH1-N-T T-UW1-S T-EY1 L-AY1 K-M-AA1-R-Z


on the countrysides.


where they can complain to the local authority about the sun rising too early, or the excessive amount of stars in the night sky.

W-EH1-R DH-EY1 K-AE1-N K-AH0-M P-L-EY1-N T-UW1 DH-AH0 L-OW1 K-AH0 L-AH0 TH-AO1 R-AH0 T-IY0 AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AH0 S-AH1 N-R-AY1 Z-IH0-NG T-UW1 ER1 L-IY0 AO1-R DH-AH0 IH0-K S-EH1 S-IH0 V-AH0 M-AW1-N T-AH1-V-S T-AA1-R Z-IH0-N DH-AH0 N-AY1-T-S K-AY1


get replaced and the mad rhythms echo in the valleys around, as they send back the wide-eyed, sweaty...

G-EH1 T-R-IY2 P-L-EY1-S T-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 M-AE1 D-R-IH1 DH-AH0-M Z-EH1 K-OW0 IH0-N DH-AH0 V-AE1 L-IY0 Z-ER0 AW1-N D-AE1-Z DH-EY1 S-EH1-N-D B-AE1-K DH-AH0 W-AY1 D-IY2-D S-W-EH1 T-IY0


freaky dancing clowns.

F-R-IY1 K-IY0 D-AE1-N S-IH0-NG K-L-AW1-N-Z


guys, so as well as being a poet, i am also a vegetarian.

G-AY1-Z S-OW1 AE1 Z-W-EH1 L-AE1-Z B-IY1 IH0 NG-AH0 P-OW1 AH0 T-AY1 AE1 M-AO1-L S-OW0 AH0 V-EH2 JH-AH0 T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0-N


yes, tom you're vegetarian, aren't you? hands up if you're a vegetarian, let's see if i can count in this crazy light. yeah, we got quite a few, right? i don't know if this happens to you.

Y-EH1-S T-AA1 M-Y-UH1-R V-EH2 JH-AH0 T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0 N-AA1 R-AH0-N T-Y-UW1 HH-AE1-N-D Z-AH1 P-IH1 F-Y-UH1 R-AH0 V-EH2 JH-AH0 T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0 N-L-EH1-T-S S-IY1 IH1 F-AY1 K-AE1-N K-AW1-N T-IH0-N DH-IH1-S K-R-EY1 Z-IY0 L-AY1 T-Y-AE1 W-IY1 G-AA1-T K-W-AY1 T-AH0 F-Y-UW1 R-AY1 T-AY1 D-AA1-N T-N-OW1 IH1-F DH-IH1-S HH-AE1 P-AH0-N-Z T-UW1 Y-UW1


tell them you're a vegetarian and one of them is that you're doing it because just for the sole reason that you kind of love all animals, and you want to give them a great big.

T-EH1-L DH-EH1 M-Y-UH1 R-AH0 V-EH2 JH-AH0 T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0 N-AH0-N D-W-AH1 N-AH1-V DH-EH1 M-IH1-Z DH-AE1 T-Y-UH1-R D-UW1 IH0 NG-IH1-T B-IH0 K-AO1-Z JH-AH1-S-T F-AO1-R DH-AH0 S-OW1-L R-IY1 Z-AH0-N DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-L-AH1 V-AO1 L-AE1 N-AH0 M-AH0-L Z-AH0-N D-Y-UW1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 G-IH1-V DH-EH1 M-AH0 G-R-EY1-T B-IH1-G


animals that i hate with a passion. it goes like this.

AE1 N-AH0 M-AH0-L-Z DH-AE1 T-AY1 HH-EY1 T-W-IH1 DH-AH0 P-AE1 SH-AH0 N-IH1-T G-OW1 Z-L-AY1-K DH-IH1-S


every day afraid of metropolitan seagulls.

EH1 V-ER0 IY0 D-EY1 AH0 F-R-EY1 D-AH1 V-M-EH2 T-R-AH0 P-AA1 L-AH0 T-AH0-N S-IY1 G-AH2-L-Z


they're not those nice ones from your childhood at the beach.

TH-EH1-R N-AA1-T DH-OW1 Z-N-AY1 S-W-AH1-N-Z F-R-AH1 M-Y-AO1-R CH-AY1-L-D HH-UH2 D-AE1-T DH-AH0 B-IY1-CH


they don't swoop past idyllic sand castles, or hover around ice cream vans.

DH-EY1 D-AA1-N-T S-W-UW1-P P-AE1-S T-AY0 D-IH1 L-IH0-K S-AE1-N-D K-AE1 S-AH0-L Z-AO1-R HH-AH1 V-ER0 ER0 AW1-N D-AY1-S K-R-IY1-M V-AE1-N-Z


they're looking for sun-dried panini's, chicken caesar salads.

TH-EH1-R L-UH1 K-IH0-NG F-AO1-R S-AH1-N D-R-IY0-D P-AE1 N-AH0 N-IY0-Z CH-IH1 K-AH0-N S-IY1 Z-ER0 S-AE1 L-AH0-D-Z


you get sick of looking over your shoulder. you decide not to go back to that square of town anymore because you're scared, you're scared of the cultured seagulls.

Y-UW1 G-EH1-T S-IH1 K-AH1 V-L-UH1 K-IH0 NG-OW1 V-ER0 Y-AO1-R SH-OW1-L D-ER0 Y-UW1 D-IH0 S-AY1 D-N-AA1-T T-UW1 G-OW1 B-AE1-K T-UW1 DH-AE1-T-S K-W-EH1 R-AH1-V T-AW1 N-EH2 N-IY0 M-AO1-R B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-Y-UH1-R-S K-EH1-R D-Y-UH1-R-S K-EH1-R D-AH1-V DH-AH0 K-AH1-L CH-ER0-D S-IY1 G-AH2-L-Z


[inaudible 00:01:54] outside the jazz clubs, chewing on...

IH0 N-AO1 D-AH0 B-AH0-L Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0 Z-W-AH1-N M-IH1 N-AH0 T-AH0-N-D F-IH1-F T-IY0 F-AO1-R S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D Z-AW1-T S-AY1-D DH-AH0 JH-AE1-Z K-L-AH1-B-Z CH-UW1 IH0 NG-AA1-N


vogue cigarette butts, menacingly dancing to charles mingus.

V-OW1-G S-IH2 G-ER0 EH1-T B-AH1-T S-M-EH1 N-AH0 S-IH0 NG-L-IY0 D-AE1-N S-IH0-NG T-UW1 CH-AA1-R-L Z-M-IH1-NG G-IH0-S


thai green curry, they want belgian waffles.

T-AY1 G-R-IY1-N K-AH1 R-IY0 DH-EY1 W-AA1-N-T B-EH1-L JH-AH0 N-W-AA1 F-AH0-L-Z


and nests are made out of realist novels and clippings from the guardian.

AH0-N D-N-EH1-S-T S-AA1-R M-EY1 D-AW1 T-AH1 V-R-IY1 L-IH0-S T-N-AA1 V-AH0-L Z-AH0-N-D K-L-IH1 P-IH0-NG-Z F-R-AH1-M DH-AH0 G-AA1-R D-IY0 AH0-N


call the noise patrol, right? but, you can't.

K-AO1-L DH-AH0 N-OY1-Z P-AH0 T-R-OW1-L R-AY1-T B-AH1 T-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N-T


as jenny said, 1:00 to 2:00 pm every day at clark's bar. i'm trying to prove geordie's aren't thick, i would love to see you there. thanks very much for listening, cheers.

AE1-Z JH-EH1 N-IY0 S-EH1 D-W-AH1 N-AH0 K-L-AA1-K T-UW1 T-UW1 P-IY1 EH1 M-EH1 V-ER0 IY0 D-EY1 AE1-T K-L-AA1-R-K-S B-AA1 R-AY1 AE1-M T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 P-R-UW1-V JH-AO1-R D-IY0 Z-AA1 R-AH0-N-T TH-IH1 K-AY1 W-UH1 D-L-AH1-V T-UW1 S-IY1 Y-UW1 DH-EH1-R TH-AE1-NG-K-S V-EH1 R-IY0 M-AH1-CH F-AO1-R L-IH1 S-AH0 N-IH0-NG CH-IH1-R-Z


the [inaudible 00:02:37] guy, who really needed a fleece.

DH-AH0 IH0 N-AO1 D-AH0 B-AH0-L Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0-Z T-UW1 M-IH1 N-AH0-T S-AH0-N-D TH-ER1 D-IY0 S-EH1 V-AH0-N S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D-Z G-AY1 HH-UW1 R-IH1 L-IY0 N-IY1 D-AH0 D-AH0 F-L-IY1-S


since the tune was included in the west end version...

S-IH1-N-S DH-AH0 T-UW1 N-W-AA1 Z-IH0-N K-L-UW1 D-AH0 D-IH0-N DH-AH0 W-EH1-S T-EH1-N-D V-ER1 ZH-AH0-N


i can only assume he must've been, to me in the meantime, and would feel insincere if he continued to sing about it.

AY1 K-AE1 N-OW1 N-L-IY0 AH0 S-UW1-M HH-IY1 M-AH1-S-T V-IH0 B-IH1-N T-UW1 M-IY1 IH0-N DH-AH0 M-IY1-N T-AY2 M-AH0-N D-W-UH1-D F-IY1 L-IH2-N S-IH0-N S-IH1 R-IH1-F HH-IY1 K-AH0-N T-IH1 N-Y-UW0-D T-UW1 S-IH1 NG-AH0 B-AW1 T-IH1-T


bang into it. it's called...

B-AE1 NG-IH0-N T-UW1 IH1 T-IH1-T-S K-AO1-L-D


cougar. i went clubbing, i used to.

K-UW1 G-ER0 AY1 W-EH1-N-T K-L-AH1 B-IH0 NG-AY1 Y-UW1-Z-D T-UW1


and then, i haven't been out in a while because i got married and had a baby, and moved out the city.

AH0-N-D DH-EH1 N-AY1 HH-AE1 V-AH0-N-T B-IH1 N-AW1 T-IH0 N-AH0 W-AY1-L B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AY1 G-AA1 T-M-EH1 R-IY0 D-AH0-N-D HH-AE1 D-AH0 B-EY1 B-IY0 AH0-N D-M-UW1-V D-AW1-T DH-AH0 S-IH1 T-IY0


you skid marked yourself over here, given it all that.

Y-UW1-S K-IH1 D-M-AA1-R-K T-Y-ER0 S-EH1-L F-OW1 V-ER0 HH-IY1-R G-IH1 V-AH0 N-IH1 T-AO1-L DH-AE1-T


and before i finished this drink, i'll impart a little advice.

AH0-N-D B-IH0 F-AO1 R-AY1 F-IH1 N-IH0-SH-T DH-IH1-S D-R-IH1-NG K-IH1 L-IH0-M P-AA1-R T-AH0 L-IH1 T-AH0 L-AE0-D V-AY1-S


it's my city and it's my night, so take your freshest attitude and that awful stench of links.

IH1-T S-M-AY1 S-IH1 T-IY0 AH0-N D-IH1-T S-M-AY1 N-AY1-T S-OW1 T-EY1 K-Y-AO1-R F-R-EH1 SH-AH0-S T-AE1 T-AH0 T-UW2 D-AH0-N-D DH-AE1 T-AA1 F-AH0-L-S T-EH1-N CH-AH1 V-L-IH1-NG-K-S


your horrible rippy t-shirt and your herbal highs that you bought with your bag of chips, and get the fuck away from before i...

Y-AO1-R HH-AO1 R-AH0 B-AH0-L R-IH1 P-IY0 SH-ER1 T-AH0-N D-Y-AO1 R-ER1 B-AH0-L HH-AY1-Z DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 B-AA1 T-W-IH1 DH-Y-AO1-R B-AE1 G-AH1-V CH-IH1-P S-AH0-N-D G-EH1-T DH-AH0 F-AH1 K-AH0 W-EY1 F-R-AH1-M B-IH0 F-AO1 R-AY1


deck you one. i'll destroy you little man, you'll be on the next train home, now go on.

D-EH1 K-Y-UW1 W-AH1 N-IH1-L D-IH0-S T-R-OY1 Y-UW1 L-IH1 T-AH0-L M-AE1 N-Y-UW1-L B-IY1 AA1-N DH-AH0 N-EH1-K-S-T T-R-EY1-N HH-OW1-M N-AW1 G-OW1 AA1-N


you're lucky, 'cause if me drink wasn't so nice i'll fucking at swill you. thank you. i'm a little bit aggressive when i'm...

Y-UH1-R L-AH1 K-IY0 K-AA1 Z-IH1 F-M-IY1 D-R-IH1-NG K-W-AO1-S-T S-OW1 N-AY1 S-IH1-L F-AH1 K-IH0 NG-AE1-T S-W-IH1 L-Y-UW1 TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 IH1 M-AH0 L-IH1 T-AH0-L B-IH1 T-AH0 G-R-EH1 S-IH0 V-W-EH1 N-IH1-M


woo.i know, i went on a bit of a writing frenzy.

W-UW1 IY0 N-OW1 AY1 W-EH1-N T-AA1 N-AH0 B-IH1 T-AH1 V-AH0 R-AY1 T-IH0-NG F-R-EH1-N Z-IY0


i was thinking about one night stands.

AY1 W-AA1-Z TH-IH1-NG K-IH0 NG-AH0 B-AW1 T-W-AH1-N N-AY1-T-S T-AE1-N-D-Z


i like him, i used to like him because i'm married. oh, i'm not wearing my ring.

AY1 L-AY1-K HH-IH1 M-AY1 Y-UW1-Z-D T-UW1 L-AY1-K HH-IH1-M B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1-M M-EH1 R-IY0 D-OW1 IH1-M N-AA1 T-W-EH1 R-IH0-NG M-AY1 R-IH1-NG


but yes i did.


but there's this thing, i'm reading a book it's called black sheep.

B-AH1-T DH-EH1-R-Z DH-IH1-S TH-IH1 NG-IH1 M-R-EH1 D-IH0 NG-AH0 B-UH1 K-IH1-T-S K-AO1-L-D B-L-AE1-K SH-IY1-P


they done it, there's a very brief moment...

DH-EY1 D-AH1 N-IH1-T DH-EH1-R Z-AH0 V-EH1 R-IY0 B-R-IY1 F-M-OW1 M-AH0-N-T


and you kind of do it then, and then he jumps up and he goes right, there's your trousers...

AH0-N D-Y-UW1 K-AY1-N D-AH1-V D-UW1 IH1-T DH-EH1 N-AH0-N-D DH-EH1-N HH-IY1 JH-AH1-M-P S-AH1 P-AH0-N-D HH-IY1 G-OW1 Z-R-AY1-T DH-EH1-R Z-Y-AO1-R T-R-AW1 Z-ER0-Z


your pants, and then he kind of just stands and watch as she get ready.

Y-AO1-R P-AE1-N-T S-AH0-N-D DH-EH1-N HH-IY1 K-AY1-N D-AH1-V JH-AH1-S-T-S T-AE1-N-D Z-AH0-N D-W-AA1 CH-AE1-Z SH-IY1 G-EH1 T-R-EH1 D-IY0


had a really nice night. yeah, and i just...

HH-AE1 D-AH0 R-IH1 L-IY0 N-AY1 S-N-AY1 T-Y-AE1 AH0-N D-AY1 JH-AH1-S-T


awkward goodbye is far worse than an awkward hello. i have to go.

AA1 K-W-ER0-D G-UH2-D B-AY1 IH1-Z F-AA1 R-W-ER1-S DH-AE1 N-AE1 N-AA1 K-W-ER0-D HH-AH0 L-OW1 AY1 HH-AE1-V T-UW1 G-OW1


but if you asked us to, i totes would.

B-AH1 T-IH1 F-Y-UW1 AE1-S-K T-AH1-S T-UW1 AY1 T-OW1-T S-W-UH1-D


i don't like things being put on children, on young people. and i think sometimes when you come from that sort of family...

AY1 D-AA1-N T-L-AY1-K TH-IH1-NG-Z B-IY1 IH0-NG P-UH1 T-AA1-N CH-IH1-L D-R-AH0 N-AA1 N-Y-AH1-NG P-IY1 P-AH0 L-AH0-N D-AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K S-AH0-M T-AY1-M Z-W-EH1 N-Y-UW1 K-AH1-M F-R-AH1-M DH-AE1-T S-AO1-R T-AH1-V F-AE1 M-AH0 L-IY0


they can say things. and someone recently said something about my son and went, he'll end up in prison.

DH-EY1 K-AE1-N S-EY1 TH-IH1-NG Z-AH0-N-D S-AH1 M-W-AH2 N-R-IY1 S-AH0-N T-L-IY0 S-EH1-D S-AH1-M TH-IH0 NG-AH0 B-AW1 T-M-AY1 S-AH1 N-AH0-N D-W-EH1-N-T HH-EH1 L-EH1-N D-AH1 P-IH0-N P-R-IH1 Z-AH0-N


so yeah, i wrote this it's called out, i told you so.

S-OW1 Y-AE1 AY1 R-OW1-T DH-IH1 S-IH1-T-S K-AO1-L D-AW1 T-AY1 T-OW1-L D-Y-UW1 S-OW1


yes, she'll end up in prison.

Y-EH1-S SH-EH1 L-EH1-N D-AH1 P-IH0-N P-R-IH1 Z-AH0-N


we'd call it nature versus nurture trapped in a system of a negative behavior.

W-EH1-D K-AO1 L-IH1 T-N-EY1 CH-ER0 V-ER1 S-AH0 S-N-ER1 CH-ER0 T-R-AE1-P T-IH0 N-AH0 S-IH1-S T-AH0 M-AH1 V-AH0 N-EH1 G-AH0 T-IH0-V B-IH0 HH-EY1 V-Y-ER0


it had just proven their point. a self-fulfilling prophecy that you've heard repeated since the day that you were born, baba black sheep.

IH1-T HH-AE1-D JH-AH1-S-T P-R-UW1 V-AH0-N DH-EH1-R P-OY1-N T-AH0 S-EH1-L F-AH1-L F-IH0-NG P-R-AA1 F-AH0 S-IY0 DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1-V HH-ER1 D-R-IH0 P-IY1 T-IH0-D S-IH1-N-S DH-AH0 D-EY1 DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 W-ER0 B-AO1-R-N B-AH1 B-AH0 B-L-AE1-K SH-IY1-P


yes, sir. and it is better...

Y-EH1-S S-ER1 AH0-N D-IH1 T-IH1-Z B-EH1 T-ER0


that's where she's headed, good for nothing.

TH-AE1-T S-W-EH1-R SH-EH1-S HH-EH1 D-AH0-D G-UH1-D F-AO1-R N-AH1 TH-IH0-NG


always in trouble, baba black sheep, she's punished and she's done nothing.

AO1 L-W-EY2 Z-IH0-N T-R-AH1 B-AH0-L B-AH1 B-AH0 B-L-AE1-K SH-IY1-P SH-EH1-S P-AH1 N-IH0-SH T-AH0-N-D SH-EH1-S D-AH1-N N-AH1 TH-IH0-NG


we devised it with women in law new in prison, so they all true stories about women, it's very exciting. please come and...

W-IY1 D-IH0 V-AY1-Z D-IH1 T-W-IH1 DH-W-IH1 M-AH0 N-IH0 N-L-AO1 N-UW1 IH0-N P-R-IH1 Z-AH0-N S-OW1 DH-EY1 AO1-L T-R-UW1-S T-AO1 R-IY0 Z-AH0 B-AW1 T-W-IH1 M-AH0 N-IH1-T-S V-EH1 R-IY0 IH0-K S-AY1 T-IH0-NG P-L-IY1-Z K-AH1 M-AH0-N-D


that is about a change, but not before i do a little poem set in newcastle. do you all know what a charver is?

DH-AE1 T-IH1 Z-AH0 B-AW1 T-AH0 CH-EY1-N-JH B-AH1 T-N-AA1-T B-IH0 F-AO1 R-AY1 D-UW1 AH0 L-IH1 T-AH0-L P-OW1 AH0-M S-EH1 T-IH0-N N-UW1 K-AE2 S-AH0-L D-UW1 Y-UW1 AO1-L N-OW1 W-AH1 T-AH0 CH-AA1-R V-ER0 IH1-Z


it's basically what the rest of the country calls a chav.

IH1-T-S B-EY1 S-IH0 K-L-IY0 W-AH1-T DH-AH0 R-EH1-S T-AH1-V DH-AH0 K-AH1-N T-R-IY0 K-AO1-L Z-AH0 CH-AA1-V


who knows. and this is what so happened.

HH-UW1 N-OW1 Z-AH0-N-D DH-IH1 S-IH1 Z-W-AH1-T S-OW1 HH-AE1 P-AH0-N-D


greg's delight, washed down with smashing slips of sprite and drag, after drag of a fume filled fag.

G-R-EH1-G-Z D-IH0 L-AY1 T-W-AA1-SH-T D-AW1 N-W-IH1-DH S-M-AE1 SH-IH0-NG S-L-IH1-P S-AH1-V-S P-R-AY1 T-AH0-N-D D-R-AE1 G-AE1-F T-ER0 D-R-AE1 G-AH1 V-AH0 F-Y-UW1-M F-IH1-L-D F-AE1-G


bastard twat, it's not my fault.

B-AE1-S T-ER0-D T-W-AA1 T-IH1-T S-N-AA1 T-M-AY1 F-AO1-L-T


i'm a charver. i forgot...

IH1 M-AH0 CH-AA1-R V-ER0 AY1 F-ER0 G-AA1-T


the next bit, i could've been a proper swat once. but when i asked me mom, a buy us some books.

DH-AH0 N-EH1-K-S-T B-IH1 T-AY1 K-UH1 D-AH0-V B-IH1 N-AH0 P-R-AA1 P-ER0 S-W-AA1 T-W-AH1-N-S B-AH1 T-W-EH1 N-AY1 AE1-S-K T-M-IY1 M-AA1 M-AH0 B-AY1 AH1-S S-AH1-M B-UH1-K-S


she said, nah, you've already got one. i tried to explain that the case catalog wasn't really a great...

SH-IY1 S-EH1 D-N-AA1 Y-UW1 V-AO0-L R-EH1 D-IY0 G-AA1 T-W-AH1 N-AY1 T-R-AY1-D T-UW1 IH0-K-S P-L-EY1-N DH-AE1-T DH-AH0 K-EY1-S K-AE1 T-AH0 L-AO0 G-W-AO1-S T-R-IH1 L-IY0 AH0 G-R-EY1-T


read, but my mom just shrugged, rolled her eyes and offered us some of...

R-EH1-D B-AH1 T-M-AY1 M-AA1-M JH-AH1-S-T SH-R-AH1-G D-R-OW1-L-D HH-ER0 AY1 Z-AH0-N D-AO1 F-ER0 D-AH1-S S-AH1 M-AH1-V


our weed. i wanted my life to be better than hers, but whenever i tried to tell her, she just started, turned up the telly and told us to drink...

AW1 ER0 W-IY1 D-AY1 W-AA1-N T-AH0 D-M-AY1 L-AY1-F T-UW1 B-IY1 B-EH1 T-ER0 DH-AE1-N HH-ER0-Z B-AH1 T-W-EH0 N-EH1 V-ER0 AY1 T-R-AY1-D T-UW1 T-EH1-L HH-ER0 SH-IY1 JH-AH1-S-T-S T-AA1-R T-AH0-D T-ER1-N D-AH1-P DH-AH0 T-EH1 L-IY0 AH0-N-D T-OW1-L D-AH1-S T-UW1 D-R-IH1-NG-K


me umbrella. i only skived school on...

M-IY1 AH0-M B-R-EH1 L-AH0 AY1 OW1 N-L-IY0-S K-AY1-V-D-S K-UW1 L-AA1-N


for exams, but the local careers advisor advised that i should be a teenage mom, so...

F-AO1 R-IH0-G Z-AE1-M-Z B-AH1-T DH-AH0 L-OW1 K-AH0-L K-ER0 IH1-R Z-AE0-D V-AY1 Z-ER0 AE0-D V-AY1-Z-D DH-AE1 T-AY1 SH-UH1-D B-IY1 AH0 T-IY1 N-EY2 JH-M-AA1-M S-OW1


it's not my fault i'm a charver. and one day i'll prove all of us, people you mock can get somewhere.

IH1-T S-N-AA1 T-M-AY1 F-AO1-L T-IH1 M-AH0 CH-AA1-R V-ER0 AH0-N D-W-AH1-N D-EY1 IH1-L P-R-UW1 V-AO1 L-AH1 V-AH1-S P-IY1 P-AH0 L-Y-UW1 M-AA1-K K-AE1-N G-EH1-T S-AH1 M-W-EH2-R


i didn't say i was going to try and theme the poems leading into the next act...

AY1 D-IH1 D-AH0-N-T S-EY1 AY1 W-AA1-Z G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 T-R-AY1 AH0-N-D TH-IY1-M DH-AH0 P-OW1 AH0-M Z-L-IY1 D-IH0 NG-IH0-N T-UW1 DH-AH0 N-EH1-K-S T-AE1-K-T


so i need to do something else before i get the next act done. otherwise...

S-OW1 AY1 N-IY1-D T-UW1 D-UW1 S-AH1-M TH-IH0 NG-EH1-L-S B-IH0 F-AO1 R-AY1 G-EH1-T DH-AH0 N-EH1-K-S T-AE1-K-T D-AH1 N-AH1 DH-ER0 W-AY2-Z


well, has anybody seen les mis, fantastic, so you know the story.

W-EH1-L HH-AE1 Z-EH1 N-IY0 B-AH0 D-IY0 S-IY1 N-L-EH1 S-M-IH1-S F-AE0-N T-AE1-S T-IH0-K S-OW1 Y-UW1 N-OW1 DH-AH0-S T-AO1 R-IY0


but some people didn't really want to sit for three hours and hear the whole thing through the medium of song...

B-AH1-T S-AH1-M P-IY1 P-AH0-L D-IH1 D-AH0-N T-R-IH1 L-IY0 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 S-IH1-T F-AO1-R TH-R-IY1 AW1 ER0 Z-AH0-N-D HH-IY1-R DH-AH0 HH-OW1-L TH-IH1-NG TH-R-UW1 DH-AH0 M-IY1 D-IY0 AH0 M-AH1-V S-AO1-NG


sung by gladiator and wolverine and all that. so if anybody didn't know the story...

S-AH1-NG B-AY1 G-L-AE1 D-IY0 EY2 T-ER0 AH0-N D-W-UH2-L V-ER0 IY1 N-AH0-N D-AO1-L DH-AE1-T S-OW1 IH1 F-EH1 N-IY0 B-AH0 D-IY0 D-IH1 D-AH0-N T-N-OW1 DH-AH0-S T-AO1 R-IY0


this is how i would explain it to them in seven seconds.

DH-IH1 S-IH1-Z HH-AW1 AY1 W-UH1 D-IH0-K-S P-L-EY1 N-IH1-T T-UW1 DH-EH1 M-IH0-N S-EH1 V-AH0-N S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D-Z


the beginning in prison because a bloke stole some bread, at the end of the day almost everyone's dead.

DH-AH0 B-IH0 G-IH1 N-IH0 NG-IH0-N P-R-IH1 Z-AH0-N B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AH0 B-L-OW1-K-S T-OW1-L S-AH1-M B-R-EH1 D-AE1-T DH-AH0 EH1-N D-AH1-V DH-AH0 D-EY1 AO1-L M-OW2-S T-EH1 V-R-IY0 OW2 N-IH0-S D-EH1-D


this might take 30 seconds to set up, so talk among yourselves. so how's this weather we've been having?

DH-IH1 S-M-AY1-T T-EY1-K TH-ER1 D-IY0 S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D-Z T-UW1 S-EH1 T-AH1-P S-OW1 T-AO1 K-AH0 M-AH1 NG-Y-UH0-R S-EH1-L-V-Z S-OW1 HH-AW1-Z DH-IH1 S-W-EH1 DH-ER0 W-IY1-V B-IH1-N HH-AE1 V-IH0-NG


not entirely sure what to expect.

N-AA1 T-IH0-N T-AY1 ER0 L-IY0 SH-UH1 R-W-AH1-T T-UW1 IH0-K-S P-EH1-K-T


good, if you're part of the foster's best joke award and you are reviewing it, please put that, tell your friends.

G-UH1 D-IH1 F-Y-UH1-R P-AA1-R T-AH1-V DH-AH0 F-AA1-S T-ER0-Z B-EH1-S-T JH-OW1 K-AH0 W-AO1-R D-AH0-N D-Y-UW1 AA1-R R-IY0 V-Y-UW1 IH0 NG-IH1-T P-L-IY1-Z P-UH1-T DH-AE1-T T-EH1 L-Y-AO1-R F-R-EH1-N-D-Z


been friz frizzle, and all my life i've wanted to be a professional song ruiner. sadly, that doesn't pay very well or at all.

B-IH1-N F-R-IH1-Z F-R-IH1 Z-AH0 L-AH0-N D-AO1-L M-AY1 L-AY1 F-AY1 V-W-AA1-N T-AH0-D T-UW1 B-IY1 AH0 P-R-AH0 F-EH1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-L S-AO1 NG-R-UW1 AH0 N-ER0 S-AE1 D-L-IY0 DH-AE1-T D-OW1 S-AH0-N-T P-EY1 V-EH1 R-IY0 W-EH1 L-AO1 R-AE1 T-AO1-L


so what i do instead is i do 10 minutes previews at free fringe showcases like this one.

S-OW1 W-AH1 T-AY1 D-UW1 IH0-N-S T-EH1 D-IH1 Z-AY1 D-UW1 T-EH1-N M-IH1 N-AH0-T-S P-R-IY1 V-Y-UW2 Z-AE1-T F-R-IY1 F-R-IH1-N-JH SH-OW1 K-EY2 S-IH0 Z-L-AY1-K DH-IH1 S-W-AH1-N


and i'm starving. it's fun, so...

AH0-N D-IH1-M-S T-AA1-R V-IH0 NG-IH1-T-S F-AH1-N S-OW1


i'm just going to get right into it. i'm going to ruin a couple of your songs from your childhood now, preferably from disney movies.

IH1-M JH-AH1-S-T G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 G-EH1 T-R-AY1 T-IH0-N T-UW1 IH1 T-IH1-M G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 R-UW1 AH0 N-AH0 K-AH1 P-AH0 L-AH1 V-Y-AO1-R S-AO1-NG-Z F-R-AH1 M-Y-AO1-R CH-AY1-L-D HH-UH2 D-N-AW1 P-R-EH1 F-ER0 AH0 B-L-IY0 F-R-AH1-M D-IH1 Z-N-IY0 M-UW1 V-IY0-Z


oh, hospital. i want to trust him with my kids. it's a man called...

OW1 HH-AA1-S P-IH2 T-AH0 L-AY1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 T-R-AH1-S-T HH-IH1 M-W-IH1 DH-M-AY1 K-IH1-D Z-IH1-T S-AH0 M-AE1-N K-AO1-L-D


jenny introduced beforehand, i'm a big fan of les mis. i would never change the lyrics to a les mis song...

JH-EH1 N-IY0 IH2-N T-R-AH0 D-UW1-S-T B-IH0 F-AO1-R HH-AE2-N D-IH1 M-AH0 B-IH1-G F-AE1 N-AH1 V-L-EH1 S-M-IH1 S-AY1 W-UH1 D-N-EH1 V-ER0 CH-EY1-N-JH DH-AH0 L-IH1 R-IH0-K-S T-UW1 AH0 L-EH1 S-M-IH1-S S-AO1-NG


ever, i wouldn't do that. that would be the work of a madman.

EH1 V-ER0 AY1 W-UH1 D-L-AH0-N-T D-UW1 DH-AE1-T DH-AE1 T-W-UH1-D B-IY1 DH-AH0 W-ER1 K-AH1 V-AH0 M-AE1 D-M-AE2-N


what i've done, is i've taken the lyrics of les mis and i put them to different, happier tunes, which is the work of a sane person.

W-AH1 T-AY1-V D-AH1 N-IH1 Z-AY1-V T-EY1 K-AH0-N DH-AH0 L-IH1 R-IH0-K S-AH1 V-L-EH1 S-M-IH1 S-AH0-N D-AY1 P-UH1-T DH-EH1-M T-UW1 D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N-T HH-AE1 P-IY0 ER0 T-UW1-N Z-W-IH1 CH-IH1-Z DH-AH0 W-ER1 K-AH1 V-AH0 S-EY1-N P-ER1 S-AH0-N


and i call the process less miserable.

AH0-N D-AY1 K-AO1-L DH-AH0 P-R-AA1 S-EH2 S-L-EH1 S-M-IH1 Z-ER0 AH0 B-AH0-L


here's a new song i've written very recently, it's a nineties classic.

HH-IH1-R Z-AH0 N-UW1 S-AO1 NG-AY1 V-R-IH1 T-AH0-N V-EH1 R-IY0 R-IY1 S-AH0-N T-L-IY0 IH1-T S-AH0 N-AY1-N T-IY0-Z K-L-AE1 S-IH0-K


and [damien hurst 00:09:32] is fond of the dalai lama. [david jason 00:09:35] in danger mouse, enjoys brussels sprouts and broccoli and beans, but not butter beans they're evil.

AH0-N-D D-EY1 M-IY0 AH0-N HH-ER1-S-T Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0 Z-N-AY1-N M-IH1 N-AH0-T S-AH0-N-D TH-ER1 D-IY0 T-UW1 S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D Z-IH1-Z F-AA1-N D-AH1-V DH-AH0 D-AE1 L-EY2 L-AA1 M-AH0 D-EY1 V-IH0-D JH-EY1 S-AH0-N Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0 Z-N-AY1-N M-IH1 N-AH0-T S-AH0-N-D TH-ER1 D-IY0 F-AY1-V S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D Z-IH0-N D-EY1-N JH-ER0 M-AW1 S-EH0-N JH-OY1-Z B-R-AH1 S-AH0-L-Z-S P-R-AW1-T S-AH0-N-D B-R-AA1 K-AH0 L-IY0 AH0-N-D B-IY1-N-Z B-AH1 T-N-AA1-T B-AH1 T-ER0 B-IY1-N-Z TH-EH1 R-IY1 V-AH0-L


elected politicians who control a whole nation and dare to call it democracy.

IH0 L-EH1-K T-AH0-D P-AA2 L-AH0 T-IH1 SH-AH0-N-Z HH-UW1 K-AH0-N T-R-OW1 L-AH0 HH-OW1-L N-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-N-D D-EH1-R T-UW1 K-AO1 L-IH1-T D-IH0 M-AA1 K-R-AH0 S-IY0


how she loathes propaganda, slander of standing truth, teller sold out by those who [inaudible 00:09:53] panda to the pound signs.

HH-AW1 SH-IY1 L-OW1-DH-Z P-R-AA2 P-AH0 G-AE1-N D-AH0 S-L-AE1-N D-ER0 AH1-V-S T-AE1-N D-IH0-NG T-R-UW1-TH T-EH1 L-ER0 S-OW1-L D-AW1-T B-AY1 DH-OW1-Z HH-UW1 IH0 N-AO1 D-AH0 B-AH0-L Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0 Z-N-AY1-N M-IH1 N-AH0-T S-AH0-N-D F-IH1-F T-IY0 TH-R-IY1 S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D-Z P-AE1-N D-AH0 T-UW1 DH-AH0 P-AW1-N-D S-AY1-N-Z


how she can't abide conservatism, capitalism and most of the uses of the suffix ism.

HH-AW1 SH-IY1 K-AE1-N T-AH0 B-AY1-D K-AH0-N S-ER1 V-AH0 T-IH2 Z-AH0-M K-AE1 P-IH0 T-AH0 L-IH2 Z-AH0 M-AH0-N D-M-OW1-S T-AH1-V DH-AH0 Y-UW1 S-IH0 Z-AH1-V DH-AH0 S-AH1 F-IH0-K S-IH1 Z-AH0-M


she speaks in the third person because it's not all about her.

SH-IY1-S P-IY1-K S-IH0-N DH-AH0 TH-ER1-D P-ER1 S-AH0-N B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1-T S-N-AA1 T-AO1 L-AH0 B-AW1-T HH-ER0


i can't look after a kid. i can barely look after myself, man. so this is 16 reasons why i should never have children and the oral trim.

AY1 K-AE1-N T-L-UH1 K-AE1-F T-ER0 AH0 K-IH1 D-AY1 K-AE1-N B-EH1-R L-IY0 L-UH1 K-AE1-F T-ER0 M-AY2 S-EH1-L F-M-AE1-N S-OW1 DH-IH1 S-IH1-Z S-IH0-K-S T-IY1 N-R-IY1 Z-AH0-N Z-W-AY1 AY1 SH-UH1 D-N-EH1 V-ER0 HH-AE1-V CH-IH1-L D-R-AH0 N-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 AO1 R-AH0-L T-R-IH1-M


because i'd fight over their toys and i'd cry if i couldn't play.

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1-D F-AY1 T-OW1 V-ER0 DH-EH1-R T-OY1 Z-AH0-N D-IH1-D K-R-AY1 IH1 F-AY1 K-AW1-L D-AH0-N-T P-L-EY1


because i couldn't promise i'd remember to feed them every day, because-

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AY1 K-AW1-L D-AH0-N-T P-R-AA1 M-AH0 S-IH1 D-R-IH0 M-EH1-M B-ER0 T-UW1 F-IY1-D DH-EH1 M-EH1 V-ER0 IY0 D-EY1 B-IH0 K-AO1-Z


i'd give them names like dante, yacobi and raoul and embarrass them on purpose.

IH1-D G-IH1-V DH-EH1-M N-EY1-M Z-L-AY1-K D-AA1-N T-EY0 Y-AA0 K-OW1 B-IY0 AH0-N D-R-AA0 UW1 L-AH0-N D-IH0-M B-EH1 R-AH0-S DH-EH1 M-AA1-N P-ER1 P-AH0-S


because i'd threatened them with adoption whenever they were naughty.

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1-D TH-R-EH1 T-AH0-N-D DH-EH1 M-W-IH1 DH-AH0 D-AA1-P SH-AH0 N-W-EH0 N-EH1 V-ER0 DH-EY1 W-ER0 N-AO1 T-IY0


because i'd still pretend to be down with the kids when i was 40.

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1-D-S T-IH1-L P-R-IY0 T-EH1-N-D T-UW1 B-IY1 D-AW1 N-W-IH1-DH DH-AH0 K-IH1-D Z-W-EH1 N-AY1 W-AA1-Z F-AO1-R T-IY0


because i'd make them pretend to have tourette's at important social events and i'd force them to all get paper-

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1 D-M-EY1-K DH-EH1-M P-R-IY0 T-EH1-N-D T-UW1 HH-AE1-V T-UH1 R-AH0-T S-AE1 T-IH0-M P-AO1-R T-AH0-N-T S-OW1 SH-AH0 L-IH0 V-EH1-N-T S-AH0-N D-IH1-D F-AO1-R-S DH-EH1-M T-UW1 AO1-L G-EH1-T P-EY1 P-ER0


rounds so i could start charging them rent.i'd buy jigsaws to keep them quiet, but i'd hide at least one of the pieces.

R-AW1-N-D-Z S-OW1 AY1 K-UH1-D-S T-AA1-R-T CH-AA1-R JH-IH0-NG DH-EH1 M-R-EH1-N T-IH0-D B-AY1 JH-IH1-G Z-AO2-F-S T-UW1 K-IY1-P DH-EH1-M K-W-AY1 AH0-T B-AH1 T-IH1-D HH-AY1 D-AE1 T-L-IY1-S T-W-AH1 N-AH1-V DH-AH0 P-IY1 S-AH0-Z


and i wouldn't tell them fairy tales about santa, the tooth fairy or-

AH0-N D-AY1 W-UH1 D-L-AH0-N-T T-EH1-L DH-EH1-M F-EH1 R-IY0 T-EY1-L Z-AH0 B-AW1-T S-AE1-N T-AH0 DH-AH0 T-UW1-TH F-EH1 R-IY0 AO1-R


jesus. because i'd regularly confiscate and eat all of their chocolate and candy. and i'd dressed them up in fucking ridiculous clothes, like 20th century, 17th century dandy's.

JH-IY1 Z-AH0-S B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1 D-R-EH1 G-Y-AH0 L-ER0 L-IY0 K-AA1-N F-AH0-S K-EY2 T-AH0-N D-IY1 T-AO1 L-AH1-V DH-EH1-R CH-AO1 K-L-AH0 T-AH0-N-D K-AE1-N D-IY0 AH0-N D-IH1-D D-R-EH1-S-T DH-EH1 M-AH1 P-IH0-N F-AH1 K-IH0 NG-R-IH0 D-IH1 K-Y-AH0 L-AH0-S K-L-OW1-DH Z-L-AY1-K T-W-EH1-N T-IY0 AH0-TH S-EH1-N CH-ER0 IY0 S-EH1 V-AH0-N T-IY1-N-TH S-EH1-N CH-ER0 IY0 D-AE1-N D-IY0-Z


because i couldn't justify it to them.

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AY1 K-AW1-L D-AH0-N-T JH-AH1-S T-AH0 F-AY2 IH1-T T-UW1 DH-EH1-M


why my life's the way it is, because i couldn't look in their eyes and explain why i brought them into this.

W-AY1 M-AY1 L-AY1-F-S DH-AH0 W-EY1 IH1 T-IH1-Z B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AY1 K-AW1-L D-AH0-N T-L-UH1 K-IH0-N DH-EH1 R-AY1 Z-AH0-N D-IH0-K-S P-L-EY1 N-W-AY1 AY1 B-R-AO1-T DH-EH1 M-IH0-N T-UW1 DH-IH1-S


because i'd rather shag david cameron than go through the pain of childbirth.

B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1 D-R-AE1 DH-ER0 SH-AE1-G D-EY1 V-IH0-D K-AE1 M-ER0 AH0-N DH-AE1-N G-OW1 TH-R-UW1 DH-AH0 P-EY1 N-AH1-V CH-AY1-L-D B-ER2-TH


and my final reason. i suggest you read phillip larkin's, this be the verse.

AH0-N D-M-AY1 F-AY1 N-AH0-L R-IY1 Z-AH0 N-AY1 S-AH0-G JH-EH1-S T-Y-UW1 R-EH1-D F-IH1 L-IH0 P-L-AA1-R K-IH0-N-Z DH-IH1-S B-IY1 DH-AH0 V-ER1-S


they said that i attacked her.

DH-EY1 S-EH1-D DH-AE1 T-AY1 AH0 T-AE1-K-T HH-ER0


but that's not right at all. they said, i tried to eat her.

B-AH1-T TH-AE1-T S-N-AA1 T-R-AY1 T-AE1 T-AO1-L DH-EY1 S-EH1 D-AY1 T-R-AY1-D T-UW1 IY1-T HH-ER0


but i'm not a cannibal. it's just that floor length, blue poncho-

B-AH1 T-IH1-M N-AA1 T-AH0 K-AE1 N-AH0 B-AH0 L-IH1-T-S JH-AH1-S-T DH-AE1-T F-L-AO1-R L-EH1-NG-K-TH B-L-UW1 P-AA1-N CH-OW0


what she chosen to wear and those massive long eyes and that shiny blue hair made me react the only way that i can, because i'm not a criminal. i am pac-man.

W-AH1-T SH-IY1 CH-OW1 Z-AH0-N T-UW1 W-EH1 R-AH0-N-D DH-OW1 Z-M-AE1 S-IH0 V-L-AO1 NG-AY1 Z-AH0-N-D DH-AE1-T SH-AY1 N-IY0 B-L-UW1 HH-EH1-R M-EY1 D-M-IY1 R-IY0 AE1-K-T DH-AH0 OW1 N-L-IY0 W-EY1 DH-AE1 T-AY1 K-AE1-N B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1-M N-AA1 T-AH0 K-R-IH1 M-AH0 N-AH0 L-AY1 AE1-M P-AE1 K-M-AH0-N


and on that note, i will introduce to you the final guest of this evening.

AH0-N D-AA1-N DH-AE1 T-N-OW1 T-AY1 W-IH1 L-IH2-N T-R-AH0 D-UW1-S T-UW1 Y-UW1 DH-AH0 F-AY1 N-AH0-L G-EH1-S T-AH1-V DH-IH1 S-IY1 V-N-IH0-NG


he is the video game loving, vegetarian heap of wonderful lettuce, mr. dominic berry.

HH-IY1 IH1-Z DH-AH0 V-IH1 D-IY0 OW0 G-EY1 M-L-AH1 V-IH0-NG V-EH2 JH-AH0 T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0-N HH-IY1 P-AH1 V-W-AH1-N D-ER0 F-AH0-L L-EH1 T-AH0 S-M-IH1-S T-ER0 D-AA1 M-AH0 N-IH0-K B-EH1 R-IY0


well, what a lovely introduction. if you too are a fan of video games, would you please give me a little whoop? okay. so this entire set is for three people.

W-EH1 L-W-AH1 T-AH0 L-AH1 V-L-IY0 IH2-N T-R-AH0 D-AH1-K SH-AH0 N-IH1 F-Y-UW1 T-UW1 AA1 R-AH0 F-AE1 N-AH1-V V-IH1 D-IY0 OW0 G-EY1-M Z-W-UH1 D-Y-UW1 P-L-IY1-Z G-IH1 V-M-IY1 AH0 L-IH1 T-AH0 L-W-UW1 P-OW2 K-EY1 S-OW1 DH-IH1 S-IH0-N T-AY1 ER0 S-EH1 T-IH1-Z F-AO1-R TH-R-IY1 P-IY1 P-AH0-L


i'm sure even the most casual gamers been there though. just so-

IH1-M SH-UH1 R-IY1 V-IH0-N DH-AH0 M-OW1-S-T K-AE1 ZH-AH0 W-AH0-L G-EY1 M-ER0-Z B-IH1-N DH-EH1-R DH-OW1 JH-AH1-S-T S-OW1


addicted to online gaming. you can't tear yourself away. so you end up shitting yourself.

AH0 D-IH1-K T-AH0-D T-UW1 AO1 N-L-AY2-N G-EY1 M-IH0 NG-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N-T T-EH1 R-Y-ER0 S-EH1-L F-AH0 W-EY1 S-OW1 Y-UW1 EH1-N D-AH1-P SH-IH1 T-IH0 NG-Y-ER0 S-EH1-L-F


it's happened to all of us, right? yes, of course. so-

IH1-T-S HH-AE1 P-AH0-N-D T-UW1 AO1 L-AH1 V-AH1 S-R-AY1 T-Y-EH1 S-AH1-V K-AO1-R-S S-OW1


not as much as this sensation in your-

N-AA1 T-AE1 Z-M-AH1 CH-AE1-Z DH-IH1-S S-EH0-N S-EY1 SH-AH0 N-IH0 N-Y-AO1-R


gyration, it's not your imagination. you need to poo, defecation.

JH-AY0 R-EY1 SH-AH0 N-IH1-T S-N-AA1 T-Y-AO1 R-IH0 M-AE2 JH-AH0 N-EY1 SH-AH0 N-Y-UW1 N-IY1-D T-UW1 P-UW1 D-EH2 F-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0-N


needs your full attention. you can't risk mobilization for fecal elimination.how you pray for-

N-IY1-D Z-Y-AO1-R F-UH1 L-AH0 T-EH1-N SH-AH0 N-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N T-R-IH1-S K-M-OW2 B-AH0 L-AH0 Z-EY1 SH-AH0-N F-AO1-R F-IY1 K-AH0 L-IH0 L-IH2 M-IH0 N-AA1 SH-IY0 OW2 N-Y-UW1 P-R-EY1 F-AO1-R


comes the situation is trouser annihilation.

K-AH1-M-Z DH-AH0 S-IH2 CH-UW0 EY1 SH-AH0 N-IH1-Z T-R-AW1 Z-ER0 AH0 N-AY2 AH0 L-EY1 SH-AH0-N


eat emancipation of your bowels, evacuation you did win-

IY1 T-IH0 M-AE2-N S-AH0 P-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH1 V-Y-AO1-R B-AW1 AH0-L Z-IH0 V-AE2 K-Y-AH0 W-EY1 SH-AH0 N-Y-UW1 D-IH1 D-W-IH1-N


in the game elation swells with smells-

IH0-N DH-AH0 G-EY1 M-IH0 L-EY1 SH-AH0-N S-W-EH1-L Z-W-IH1-DH S-M-EH1-L-Z


of celebration. thank you very much. thank you.

AH1-V S-EH2 L-AH0 B-R-EY1 SH-AH0-N TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 V-EH1 R-IY0 M-AH1-CH TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1


i think har, i might try one with music.

AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K HH-AA1 R-AY1 M-AY1-T T-R-AY1 W-AH1 N-W-IH1 DH-M-Y-UW1 Z-IH0-K


oh, you're so much bigger than any bison. thank you very much. cheers.

OW1 Y-UH1-R S-OW1 M-AH1-CH B-IH1 G-ER0 DH-AE1 N-EH1 N-IY0 B-AY1 S-AH0-N TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 V-EH1 R-IY0 M-AH1-CH CH-IH1-R-Z


it's about another hobby of my mind-

IH1-T S-AH0 B-AW1 T-AH0 N-AH1 DH-ER0 HH-AA1 B-IY0 AH1 V-M-AY1 M-AY1-N-D


while writing this show i got stuck-

W-AY1-L R-AY1 T-IH0-NG DH-IH1-S SH-OW1 AY1 G-AA1-T-S T-AH1-K


the patriarchy is a conspiracy theory of wanted me to open my eyes to the reality that we are governed by a female supremacy.

DH-AH0 P-EY1 T-R-IY0 AA2-R K-IY0 IH1 Z-AH0 K-AH0-N-S P-IH1 R-AH0 S-IY0 TH-IH1 R-IY0 AH1 V-W-AA1-N T-AH0 D-M-IY1 T-UW1 OW1 P-AH0-N M-AY1 AY1-Z T-UW1 DH-AH0 R-IY0 AE1 L-AH0 T-IY0 DH-AE1 T-W-IY1 AA1-R G-AH1 V-ER0-N-D B-AY1 AH0 F-IY1 M-EY2-L S-AH0 P-R-EH1 M-AH0 S-IY0


i'm really bad at reading numbers.

IH1 M-R-IH1 L-IY0 B-AE1 D-AE1 T-R-EH1 D-IH0-NG N-AH1-M B-ER0-Z


so it's 18 stone 9?18 stone nine.

S-OW1 IH1-T S-EY0 T-IY1-N-S T-OW1-N N-AY1 N-IY0 T-EH2-N-S T-OW1-N N-AY1-N


yeah i do agree. so has anyone got 18 stone?

Y-AE1 AY1 D-UW1 AH0 G-R-IY1 S-OW1 HH-AE1 Z-EH1 N-IY0 W-AH2-N G-AA1 T-EY0 T-IY1-N-S T-OW1-N


have you got 18 stone nine? person at the back who's waving your paper? no. has anyone got 18 anything?

HH-AE1 V-Y-UW1 G-AA1 T-EY0 T-IY1-N-S T-OW1-N N-AY1-N P-ER1 S-AH0 N-AE1-T DH-AH0 B-AE1-K HH-UW1 Z-W-EY1 V-IH0 NG-Y-AO1-R P-EY1 P-ER0 N-OW1 HH-AE1 Z-EH1 N-IY0 W-AH2-N G-AA1 T-EY0 T-IY1 N-EH1 N-IY0 TH-IH2-NG


oh, quite a lot. okay. so has anyone got 18, eight?

OW1 K-W-AY1 T-AH0 L-AA1 T-OW2 K-EY1 S-OW1 HH-AE1 Z-EH1 N-IY0 W-AH2-N G-AA1 T-EY0 T-IY1 N-EY1-T


18, 10, 18 and a half? 18 seven. so has anyone got nearer than 18 seven?

EY0 T-IY1-N T-EH1 N-EY0 T-IY1 N-AH0-N D-AH0 HH-AE1 F-EY0 T-IY1-N S-EH1 V-AH0-N S-OW1 HH-AE1 Z-EH1 N-IY0 W-AH2-N G-AA1 T-N-IH1 R-ER0 DH-AE1 N-EY0 T-IY1-N S-EH1 V-AH0-N


you, man at the back, you have won me.

Y-UW1 M-AE1 N-AE1-T DH-AH0 B-AE1 K-Y-UW1 HH-AE1 V-W-AH1-N M-IY1


quickly say before odette comes on. this is my show.

K-W-IH1 K-L-IY0 S-EY1 B-IH0 F-AO1 R-OW2 D-EH1-T K-AH1-M Z-AA1-N DH-IH1 S-IH1 Z-M-AY1 SH-OW1


obviously it's still a preview, but thank you for bearing with the bits where-

AA1-B V-IY0 AH0 S-L-IY0 IH1-T-S-S T-IH1 L-AH0 P-R-IY1 V-Y-UW2 B-AH1-T TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 F-AO1-R B-EH1 R-IH0 NG-W-IH1-DH DH-AH0 B-IH1-T S-W-EH1-R


i've got a hashtag for the show, which is how to be fat. and if you'd want to tweet about the show use that hashtag and i'll definitely find you. so that's quite nice.

AY1-V G-AA1 T-AH0 HH-AE1-SH T-AH0-G F-AO1-R DH-AH0 SH-OW1 W-IH1 CH-IH1-Z HH-AW1 T-UW1 B-IY1 F-AE1 T-AH0-N D-IH1 F-Y-AH1 D-W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 T-W-IY1 T-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AH0 SH-OW1 Y-UW1-S DH-AE1-T HH-AE1-SH T-AH0 G-AH0-N D-IH1-L D-EH1 F-AH0 N-AH0 T-L-IY0 F-AY1-N D-Y-UW1 S-OW1 TH-AE1-T-S K-W-AY1 T-N-AY1-S


i know a couple of people said on twitter that they're here, but i don't know what they look like. so please-

AY1 N-OW1 AH0 K-AH1 P-AH0 L-AH1-V P-IY1 P-AH0-L S-EH1 D-AA1-N T-W-IH1 T-ER0 DH-AE1-T TH-EH1-R HH-IY1-R B-AH1 T-AY1 D-AA1-N T-N-OW1 W-AH1-T DH-EY1 L-UH1 K-L-AY1-K S-OW1 P-L-IY1-Z


come and say hello to me. that'd be great.

K-AH1 M-AH0-N-D S-EY1 HH-AH0 L-OW1 T-UW1 M-IY1 TH-AE1 T-AH0-D B-IY1 G-R-EY1-T


and can i just say, thank you obviously to dave for doing this and har for doing the sound and everyone who's, also aaron's here tonight and he did all my print and he's really, really talented-

AH0-N-D K-AE1 N-AY1 JH-AH1-S-T S-EY1 TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 AA1-B V-IY0 AH0 S-L-IY0 T-UW1 D-EY1-V F-AO1-R D-UW1 IH0-NG DH-IH1 S-AH0-N-D HH-AA1-R F-AO1-R D-UW1 IH0-NG DH-AH0 S-AW1-N D-AH0-N D-EH1 V-R-IY0 W-AH2-N HH-UW1 Z-AO1-L S-OW0 EH1 R-AH0-N-Z HH-IY1-R T-AH0 N-AY1 T-AH0-N-D HH-IY1 D-IH1 D-AO1-L M-AY1 P-R-IH1-N T-AH0-N-D HH-IY1 Z-R-IH1 L-IY0 R-IH1 L-IY0 T-AE1 L-AH0-N T-AH0-D


and yeah. thank you. i love you. thank you. that's the end of my show. thank you very much goodnight.

AH0-N D-Y-AE1 TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 AY1 L-AH1 V-Y-UW1 TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 TH-AE1-T-S DH-AH0 EH1-N D-AH1 V-M-AY1 SH-OW1 TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 V-EH1 R-IY0 M-AH1-CH G-UH1 D-N-AY2-T


at night. i hope so.


i hope you cry that it feels so-

AY1 HH-OW1 P-Y-UW1 K-R-AY1 DH-AE1 T-IH1-T F-IY1-L-Z S-OW1


when i was back in school because i knew-

W-EH1 N-AY1 W-AA1-Z B-AE1 K-IH0-N-S K-UW1-L B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AY1 N-UW1


that you get to pin on me and i am not a tg-

DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 G-EH1-T T-UW1 P-IH1 N-AA1-N M-IY1 AH0-N D-AY1 AE1-M N-AA1 T-AH0 T-IY1 JH-IY1


i am not a category. my only initials are a j and you will respect that about me. so if you come for me-

AY1 AE1-M N-AA1 T-AH0 K-AE1 T-AH0 G-AO2 R-IY0 M-AY1 OW1 N-L-IY0 IH0 N-IH1 SH-AH0-L Z-AA1 R-AH0 JH-EY1 AH0-N D-Y-UW1 W-IH1-L R-IH0-S P-EH1-K-T DH-AE1 T-AH0 B-AW1 T-M-IY1 S-OW1 IH1 F-Y-UW1 K-AH1-M F-AO1-R M-IY1


with labels intended to dehumanize, do de legitimize my trajectory to project your own lack of humanity on me, i will change your channel.

W-IH1 DH-L-EY1 B-AH0-L Z-IH0-N T-EH1-N D-AH0-D T-UW1 D-IH0 HH-Y-UW1 M-AH0 N-AY0-Z D-UW1 D-IY1 L-AH0 JH-IH1 T-AH0 M-AY2 Z-M-AY1 T-R-AH0 JH-EH1-K T-ER0 IY0 T-UW1 P-R-AA0 JH-EH1-K T-Y-AO1 R-OW1 N-L-AE1 K-AH1-V HH-Y-UW0 M-AE1 N-IH0 T-IY0 AA1-N M-IY1 AY1 W-IH1-L CH-EY1-N JH-Y-AO1-R CH-AE1 N-AH0-L


make your tracks skip, rewrite your past and your future the way you want to edit me.

M-EY1 K-Y-AO1-R T-R-AE1-K-S-S K-IH1 P-R-IY0 R-AY1 T-Y-AO1-R P-AE1-S T-AH0-N D-Y-AO1-R F-Y-UW1 CH-ER0 DH-AH0 W-EY1 Y-UW1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 EH1 D-AH0 T-M-IY1


so if you please, respectfully, hear and acknowledge me.

S-OW1 IH1 F-Y-UW1 P-L-IY1 Z-R-IH0-S P-EH1-K-T F-AH0 L-IY0 HH-IY1 R-AH0-N D-AE0 K-N-AA1 L-IH0 JH-M-IY1


a c d, a t s, a he she, a shemale, a scam-

AH0 S-IY1 D-IY1 AH0 T-IY1 EH1 S-AH0 HH-IY1 SH-IY1 AH0 SH-AH0 M-EY1 L-AH0-S K-AE1-M


a trap, a pretendbian ms. brennan or even a teacher-

AH0 T-R-AE1 P-AH0 P-R-IY0 T-EH1-N-D B-IY0-N M-IH1-Z B-R-EH1 N-AH0 N-AO1 R-IY1 V-IH0 N-AH0 T-IY1 CH-ER0


i am anathema jane mckenna.

AY1 AE1 M-AH0 N-AE1 TH-AH0 M-AH0 JH-EY1-N M-AH0 K-EH1 N-AH0


i'm feeling kind of, this is, this is really, really bad.

IH1-M F-IY1 L-IH0-NG K-AY1-N D-AH1-V DH-IH1 S-IH1-Z DH-IH1 S-IH1 Z-R-IH1 L-IY0 R-IH1 L-IY0 B-AE1-D


go down some stairs and i'm like just about everywhere in linda down, even more stairs.

G-OW1 D-AW1-N S-AH1-M-S T-EH1-R Z-AH0-N D-IH1 M-L-AY1-K JH-AH1-S T-AH0 B-AW1 T-EH1 V-R-IY0 W-EH2 R-IH0 N-L-IH1-N D-AH0 D-AW1 N-IY1 V-IH0-N M-AO1-R-S T-EH1-R-Z


so they're in a basement and there's quite a lot of graffiti on those doors.

S-OW1 TH-EH1 R-IH0 N-AH0 B-EY1 S-M-AH0-N T-AH0-N-D DH-EH1-R-Z K-W-AY1 T-AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1-V G-R-AH0 F-IY1 T-IY0 AA1-N DH-OW1-Z D-AO1-R-Z


they are kind of intimidating. so what i'm going to do, if it's totally okay with you guys is i'm just.

DH-EY1 AA1-R K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-IH0-N T-IH1 M-IH0 D-EY2 T-IH0-NG S-OW1 W-AH1 T-IH1-M G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 D-UW1 IH1 F-IH1-T-S T-OW1 T-AH0 L-IY0 OW2 K-EY1 W-IH1 DH-Y-UW1 G-AY1 Z-IH1 Z-IH1-M JH-AH1-S-T


i'm basically just going to do it on stage, if that's okay.

IH1-M B-EY1 S-IH0 K-L-IY0 JH-AH1-S-T G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 D-UW1 IH1 T-AA1-N-S T-EY1 JH-IH1-F TH-AE1-T S-OW2 K-EY1


it's a fringe show. it's not at the fringe now, but it is. we can do this.

IH1-T S-AH0 F-R-IH1-N-JH SH-OW1 IH1-T S-N-AA1 T-AE1-T DH-AH0 F-R-IH1-N JH-N-AW1 B-AH1 T-IH1 T-IH1 Z-W-IY1 K-AE1-N D-UW1 DH-IH1-S


it's confronting the body better. we can explain it as that. okay.

IH1-T-S K-AH0-N F-R-AH1-N T-IH0-NG DH-AH0 B-AA1 D-IY0 B-EH1 T-ER0 W-IY1 K-AE1 N-IH0-K-S P-L-EY1 N-IH1 T-AE1-Z DH-AE1 T-OW2 K-EY1


here's the thing about that poem, when i perform that poem-

HH-IH1-R-Z DH-AH0 TH-IH1 NG-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AE1-T P-OW1 AH0 M-W-EH1 N-AY1 P-ER0 F-AO1-R-M DH-AE1-T P-OW1 AH0-M


and it's not because of any of the substantive stuff in the poem.

AH0-N D-IH1-T S-N-AA1-T B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AH1 V-EH1 N-IY0 AH1-V DH-AH0 S-AH1-B-S T-AH0-N T-IH0-V-S T-AH1 F-IH0-N DH-AH0 P-OW1 AH0-M


it's because of the fact that i wrote that poem five years ago. so when i have lines in it about not being comfortable in my skin.

IH1-T-S B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-AH1-V DH-AH0 F-AE1-K-T DH-AE1 T-AY1 R-OW1-T DH-AE1-T P-OW1 AH0-M F-AY1 V-Y-IH1-R Z-AH0 G-OW1 S-OW1 W-EH1 N-AY1 HH-AE1 V-L-AY1-N Z-IH0 N-IH1 T-AH0 B-AW1 T-N-AA1-T B-IY1 IH0-NG K-AH1-M F-ER0 T-AH0 B-AH0 L-IH0-N M-AY1-S K-IH1-N


when i wrote that particular poem, but i've been on estrogen-

W-EH1 N-AY1 R-OW1-T DH-AE1-T P-ER0 T-IH1 K-Y-AH0 L-ER0 P-OW1 AH0-M B-AH1 T-AY1-V B-IH1 N-AA1 N-EH1-S T-R-AH0 JH-AH0-N


now for almost two years.

N-AW1 F-AO1 R-AO1-L M-OW2-S-T T-UW1 Y-IH1-R-Z


i've been on testosterone blockers, since this april.

AY1-V B-IH1 N-AA1-N T-EH2-S T-AA1-S T-ER0 OW2-N B-L-AA1 K-ER0-Z S-IH1-N-S DH-IH1 S-EY1 P-R-AH0-L


i feel a lot more comfortable in my skin.

AY1 F-IY1 L-AH0 L-AA1 T-M-AO1-R K-AH1-M F-ER0 T-AH0 B-AH0 L-IH0-N M-AY1-S K-IH1-N


and that is that my skin is white. and that as much as i may feel uncomfortable in toilets, as much as i may sometimes feel uncomfortable in the street-

AH0-N-D DH-AE1 T-IH1-Z DH-AE1 T-M-AY1-S K-IH1 N-IH1 Z-W-AY1 T-AH0-N-D DH-AE1 T-AE1 Z-M-AH1 CH-AE1 Z-AY1 M-EY1 F-IY1 L-AH0-N K-AH1-M F-ER0 T-AH0 B-AH0 L-IH0-N T-OY1 L-AH0-T S-AE1 Z-M-AH1 CH-AE1 Z-AY1 M-EY1 S-AH0-M T-AY1-M-Z F-IY1 L-AH0-N K-AH1-M F-ER0 T-AH0 B-AH0 L-IH0-N DH-AH0-S T-R-IY1-T


i'm a white middle class trans woman from england.

IH1 M-AH0 W-AY1 T-M-IH1 D-AH0-L K-L-AE1-S T-R-AE1-N Z-W-UH1 M-AH0-N F-R-AH1 M-IH1-NG G-L-AH0-N-D


and for trans people, we begin that counts again, every november.

AH0-N-D F-AO1-R T-R-AE1-N-Z P-IY1 P-AH0 L-W-IY1 B-IH0 G-IH1-N DH-AE1-T K-AW1-N-T S-AH0 G-EH1 N-EH1 V-ER0 IY0 N-OW0 V-EH1-M B-ER0


so this year's list begins in georgia in tbilisi with an unknown woman who will not be the last we will not name this year.

S-OW1 DH-IH1 S-Y-IH1-R Z-L-IH1-S-T B-IH0 G-IH1-N Z-IH0-N JH-AO1-R JH-AH0 IH0-N T-AH0 B-IH0 L-IY1 S-IY0 W-IH1 DH-AE1 N-AH0-N N-OW1 N-W-UH1 M-AH0-N HH-UW1 W-IH1-L N-AA1-T B-IY1 DH-AH0 L-AE1-S T-W-IY1 W-IH1-L N-AA1 T-N-EY1-M DH-IH1 S-Y-IH1-R


then gizzy fowler gunned down in front of her home just days before last year's memorial, but too late for the lists.

DH-EH1-N G-IH1 Z-IY0 F-AW1 L-ER0 G-AH1-N-D D-AW1 N-IH0-N F-R-AH1-N T-AH1-V HH-ER0 HH-OW1-M JH-AH1-S-T D-EY1-Z B-IH0 F-AO1-R L-AE1-S T-Y-IH1-R Z-M-AH0 M-AO1 R-IY0 AH0-L B-AH1-T T-UW1 L-EY1-T F-AO1-R DH-AH0 L-IH1-S-T-S


and deshawn desanchez shot while she pounded on a door, asking for help. kaymori shetoya-

AH0-N-D D-EH1 SH-AH0-N D-IH0 S-AE1-N CH-EH0-Z SH-AA1 T-W-AY1-L SH-IY1 P-AW1-N D-IH0 D-AA1 N-AH0 D-AO1 R-AE1-S K-IH0-NG F-AO1-R HH-EH1-L-P K-EH2 M-AO1 R-IY0 SH-AH0 T-OY1 AH0


johnson shot in albany, georgia, usa, and marisol almeda found dead in ecuador on christmas eve, 2014.

JH-AA1-N S-AH0-N SH-AA1 T-IH0 N-AO1-L B-AH0 N-IY0 JH-AO1-R JH-AH0 Y-UW1 EH1 S-EY1 AH0-N D-M-EH1 R-IH0 S-AH0 L-AA0-L M-EY1 D-AH0 F-AW1-N-D D-EH1 D-IH0 N-EH1 K-W-AH0 D-AO2 R-AA1-N K-R-IH1 S-M-AH0 S-IY1-V T-W-EH1-N T-IY0 F-AO1-R T-IY1-N


we know so many trans women die in...

W-IY1 N-OW1 S-OW1 M-EH1 N-IY0 T-R-AE1-N Z-W-IH1 M-AH0-N D-AY1 IH0-N


...instead of slowing down. alicia walker's body dug up from a shallow grave...

IH0-N-S T-EH1 D-AH1-V S-L-OW1 IH0-NG D-AW1 N-AH0 L-IH1 SH-AH0 W-AO1 K-ER0-Z B-AA1 D-IY0 D-AH1 G-AH1-P F-R-AH1 M-AH0 SH-AE1 L-OW0 G-R-EY1-V


...with a knife, stuck in her neck.

W-IH1 DH-AH0 N-AY1-F-S T-AH1 K-IH0-N HH-ER0 N-EH1-K


recently a time of writing for yoshi itsushida. and this is a line i wrote last...

R-IY1 S-AH0-N T-L-IY0 AH0 T-AY1 M-AH1 V-R-AY1 T-IH0-NG F-AO1 R-Y-OW1 SH-IY0 IH2-T S-UW0 SH-EY1 D-AH0 AH0-N-D DH-IH1 S-IH1 Z-AH0 L-AY1 N-AY1 R-OW1 T-L-AE1-S-T


i write his name down knowing between today and tomorrow, there can always...

AY1 R-AY1-T HH-IH1 Z-N-EY1-M D-AW1-N N-OW1 IH0-NG B-IH0 T-W-IY1-N T-AH0 D-EY1 AH0-N-D T-AH0 M-AA1 R-OW2 DH-EH1-R K-AE1 N-AO1 L-W-EY2-Z


it's a poem called letter to a minnesota prison, and it's dedicated to a woman called cc macdonald. i wrote it for apples and snake...

IH1-T S-AH0 P-OW1 AH0-M K-AO1-L D-L-EH1 T-ER0 T-UW1 AH0 M-IH2 N-IH0 S-OW1 T-AH0 P-R-IH1 Z-AH0 N-AH0-N D-IH1-T-S D-EH1 D-AH0 K-EY0 T-AH0-D T-UW1 AH0 W-UH1 M-AH0-N K-AO1-L-D S-IY1 S-IY1 M-AH0-K D-AA1 N-AH0-L D-AY1 R-OW1 T-IH1-T F-AO1 R-AE1 P-AH0-L Z-AH0-N-D S-N-EY1-K


it's in the paul hamlyn foundation. and it goes like this, your check bounced, cc. that was held against you. they...

IH1-T S-IH0-N DH-AH0 P-AO1-L HH-AE1 M-L-IH0-N F-AW0-N D-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-N D-IH1-T G-OW1 Z-L-AY1-K DH-IH1 S-Y-AO1-R CH-EH1-K B-AW1-N-S-T S-IY1 S-IY1 DH-AE1 T-W-AA1-Z HH-EH1-L D-AH0 G-EH1-N-S T-Y-UW1 DH-EY1


that's why they hate you, cc.

TH-AE1-T S-W-AY1 DH-EY1 HH-EY1 T-Y-UW1 S-IY1 S-IY1


i don't really know...


...how you end a show.


when you're dealing with something like that.

W-EH1 N-Y-UH1-R D-IY1 L-IH0 NG-W-IH1-DH S-AH1-M TH-IH0 NG-L-AY1-K DH-AE1-T


i think you have to hope that there is some kind of hope. and i...

AY1 TH-IH1-NG K-Y-UW1 HH-AE1-V T-UW1 HH-OW1-P DH-AE1-T DH-EH1 R-IH1-Z S-AH1-M K-AY1-N D-AH1-V HH-OW1 P-AH0-N D-AY1


...guess really that that hope is you. i joked about making a tightly knit revolutionary group at the start of this show. i'm...

G-EH1 S-R-IH1 L-IY0 DH-AE1-T DH-AE1-T HH-OW1 P-IH1 Z-Y-UW1 AY1 JH-OW1-K T-AH0 B-AW1 T-M-EY1 K-IH0 NG-AH0 T-AY1 T-L-IY0 N-IH1 T-R-EH2 V-AH0 L-UW1 SH-AH0 N-EH2 R-IY0 G-R-UW1 P-AE1-T DH-AH0-S T-AA1-R T-AH1-V DH-IH1-S SH-OW1 IH1-M


please put money in the bucket. in a capitalist society, money is violence...

P-L-IY1-Z P-UH1 T-M-AH1 N-IY0 IH0-N DH-AH0 B-AH1 K-AH0 T-IH0 N-AH0 K-AE1 P-AH0 T-AH0 L-AH0-S-T S-AH0 S-AY1 AH0 T-IY0 M-AH1 N-IY0 IH1-Z V-AY1 AH0 L-AH0-N-S


...but if you're pure, itself defense. but...

B-AH1 T-IH1 F-Y-UH1-R P-Y-UH1 R-IH0-T S-EH1-L-F D-IH0 F-EH1-N-S B-AH1-T


that, i didn't think that was...

DH-AE1 T-AY1 D-IH1 D-AH0-N-T TH-IH1-NG-K DH-AE1 T-W-AA1-Z


i'm pretty sure that there is going to be a petitioner. the guy who's the current prisons minister in the u-

IH1-M P-R-IH1 T-IY0 SH-UH1-R DH-AE1-T DH-EH1 R-IH1-Z G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 B-IY1 AH0 P-AH0 T-IH1 SH-AH0 N-ER0 DH-AH0 G-AY1 HH-UW1-Z DH-AH0 K-ER1 AH0-N-T P-R-IH1 Z-AH0-N Z-M-IH1 N-AH0-S T-ER0 IH0-N DH-AH0 Y-UW1


-k is a guy called andrew celis. andrew celis is an extremely religious person and...

K-EY1 IH1 Z-AH0 G-AY1 K-AO1-L D-AE1-N D-R-UW0 S-EH1 L-IH0 S-AE1-N D-R-UW0 S-EH1 L-IH0 S-IH1 Z-AE1 N-IH0-K-S T-R-IY1 M-L-IY0 R-IH0 L-IH1 JH-AH0-S P-ER1 S-AH0 N-AH0-N-D


...gain on twitter, which is what the aj, and aj mckenna stands for anathema jane mckenna on facebook. if you...

G-EY1 N-AA1-N T-W-IH1 T-ER0 W-IH1 CH-IH1 Z-W-AH1-T DH-AH0 AA1 JH-AH0-N D-AA1 JH-M-AH0 K-EH1 N-AH0-S T-AE1-N-D-Z F-AO1 R-AH0 N-AE1 TH-AH0 M-AH0 JH-EY1-N M-AH0 K-EH1 N-AH0 AA1-N F-EY1-S B-UH2 K-IH1 F-Y-UW1


...that petition. i'd really like it if you would sign it. and maybe we can explain to the justice ministry that we don't want that state...

DH-AE1-T P-AH0 T-IH1 SH-AH0 N-IH1 D-R-IH1 L-IY0 L-AY1 K-IH1 T-IH1 F-Y-UW1 W-UH1-D S-AY1 N-IH1 T-AH0-N D-M-EY1 B-IY0 W-IY1 K-AE1 N-IH0-K-S P-L-EY1-N T-UW1 DH-AH0 JH-AH1-S T-AH0 S-M-IH1 N-AH0-S T-R-IY0 DH-AE1 T-W-IY1 D-AA1-N T-W-AA1-N-T DH-AE1-T-S T-EY1-T


one of the things we'd like to do is invite people to come up on stage...

W-AH1 N-AH1-V DH-AH0 TH-IH1-NG Z-W-EH1 D-L-AY1-K T-UW1 D-UW1 IH1 Z-IH1-N V-AY0-T P-IY1 P-AH0-L T-UW1 K-AH1 M-AH1 P-AA1-N-S T-EY1-JH


...you are not, or have not really been on a stage before very often. the first two performers you saw tonight...

Y-UW1 AA1-R N-AA1 T-AO1-R HH-AE1 V-N-AA1 T-R-IH1 L-IY0 B-IH1 N-AA1 N-AH0-S T-EY1-JH B-IH0 F-AO1-R V-EH1 R-IY0 AO1 F-AH0-N DH-AH0 F-ER1-S-T T-UW1 P-ER0 F-AO1-R M-ER0 Z-Y-UW1 S-AO1 T-AH0 N-AY1-T


they were performers who've been on stage loads. and so it was...

DH-EY1 W-ER0 P-ER0 F-AO1-R M-ER0-Z HH-UW1-V B-IH1 N-AA1-N-S T-EY1 JH-L-OW1-D Z-AH0-N-D S-OW1 IH1 T-W-AA1-Z


that those words, unlucky, is something that i believe in. and also safety is a good thing you weirdos. so yeah, the second thing...

DH-AE1-T DH-OW1 Z-W-ER1-D Z-AH0 N-L-AH1 K-IY0 IH1-Z S-AH1-M TH-IH0-NG DH-AE1 T-AY1 B-IH0 L-IY1 V-IH0 N-AH0-N D-AO1-L S-OW0 S-EY1-F T-IY0 IH1 Z-AH0 G-UH1-D TH-IH1 NG-Y-UW1 W-IH1-R D-OW0-Z S-OW1 Y-AE1 DH-AH0 S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D TH-IH1-NG


...i want to say about this act is it's called tragic schooling and it is going to be hosted by liz bailey.

AY1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 S-EY1 AH0 B-AW1-T DH-IH1 S-AE1-K T-IH1 Z-IH1-T-S K-AO1-L-D T-R-AE1 JH-IH0-K-S K-UW1 L-IH0 NG-AH0-N D-IH1 T-IH1-Z G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 B-IY1 HH-OW1-S T-IH0-D B-AY1 L-IH1-Z B-EY1 L-IY0


liz bailey fans in the house.

L-IH1-Z B-EY1 L-IY0 F-AE1-N Z-IH0-N DH-AH0 HH-AW1-S


so liz has been with stand-up tragedy for the last four years...

S-OW1 L-IH1-Z HH-AE1-Z B-IH1 N-W-IH1-DH-S T-AE1-N D-AH2-P T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 F-AO1-R DH-AH0 L-AE1-S-T F-AO1 R-Y-IH1-R-Z


...she's been an amazing, a rock, that the stand-up tragedy has stood on. she has in many ways, stood on.

SH-EH1-S B-IH1 N-AE1 N-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0 NG-AH0 R-AA1-K DH-AE1-T DH-AH0-S T-AE1-N D-AH2-P T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 HH-AE1-Z-S T-UH1 D-AA1-N SH-IY1 HH-AE1 Z-IH0-N M-EH1 N-IY0 W-EY1-Z-S T-UH1 D-AA1-N


she has kept me together and i'm all over the place kind of guy...

SH-IY1 HH-AE1-Z K-EH1-P T-M-IY1 T-AH0 G-EH1 DH-ER0 AH0-N D-IH1 M-AO1 L-OW1 V-ER0 DH-AH0 P-L-EY1-S K-AY1-N D-AH1-V G-AY1


...so i need that. and she has been an amazing part of the team.

S-OW1 AY1 N-IY1-D DH-AE1 T-AH0-N-D SH-IY1 HH-AE1-Z B-IH1 N-AE1 N-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0-NG P-AA1-R T-AH1-V DH-AH0 T-IY1-M


she's performed with us, but she's kept the time, she's kept things in order, and she's just been an amazing person. she's an amazing friend of mine as well.

SH-EH1-S P-ER0 F-AO1-R-M D-W-IH1 DH-AH1-S B-AH1-T SH-EH1-S K-EH1-P-T DH-AH0 T-AY1-M SH-EH1-S K-EH1-P-T TH-IH1-NG Z-IH0 N-AO1-R D-ER0 AH0-N-D SH-EH1-S JH-AH1-S-T B-IH1 N-AE1 N-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0-NG P-ER1 S-AH0-N SH-EH1 S-AE1 N-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0-NG F-R-EH1-N D-AH1 V-M-AY1 N-AE1 Z-W-EH1-L


she is going to be hosting this act of the show. she is an academic. and so this is tragic schooling because people have to go back to school. she'll tell you what...

SH-IY1 IH1-Z G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 B-IY1 HH-OW1-S T-IH0-NG DH-IH1 S-AE1-K T-AH1-V DH-AH0 SH-OW1 SH-IY1 IH1 Z-AE1 N-AE2 K-AH0 D-EH1 M-IH0 K-AH0-N-D S-OW1 DH-IH1 S-IH1-Z T-R-AE1 JH-IH0-K-S K-UW1 L-IH0-NG B-IH0 K-AO1-Z P-IY1 P-AH0-L HH-AE1-V T-UW1 G-OW1 B-AE1-K T-UW1-S K-UW1-L SH-EH1-L T-EH1 L-Y-UW1 W-AH1-T


...sort of symbolic bookend. it's the end of a narrative arc.

S-AO1-R T-AH1-V S-IH0-M B-AA1 L-IH0-K B-UH1 K-EH2-N D-IH1-T-S DH-AH0 EH1-N D-AH1 V-AH0 N-AE1 R-AH0 T-IH0 V-AA1-R-K


somehow the death of this key figure of neo-liberalism...

S-AH1-M HH-AW2 DH-AH0 D-EH1 TH-AH1-V DH-IH1-S K-IY1 F-IH1 G-Y-ER0 AH1 V-N-IY2 AH0 L-IH1 B-R-AH0 L-AH0-S-T


...it meant something to me, it meant the end of something.

IH1 T-M-EH1-N-T S-AH1-M TH-IH0-NG T-UW1 M-IY1 IH1 T-M-EH1-N-T DH-AH0 EH1-N D-AH1-V S-AH1-M TH-IH0-NG


and i thought, no, it probably can't be again as ken loach would say.

AH0-N D-AY1 TH-AO1 T-N-OW1 IH1-T P-R-AA1 B-AH0 B-L-IY0 K-AE1-N-T B-IY1 AH0 G-EH1 N-AE1-Z K-EH1 N-L-OW1 CH-W-UH1-D S-EY1


but maybe it can be something different. i'm not sure socialism is at once we're...

B-AH1 T-M-EY1 B-IY0 IH1-T K-AE1-N B-IY1 S-AH1-M TH-IH0-NG D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N T-IH1-M N-AA1-T SH-UH1-R S-OW1 SH-AH0 L-IH2 Z-AH0 M-IH1 Z-AE1 T-W-AH1-N S-W-ER0


can be again, but i don't think the new liberal focus on the individual and reliance on the market can either.

K-AE1-N B-IY1 AH0 G-EH1-N B-AH1 T-AY1 D-AA1-N-T TH-IH1-NG-K DH-AH0 N-UW1 L-IH1 B-ER0 AH0-L F-OW1 K-AH0 S-AA1-N DH-AH0 IH2-N D-AH0 V-IH1 JH-AH0 W-AH0 L-AH0-N D-R-IH0 L-AY1 AH0-N S-AA1-N DH-AH0 M-AA1-R K-AH0-T K-AE1 N-IY1 DH-ER0


even though what's happening with the current government makes it look like it might be.

IY1 V-IH0-N DH-OW1 W-AH0-T-S HH-AE1 P-AH0 N-IH0 NG-W-IH1-DH DH-AH0 K-ER1 AH0-N-T G-AH1 V-ER0 M-AH0-N T-M-EY1-K S-IH1 T-L-UH1 K-L-AY1 K-IH1 T-M-AY1-T B-IY1


but i don't know what it will be. and that's why i study education because it allows us to have a critical mind and speak to power.

B-AH1 T-AY1 D-AA1-N T-N-OW1 W-AH1 T-IH1 T-W-IH1-L B-IY1 AH0-N-D TH-AE1-T S-W-AY1 AY1-S T-AH1 D-IY0 EH2 JH-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0-N B-IH0 K-AO1 Z-IH1 T-AH0 L-AW1 Z-AH1-S T-UW1 HH-AE1 V-AH0 K-R-IH1 T-IH0 K-AH0-L M-AY1-N D-AH0-N-D-S P-IY1-K T-UW1 P-AW1 ER0


but i'm afraid to get my hopes up again.

B-AH1 T-IH1 M-AH0 F-R-EY1-D T-UW1 G-EH1 T-M-AY1 HH-OW1-P S-AH1 P-AH0 G-EH1-N


what i can say is that if this is a question of ideas, it's time for some new ones. some of hope...

W-AH1 T-AY1 K-AE1-N S-EY1 IH1-Z DH-AE1 T-IH1-F DH-IH1 S-IH1 Z-AH0 K-W-EH1-S CH-AH0 N-AH1 V-AY0 D-IY1 AH0 Z-IH1-T-S T-AY1-M F-AO1-R S-AH1-M N-UW1 W-AH1-N-Z S-AH1 M-AH1-V HH-OW1-P


...some of community, some of welfare and well-

S-AH1 M-AH1-V K-AH0 M-Y-UW1 N-AH0 T-IY0 S-AH1 M-AH1 V-W-EH1-L F-EH2 R-AH0-N D-W-EH1-L


-being. those messages of the 30s and 40s shouldn't be...

B-IY1 IH0-NG DH-OW1 Z-M-EH1 S-AH0 JH-AH0 Z-AH1-V DH-AH0 TH-ER1 T-IY0 Z-AH0-N-D F-AO1-R T-IY0-Z SH-OW1-L T-AH0-N-T B-IY1


...lost. so i'm not sure what comes next, but i think that's up to all of...

L-AO1-S-T S-OW1 IH1-M N-AA1-T SH-UH1 R-W-AH1-T K-AH1-M Z-N-EH1-K-S-T B-AH1 T-AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K TH-AE1-T S-AH1-P T-UW1 AO1 L-AH1-V


...us, and the ideas we embrace, and the language we use to construct our world. thank you.

AH1 S-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 AY0 D-IY1 AH0 Z-W-IY1 EH0-M B-R-EY1 S-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 L-AE1-NG G-W-AH0 JH-W-IY1 Y-UW1-Z T-UW1 K-AH0-N-S T-R-AH1-K T-AW1 ER0 W-ER1-L-D TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1


i'm going to have to come to have to change the slides, which i hope weren't look too strange when i do the feminist part of this...

IH1-M G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 HH-AE1-V T-UW1 K-AH1-M T-UW1 HH-AE1-V T-UW1 CH-EY1-N-JH DH-AH0 S-L-AY1-D Z-W-IH1 CH-AY1 HH-OW1 P-W-EH1 R-AH0-N T-L-UH1-K T-UW1-S T-R-EY1-N JH-W-EH1 N-AY1 D-UW1 DH-AH0 F-EH1 M-AH0 N-AH0-S-T P-AA1-R T-AH1-V DH-IH1-S


...this presentation, the tragedy of public participation or how i wasted my life. listen.

DH-IH1-S P-R-EH2 Z-AH0-N T-EY1 SH-AH0-N DH-AH0 T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 AH1-V P-AH1 B-L-IH0-K P-AA0-R T-IH2 S-AH0 P-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AO1-R HH-AW1 AY1 W-EY1-S T-AH0 D-M-AY1 L-AY1 F-L-IH1 S-AH0-N


yeah. well, liz already spoke about these. these are some of the architects of the welfare...

Y-AE1 W-EH1-L L-IH1 Z-AO0-L R-EH1 D-IY0-S P-OW1 K-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-IY1-Z DH-IY1 Z-AA1-R S-AH1 M-AH1-V DH-AH0 AA1-R K-AH0 T-EH2-K-T S-AH1-V DH-AH0 W-EH1-L F-EH2-R


...state. and they look like an austere bunch, but they're some heroes of mine. and as academics, politicians, social reformers...

S-T-EY1 T-AH0-N-D DH-EY1 L-UH1 K-L-AY1 K-AE1 N-AO0-S T-IH1-R B-AH1-N-CH B-AH1-T TH-EH1-R S-AH1-M HH-IH1 R-OW0 Z-AH1 V-M-AY1 N-AH0-N D-AE1 Z-AE2 K-AH0 D-EH1 M-IH0-K-S P-AA2 L-AH0 T-IH1 SH-AH0-N-Z S-OW1 SH-AH0-L R-IH0 F-AO1-R M-ER0-Z


and see, i'm not very experienced with these microphones. and usually we just shower aca-

AH0-N-D S-IY1 IH1-M N-AA1-T V-EH1 R-IY0 IH0-K-S P-IH1 R-IY0 AH0-N-S T-W-IH1-DH DH-IY1 Z-M-AY1 K-R-OW0 F-OW2-N Z-AH0-N D-Y-UW1 ZH-AH0 W-AH0 L-IY0 W-IY1 JH-AH1-S-T SH-AW1 ER0 AE1 K-AH0


the absurdity of this quest to give power to the people, by getting you all to engage in what philosophers call a thought experiment.

DH-AH0 AH0-B S-ER1 D-AH0 T-IY0 AH1-V DH-IH1-S K-W-EH1-S-T T-UW1 G-IH1-V P-AW1 ER0 T-UW1 DH-AH0 P-IY1 P-AH0-L B-AY1 G-EH1 T-IH0 NG-Y-UW1 AO1-L T-UW1 EH0-N G-EY1 JH-IH0 N-W-AH1-T F-AH0 L-AA1 S-AH0 F-ER0-Z K-AO1 L-AH0 TH-AO1 T-IH0-K-S P-EH1 R-AH0 M-AH0-N-T


...neighbor. maybe they just got home from work.

N-EY1 B-ER0 M-EY1 B-IY0 DH-EY1 JH-AH1-S-T G-AA1-T HH-OW1-M F-R-AH1 M-W-ER1-K


so now they're standing out on the front step...

S-OW1 N-AW1 TH-EH1-R-S T-AE1-N D-IH0 NG-AW1 T-AA1-N DH-AH0 F-R-AH1-N-T-S T-EH1-P


...and they're kind of holding one shoe in one hand, they're wearing one shoe. they're frustrated...

AH0-N-D TH-EH1-R K-AY1-N D-AH1-V HH-OW1-L D-IH0 NG-W-AH1-N SH-UW1 IH0 N-W-AH1-N HH-AE1-N-D TH-EH1 R-W-EH1 R-IH0 NG-W-AH1-N SH-UW1 TH-EH1-R F-R-AH1-S T-R-EY2 T-AH0-D


...they're trying to clean off the other shoe with that stick.

TH-EH1-R T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 K-L-IY1 N-AO1-F DH-AH0 AH1 DH-ER0 SH-UW1 W-IH1-DH DH-AE1-T-S T-IH1-K


so anna who earns £45,000 working in advertising. so essentially she gets paid for finding new ways to irritate us while we're trying to watch tv.

S-OW1 AE1 N-AH0 HH-UW1 ER1-N-Z F-AO1-R T-IY0 F-AY1-V TH-AW1 Z-AH0-N-D P-AW1-N-D Z-W-ER1 K-IH0 NG-IH0 N-AE1-D V-ER0 T-AY2 Z-IH0-NG S-OW1 IH0 S-EH1-N SH-AH0 L-IY0 SH-IY1 G-EH1-T-S P-EY1-D F-AO1-R F-AY1-N D-IH0-NG N-UW1 W-EY1-Z T-UW1 IH1 R-IH0 T-EY2 T-AH1 S-W-AY1 L-W-ER0 T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 W-AA1-CH T-IY1 V-IY1


instead of being grateful for this opportunity to make herself wealthy, whilst being a nuisance...

IH0-N-S T-EH1 D-AH1-V B-IY1 IH0-NG G-R-EY1-T F-AH0-L F-AO1-R DH-IH1 S-AA2 P-ER0 T-UW1 N-AH0 T-IY0 T-UW1 M-EY1-K HH-ER0 S-EH1-L F-W-EH1-L TH-IY0 W-AY1-L-S-T B-IY1 IH0 NG-AH0 N-UW1 S-AH0-N-S


...standard recently. sometimes i think that i'd be better off just giving up my job and living on benefits.

S-T-AE1-N D-ER0 D-R-IY1 S-AH0-N T-L-IY0 S-AH0-M T-AY1-M Z-AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K DH-AE1 T-IH1-D B-IY1 B-EH1 T-ER0 AO1-F JH-AH1-S-T G-IH1 V-IH0 NG-AH1 P-M-AY1 JH-AA1 B-AH0-N D-L-IH1 V-IH0 NG-AA1-N B-EH1 N-AH0 F-IH0-T-S


so we know why anna went into advertising and didn't become an accountant.

S-OW1 W-IY1 N-OW1 W-AY1 AE1 N-AH0 W-EH1-N T-IH0-N T-UW1 AE1-D V-ER0 T-AY2 Z-IH0 NG-AH0-N-D D-IH1 D-AH0-N-T B-IH0 K-AH1 M-AE1 N-AH0 K-AW1-N T-AH0-N-T


yeah, because this kind of magnitude of video c is really rife among the great british public. so...

Y-AE1 B-IH0 K-AO1-Z DH-IH1-S K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-M-AE1 G-N-AH0 T-UW2 D-AH1-V V-IH1 D-IY0 OW0 S-IY1 IH1 Z-R-IH1 L-IY0 R-AY1 F-AH0 M-AH1-NG DH-AH0 G-R-EY1-T B-R-IH1 T-IH0-SH P-AH1 B-L-IH0-K S-OW1


...crazy. so i logged on to...

K-R-EY1 Z-IY0 S-OW1 AY1 L-AO1-G D-AA1-N T-UW1


...nhs citizen recently, nhs citizen is just probably like the biggest participation initiative you've never heard of...

N-IY1-Z S-IH1 T-AH0 Z-AH0 N-R-IY1 S-AH0-N T-L-IY0 N-IY1-Z S-IH1 T-AH0 Z-AH0 N-IH1-Z JH-AH1-S-T P-R-AA1 B-AH0 B-L-IY0 L-AY1-K DH-AH0 B-IH1 G-AH0-S-T P-AA0-R T-IH2 S-AH0 P-EY1 SH-AH0 N-IH0 N-IH1 SH-AH0 T-IH0 V-Y-UW1 V-N-EH1 V-ER0 HH-ER1 D-AH1-V


...and to create this participation architecture. so that you can get involved in shaping the healthcare system in this country. not that you care.

AH0-N-D T-UW1 K-R-IY0 EY1-T DH-IH1-S P-AA0-R T-IH2 S-AH0 P-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AA1-R K-AH0 T-EH2-K CH-ER0 S-OW1 DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 K-AE1-N G-EH1 T-IH0-N V-AA1-L-V D-IH0-N SH-EY1 P-IH0-NG DH-AH0 HH-EH1-L-TH K-EH2-R S-IH1-S T-AH0 M-IH0-N DH-IH1-S K-AH1-N T-R-IY0 N-AA1-T DH-AE1 T-Y-UW1 K-EH1-R


and so they weren't seen as controlling the process, nhs, england...

AH0-N-D S-OW1 DH-EY1 W-EH1 R-AH0-N-T S-IY1 N-AE1-Z K-AH0-N T-R-OW1 L-IH0-NG DH-AH0 P-R-AA1 S-EH2 S-N-IY1 Z-IH1-NG G-L-AH0-N-D


...participation, nonprofit organizations, and i played a very small role in this. so i thought i'd log on and see...

P-AA0-R T-IH2 S-AH0 P-EY1 SH-AH0-N N-AA0-N P-R-AA1 F-AH0 T-AO2-R G-AH0 N-AH0 Z-EY1 SH-AH0-N Z-AH0-N D-AY1 P-L-EY1 D-AH0 V-EH1 R-IY0 S-M-AO1-L R-OW1 L-IH0-N DH-IH1-S S-OW1 AY1 TH-AO1 T-IH1 D-L-AO1 G-AA1 N-AH0-N-D S-IY1


...how it was going, see what's happening on the website. and so the first issue throughout...

HH-AW1 IH1 T-W-AA1-Z G-OW1 IH0-NG S-IY1 W-AH0-T-S HH-AE1 P-AH0 N-IH0 NG-AA1-N DH-AH0 W-EH1-B S-AY2 T-AH0-N-D S-OW1 DH-AH0 F-ER1-S T-IH1 SH-UW0 TH-R-UW0 AW1-T


...that i clicked on. essentially, it was mainly populated by conspiracy theory nuts.

DH-AE1 T-AY1 K-L-IH1-K T-AA1 N-IH0 S-EH1-N SH-AH0 L-IY0 IH1 T-W-AA1 Z-M-EY1 N-L-IY0 P-AA1 P-Y-AH0 L-EY2 T-AH0-D B-AY1 K-AH0-N-S P-IH1 R-AH0 S-IY0 TH-IH1 R-IY0 N-AH1-T-S


and so one poster complaint, i get the feeling that...

AH0-N-D S-OW1 W-AH1-N P-OW1-S T-ER0 K-AH0-M P-L-EY1-N T-AY1 G-EH1-T DH-AH0 F-IY1 L-IH0-NG DH-AE1-T


...nhs platform always respond to these people with politeness and thank them for their contributions.

N-IY1-Z P-L-AE1-T F-AO2-R M-AO1 L-W-EY2 Z-R-IH0-S P-AA1-N-D T-UW1 DH-IY1-Z P-IY1 P-AH0 L-W-IH1-DH P-AH0 L-AY1 T-N-AH0 S-AH0-N-D TH-AE1-NG-K DH-EH1-M F-AO1-R DH-EH1-R K-AA2-N T-R-AH0 B-Y-UW1 SH-AH0-N-Z


depressing vignette for the inability of participatory democracy to deal with weirdos.

D-IH0 P-R-EH1 S-IH0-NG V-IH0 N-Y-EH1-T F-AO1-R DH-AH0 IH2 N-AH0 B-IH1 L-IH0 T-IY0 AH1-V P-AA2-R T-IH1 S-AH0 P-AH0 T-AO2 R-IY0 D-IH0 M-AA1 K-R-AH0 S-IY0 T-UW1 D-IY1 L-W-IH1 DH-W-IH1-R D-OW0-Z


...stupid and crazy. but i saved the worst to the last.

S-T-UW1 P-AH0 D-AH0-N-D K-R-EY1 Z-IY0 B-AH1 T-AY1 S-EY1-V-D DH-AH0 W-ER1-S-T T-UW1 DH-AH0 L-AE1-S-T


...12 past 8. wonder for instance, recognizes the informal care work...

P-OY1-N T-W-AH1-N T-UW1 P-AE1-S T-EY1 T-W-AH1-N D-ER0 F-AO1 R-IH1-N-S T-AH0-N S-R-EH1 K-AH0 G-N-AY2 Z-AH0-Z DH-AH0 IH0-N F-AO1-R M-AH0-L K-EH1 R-W-ER1-K


it is mainly carried out by women in our society. and so currently goes unrewarded or no, yeah.

IH1 T-IH1 Z-M-EY1 N-L-IY0 K-AE1 R-IY0 D-AW1-T B-AY1 W-IH1 M-AH0 N-IH0 N-AW1 ER0 S-AH0 S-AY1 AH0 T-IY0 AH0-N-D S-OW1 K-ER1 AH0-N T-L-IY0 G-OW1 Z-AH0 N-R-AH1 F-R-IH0 D-AO1-R N-OW1 Y-AE1


whether they've seen what a cesspool of vitriol, what often is, i mean, has anyone ever looked...

W-EH1 DH-ER0 DH-EY1-V S-IY1 N-W-AH1 T-AH0 S-EH1-S P-UW2 L-AH1-V V-IH1 T-R-IY0 AH0 L-W-AH1 T-AO1 F-AH0 N-IH1 Z-AY1 M-IY1-N HH-AE1 Z-EH1 N-IY0 W-AH2 N-EH1 V-ER0 L-UH1-K-T


..at a youtube video, read the comments underneath and thought...

AE1 T-AH0 Y-UW1 T-UW2-B V-IH1 D-IY0 OW0 R-IY1-D DH-AH0 K-AA1 M-EH0-N-T S-AH2-N D-ER0 N-IY1 TH-AH0-N-D TH-AO1-T


...and sometimes i do wonder where do i spend all my time...

AH0-N-D S-AH0-M T-AY1-M Z-AY1 D-UW1 W-AH1-N D-ER0 W-EH1-R D-UW1 AY1-S P-EH1-N D-AO1-L M-AY1 T-AY1-M


...but it does avoid some of the issues i've been talking about this evening.

B-AH1 T-IH1-T D-AH1 Z-AH0 V-OY1-D S-AH1 M-AH1-V DH-AH0 IH1 SH-UW0 Z-AY1-V B-IH1-N T-AO1 K-IH0 NG-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-IH1 S-IY1 V-N-IH0-NG


so when you involve women in well-structured discussion processes...

S-OW1 W-EH1 N-Y-UW1 IH0-N V-AA1-L V-W-IH1 M-AH0 N-IH0 N-W-EH1-L-S T-R-AH2-K T-ER0-D D-IH0-S K-AH1 SH-AH0-N P-R-AO2 S-EH1 S-AH0-Z


they generally don't get grave threats and death threats.

DH-EY1 JH-EH1 N-ER0 AH0 L-IY0 D-AA1-N-T G-EH1-T G-R-EY1-V TH-R-EH1-T S-AH0-N-D D-EH1-TH TH-R-EH1-T-S


...some research evidence in a lot of different fields. so if you bring together diverse groups of people with different experiences and different views...

S-AH1 M-R-IY0 S-ER1 CH-EH1 V-AH0 D-AH0-N S-IH0 N-AH0 L-AA1 T-AH1-V D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N-T F-IY1-L-D-Z S-OW1 IH1 F-Y-UW1 B-R-IH1-NG T-AH0 G-EH1 DH-ER0 D-AY0 V-ER1-S G-R-UW1-P S-AH1-V P-IY1 P-AH0 L-W-IH1-DH D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N T-IH0-K-S P-IH1 R-IY0 AH0-N S-IH0 Z-AH0-N-D D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N-T V-Y-UW1-Z


...they're forced to kind of reflect on those views, explain them to others, take on the point of view of other people. and also kind of...

TH-EH1-R F-AO1-R-S-T T-UW1 K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-R-AH0 F-L-EH1-K T-AA1-N DH-OW1-Z V-Y-UW1 Z-IH0-K-S P-L-EY1-N DH-EH1-M T-UW1 AH1 DH-ER0-Z T-EY1 K-AA1-N DH-AH0 P-OY1-N T-AH1-V V-Y-UW1 AH1 V-AH1 DH-ER0 P-IY1 P-AH0 L-AH0-N D-AO1-L S-OW0 K-AY1-N D-AH1-V


yeah, just kind of think about things a bit more deeply.

Y-AE1 JH-AH1-S-T K-AY1-N D-AH1-V TH-IH1-NG K-AH0 B-AW1-T TH-IH1-NG Z-AH0 B-IH1 T-M-AO1-R D-IY1 P-L-IY0


she is an amazing and brilliant person who...

SH-IY1 IH1 Z-AE1 N-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0 NG-AH0-N-D B-R-IH1 L-Y-AH0-N-T P-ER1 S-AH0-N HH-UW1


...is doing work on understanding religious identification amongst muslim male offenders under probation services. now, if that's not a tragic topic...

IH1-Z D-UW1 IH0 NG-W-ER1 K-AA1 N-AH2-N D-ER0-S T-AE1-N D-IH0 NG-R-IH0 L-IH1 JH-AH0 S-AY0 D-EH2-N T-AH0 F-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH0 M-AH1-NG-S T-M-AH1 Z-L-AH0-M M-EY1 L-AH0 F-EH1-N D-ER0 Z-AH1-N D-ER0 P-R-OW0 B-EY1 SH-AH0-N S-ER1 V-AH0 S-AH0 Z-N-AW1 IH1-F TH-AE1-T S-N-AA1 T-AH0 T-R-AE1 JH-IH0-K T-AA1 P-IH0-K


i find it quite tragic. anything to do with the criminal justice system and its impact on people.

AY1 F-AY1-N D-IH1-T K-W-AY1-T T-R-AE1 JH-IH0 K-EH1 N-IY0 TH-IH2-NG T-UW1 D-UW1 W-IH1-DH DH-AH0 K-R-IH1 M-AH0 N-AH0-L JH-AH1-S T-AH0-S S-IH1-S T-AH0 M-AH0-N D-IH1-T S-IH1-M P-AE0-K T-AA1-N P-IY1 P-AH0-L


she doesn't have a website, but you can look her up on the lsc website. it is the amazing, wonderful lamea.

SH-IY1 D-OW1 S-AH0-N-T HH-AE1 V-AH0 W-EH1-B S-AY2-T B-AH1 T-Y-UW1 K-AE1 N-L-UH1-K HH-ER0 AH1 P-AA1-N DH-AH0 S-EH1 L-EH0-S K-IY0 W-EH1-B S-AY2 T-IH1 T-IH1-Z DH-AH0 AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0 NG-W-AH1-N D-ER0 F-AH0-L L-EY1 M-IY0 AH0


thank you, liz. i think i took the tragedy part a bit too seriously. so if i don't make you laugh, write it off, write me off as the diversity act.

TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 L-IH1 Z-AY1 TH-IH1-NG K-AY1 T-UH1-K DH-AH0 T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 P-AA1-R T-AH0 B-IH1-T T-UW1 S-IH1 R-IY0 AH0 S-L-IY0 S-OW1 IH1 F-AY1 D-AA1-N T-M-EY1 K-Y-UW1 L-AE1 F-R-AY1 T-IH1 T-AO1 F-R-AY1 T-M-IY1 AO1 F-AE1-Z DH-AH0 D-IH0 V-ER1 S-AH0 T-IY0 AE1-K-T


and actually i was taking britain back to the eighties and i mean, i'm not a historian like liz.

AH0-N D-AE1-K CH-AH0 W-AH0 L-IY0 AY1 W-AA1-Z T-EY1 K-IH0-NG B-R-IH1 T-AH0-N B-AE1-K T-UW1 DH-AH0 EY1 T-IY0 Z-AH0-N D-AY1 M-IY1 N-IH1-M N-AA1 T-AH0 HH-IH0-S T-AO1 R-IY0 AH0 N-L-AY1 K-L-IH1-Z


and i'm not a political expert like ricky. so i'm just thinking-

AH0-N D-IH1-M N-AA1 T-AH0 P-AH0 L-IH1 T-AH0 K-AH0 L-EH1-K-S P-ER0 T-L-AY1 K-R-IH1 K-IY0 S-OW1 IH1-M JH-AH1-S-T TH-IH1-NG K-IH0-NG


of this stuff and that, but that's just one kind of.

AH1-V DH-IH1-S-S T-AH1 F-AH0-N-D DH-AE1-T B-AH1-T TH-AE1-T-S JH-AH1-S T-W-AH1-N K-AY1-N D-AH1-V


sample of it. another recent one, is this idea of this kind of refugee crisis. again-

S-AE1-M P-AH0 L-AH1 V-IH1 T-AH0 N-AH1 DH-ER0 R-IY1 S-AH0-N T-W-AH1 N-IH1-Z DH-IH1 S-AY0 D-IY1 AH0 AH1-V DH-IH1-S K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-R-EH1 F-Y-UW0 JH-IY0 K-R-AY1 S-AH0 S-AH0 G-EH1-N


it kind of seemed sensible to me, it's a humanitarian thing. and i thought yes-

IH1-T K-AY1-N D-AH1-V S-IY1-M-D S-EH1-N S-AH0 B-AH0-L T-UW1 M-IY1 IH1-T S-AH0 HH-Y-UW2 M-AE2 N-AH0 T-EH1 R-IY0 AH0-N TH-IH1 NG-AH0-N D-AY1 TH-AO1 T-Y-EH1-S


i don't care about the homeless in the u

AY1 D-AA1-N-T K-EH1 R-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AH0 HH-OW1 M-L-AH0 S-IH0-N DH-AH0 Y-UW1


k, i'm kind of destroying the nhs because suddenly all these people are going to flood in and our.

K-EY1 IH1-M K-AY1-N D-AH1-V D-IH0-S T-R-OY1 IH0-NG DH-AH0 N-IY1-Z B-IH0 K-AO1-Z S-AH1 D-AH0 N-L-IY0 AO1-L DH-IY1-Z P-IY1 P-AH0 L-AA1-R G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 F-L-AH1 D-IH0 N-AH0-N D-AW1 ER0


institutions will be destroyed. i'm letting isol into britain.

IH2-N-S T-IH0 T-UW1 SH-AH0-N Z-W-IH1-L B-IY1 D-IH0-S T-R-OY1 D-IH1 M-L-EH1 T-IH0 NG-AY1 S-AH0 L-IH0-N T-UW1 B-R-IH1 T-AH0-N


the islamification will start and we'll all be dead and all of this stuff. and you're just, and i mean, and that was bad.

DH-AH0 IH2 S-L-AH0 M-AH0 F-IH1-K SH-AH0 N-W-IH1-L-S T-AA1-R T-AH0-N D-W-EH1 L-AO1-L B-IY1 D-EH1 D-AH0-N D-AO1 L-AH1-V DH-IH1-S-S T-AH1 F-AH0-N D-Y-UH1-R JH-AH1-S T-AH0-N D-AY1 M-IY1 N-AH0-N-D DH-AE1 T-W-AA1-Z B-AE1-D


enough and that's kind of like going here, but then i made an even bigger mistake and i went and i said, well, you know, and again-

IH0 N-AH1 F-AH0-N-D TH-AE1-T-S K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-L-AY1-K G-OW1 IH0-NG HH-IY1-R B-AH1-T DH-EH1 N-AY1 M-EY1 D-AE1 N-IY1 V-IH0-N B-IH1 G-ER0 M-IH0-S T-EY1 K-AH0-N D-AY1 W-EH1-N T-AH0-N D-AY1 S-EH1 D-W-EH1 L-Y-UW1 N-OW1 AH0-N D-AH0 G-EH1-N


and suddenly i had another different kind of barrage coming at me from a different group and they're just like, oh, you've become too.

AH0-N-D S-AH1 D-AH0 N-L-IY0 AY1 HH-AE1 D-AH0 N-AH1 DH-ER0 D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N-T K-AY1-N D-AH1-V B-ER0 AA1-ZH K-AH1 M-IH0 NG-AE1 T-M-IY1 F-R-AH1 M-AH0 D-IH1 F-ER0 AH0-N-T G-R-UW1 P-AH0-N-D TH-EH1-R JH-AH1-S T-L-AY1 K-OW1 Y-UW1-V B-IH0 K-AH1-M T-UW1


western. and you don't remember, you don't know anything about [inaudible 00:01:46] demographics-

W-EH1-S T-ER0 N-AH0-N D-Y-UW1 D-AA1-N T-R-IH0 M-EH1-M B-ER0 Y-UW1 D-AA1-N T-N-OW1 EH1 N-IY0 TH-IH2 NG-AH0 B-AW1 T-IH0 N-AO1 D-AH0 B-AH0-L Z-IH1 R-OW0 AW1 ER0 Z-W-AH1-N M-IH1 N-AH0 T-AH0-N-D F-AO1-R T-IY0 S-IH1-K-S S-EH1 K-AH0-N-D-Z D-EH2 M-AH0 G-R-AE1 F-IH0-K-S


and suddenly, and they go, you europeans, you're just crybabies. and that suddenly became a moment, which i was like, while i've never been called european before.

AH0-N-D S-AH1 D-AH0 N-L-IY0 AH0-N-D DH-EY1 G-OW1 Y-UW1 Y-UH2 R-AH0 P-IY1 AH0-N Z-Y-UH1-R JH-AH1-S-T K-R-AY1 B-EY2 B-IY0 Z-AH0-N-D DH-AE1-T S-AH1 D-AH0 N-L-IY0 B-IH0 K-EY1 M-AH0 M-OW1 M-AH0-N T-W-IH1 CH-AY1 W-AA1 Z-L-AY1 K-W-AY1 L-AY1 V-N-EH1 V-ER0 B-IH1-N K-AO1-L D-Y-UH2 R-AH0 P-IY1 AH0-N B-IH0 F-AO1-R


i've lived here for 15 years, but no one's ever called me european before.

AY1 V-L-AY1-V-D HH-IY1-R F-AO1-R F-IH0-F T-IY1 N-Y-IH1-R-Z B-AH1 T-N-OW1 W-AH1-N Z-EH1 V-ER0 K-AO1-L D-M-IY1 Y-UH2 R-AH0 P-IY1 AH0-N B-IH0 F-AO1-R


i kind of arrived at some kind of significant thing. and-

AY1 K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-ER0 AY1-V D-AE1-T S-AH1-M K-AY1-N D-AH1-V S-AH0 G-N-IH1 F-IH0 K-AH0-N-T TH-IH1 NG-AH0-N-D


that edl and the bnp never took hold of that kind of idea.

DH-AE1 T-EH1 D-AH0 L-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 B-IY1 P-IY1 N-EH1 V-ER0 T-UH1-K HH-OW1-L D-AH1-V DH-AE1-T K-AY1-N D-AH1 V-AY0 D-IY1 AH0


hello? any teachers here? getting good and pissed.

HH-AH0 L-OW1 EH1 N-IY0 T-IY1 CH-ER0-Z HH-IY1-R G-EH1 T-IH0-NG G-UH1 D-AH0-N-D P-IH1-S-T


it's friday isn't it? okay.

IH1-T-S F-R-AY1 D-IY0 IH1 S-AH0-N T-IH1 T-OW2 K-EY1


i'm going to start with the teenage syllogism.

IH1-M G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1-S T-AA1-R T-W-IH1-DH DH-AH0 T-IY1 N-EY2-JH S-IH1 L-OW0 G-IH2 Z-AH0-M


i didn't do it. and i wasn't the only one.

AY1 D-IH1 D-AH0-N-T D-UW1 IH1 T-AH0-N D-AY1 W-AO1-S-T DH-AH0 OW1 N-L-IY0 W-AH1-N


so optimistic. i mean, they really think it's going to work. and then they think if that doesn't work.

S-OW1 AA2-P T-AH0 M-IH1-S T-IH0 K-AY1 M-IY1-N DH-EY1 R-IH1 L-IY0 TH-IH1-NG K-IH1-T-S G-OW1 IH0-NG T-UW1 W-ER1 K-AH0-N-D DH-EH1-N DH-EY1 TH-IH1-NG K-IH1-F DH-AE1-T D-OW1 S-AH0-N T-W-ER1-K


i could be well moved if i were, as you are. and then they all stab them to death.

AY1 K-UH1-D B-IY1 W-EH1-L M-UW1-V D-IH1 F-AY1 W-ER0 AE1 Z-Y-UW1 AA1 R-AH0-N-D DH-EH1-N DH-EY1 AO1-L-S T-AE1-B DH-EH1-M T-UW1 D-EH1-TH


and that's basically my job. thanks, i've been robbed, no.

AH0-N-D TH-AE1-T-S B-EY1 S-IH0 K-L-IY0 M-AY1 JH-AA1-B TH-AE1-NG-K S-AY1-V B-IH1 N-R-AA1-B D-N-OW1


and why the writer of the question has used the word-

AH0-N D-W-AY1 DH-AH0 R-AY1 T-ER0 AH1-V DH-AH0 K-W-EH1-S CH-AH0-N HH-AE1 Z-Y-UW1-Z-D DH-AH0 W-ER1-D


-want to tell the stories about the kids. and i've shit home lives.

W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 T-EH1-L DH-AH0-S T-AO1 R-IY0 Z-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AH0 K-IH1-D Z-AH0-N D-AY1-V SH-IH1-T HH-OW1 M-L-IH1-V-Z


i mean, they do have shit home lives. now i give him one of these, which is a report. and i say, report to me, report to me everyday, tell me how your lessons went. and they might, and they do.

AY1 M-IY1-N DH-EY1 D-UW1 HH-AE1-V SH-IH1-T HH-OW1 M-L-IH1-V Z-N-AW1 AY1 G-IH1-V HH-IH1 M-W-AH1 N-AH1-V DH-IY1 Z-W-IH1 CH-IH1 Z-AH0 R-IY0 P-AO1-R T-AH0-N D-AY1 S-EY1 R-IY0 P-AO1-R-T T-UW1 M-IY1 R-IY0 P-AO1-R-T T-UW1 M-IY1 EH1 V-R-IY0 D-EY1 T-EH1-L M-IY1 HH-AW1 Y-AO1-R L-EH1 S-AH0-N Z-W-EH1-N T-AH0-N-D DH-EY1 M-AY1 T-AH0-N-D DH-EY1 D-UW1


they tell me how their lessons go, but-

DH-EY1 T-EH1-L M-IY1 HH-AW1 DH-EH1-R L-EH1 S-AH0-N-Z G-OW1 B-AH1-T


-the most important thing to me is that they're really funny and that i like seeing them. and-

DH-AH0 M-OW1-S T-IH0-M P-AO1-R T-AH0-N-T TH-IH1-NG T-UW1 M-IY1 IH1-Z DH-AE1-T TH-EH1-R R-IH1 L-IY0 F-AH1 N-IY0 AH0-N-D DH-AE1 T-AY1 L-AY1-K S-IY1 IH0-NG DH-EH1 M-AH0-N-D


one thing i do want to talk about is how annoying it is that they make films about teaching. when no one ever has to sit in a two hour staff meeting-

W-AH1-N TH-IH1 NG-AY1 D-UW1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 T-AO1 K-AH0 B-AW1 T-IH1-Z HH-AW1 AH0 N-OY1 IH0 NG-IH1 T-IH1-Z DH-AE1-T DH-EY1 M-EY1-K F-IH1-L-M Z-AH0 B-AW1-T T-IY1 CH-IH0 NG-W-EH1-N N-OW1 W-AH1 N-EH1 V-ER0 HH-AE1-Z T-UW1 S-IH1 T-IH0 N-AH0 T-UW1 AW1 ER0-S T-AE1 F-M-IY1 T-IH0-NG


remember that most children are tiny, x-box obsessed terrorists, and should be treated accordingly. number seven-

R-IH0 M-EH1-M B-ER0 DH-AE1 T-M-OW1-S-T CH-IH1-L D-R-AH0 N-AA1-R T-AY1 N-IY0-Z B-AA1-K S-AH0-B S-EH1-S-T T-EH1 R-ER0 AH0-S-T S-AH0-N-D SH-UH1-D B-IY1 T-R-IY1 T-AH0 D-AH0 K-AO1-R D-IH0 NG-L-IY0 N-AH1-M B-ER0 S-EH1 V-AH0-N


don't be afraid of asking for support from people who are more british than you are.

D-AA1-N-T B-IY1 AH0 F-R-EY1 D-AH1 V-AE1-S K-IH0-NG F-AO1-R S-AH0 P-AO1-R-T F-R-AH1-M P-IY1 P-AH0-L HH-UW1 AA1-R M-AO1-R B-R-IH1 T-IH0-SH DH-AE1 N-Y-UW1 AA1-R


that's it for tragic schooling. and that's it from me.

TH-AE1-T S-IH1-T F-AO1-R T-R-AE1 JH-IH0-K-S K-UW1 L-IH0 NG-AH0-N-D TH-AE1-T S-IH1-T F-R-AH1-M M-IY1


some of us have to go and finish a phd.

S-AH1 M-AH1 V-AH1-S HH-AE1-V T-UW1 G-OW1 AH0-N-D F-IH1 N-IH0 SH-AH0 F-IH1-D-Z


it's these guys, it's not me.

IH1-T-S DH-IY1-Z G-AY1 Z-IH1-T S-N-AA1 T-M-IY1


i just want to say thank you for the last four years.

AY1 JH-AH1-S T-W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 S-EY1 TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 F-AO1-R DH-AH0 L-AE1-S-T F-AO1 R-Y-IH1-R-Z


it's been amazing. it's been wonderful. it's been a family.

IH1-T-S B-IH1 N-AH0 M-EY1 Z-IH0 NG-IH1-T-S B-IH1 N-W-AH1-N D-ER0 F-AH0 L-IH1-T-S B-IH1 N-AH0 F-AE1 M-AH0 L-IY0


it's a chance for me to explore, to grow and to be my other self, who isn't just that academic.

IH1-T S-AH0 CH-AE1-N-S F-AO1-R M-IY1 T-UW1 IH0-K-S P-L-AO1-R T-UW1 G-R-OW1 AH0-N-D T-UW1 B-IY1 M-AY1 AH1 DH-ER0 S-EH1-L-F HH-UW1 IH1 S-AH0-N-T JH-AH1-S-T DH-AE1 T-AE2 K-AH0 D-EH1 M-IH0-K


thank you for all that. and i look forward to everything you do in the future. so i guess after a short break of 10.

TH-AE1-NG K-Y-UW1 F-AO1 R-AO1-L DH-AE1 T-AH0-N D-AY1 L-UH1-K F-AO1 R-W-ER0-D T-UW1 EH1 V-R-IY0 TH-IH2 NG-Y-UW1 D-UW1 IH0-N DH-AH0 F-Y-UW1 CH-ER0 S-OW1 AY1 G-EH1 S-AE1-F T-ER0 AH0 SH-AO1-R-T B-R-EY1 K-AH1-V T-EH1-N


stand up for tragedy on twitter @standup4tragedy.

S-T-AE1-N D-AH1-P F-AO1-R T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 AA1-N T-W-IH1 T-ER0-S T-AE1-N D-AH2-P F-AO1-R T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0


the tragedy on facebook to stay up dated for all of the shows that are coming up.

DH-AH0 T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0 AA1-N F-EY1-S B-UH2-K T-UW1-S T-EY1 AH1-P D-EY1 T-IH0-D F-AO1 R-AO1 L-AH1-V DH-AH0 SH-OW1-Z DH-AE1 T-AA1-R K-AH1 M-IH0 NG-AH1-P


yeah. yeah. so we gave them a whole act and we don't really have bands.

Y-AE1 Y-AE1 S-OW1 W-IY1 G-EY1-V DH-EH1 M-AH0 HH-OW1 L-AE1-K T-AH0-N D-W-IY1 D-AA1-N T-R-IH1 L-IY0 HH-AE1-V B-AE1-N-D-Z


yeah. there's loads of them.luckily you're used to that.yeah.because we used to be in a band together, which was a big band. so at least you had that.and now we're good to-

Y-AE1 DH-EH1-R Z-L-OW1-D Z-AH1-V TH-EH1 M-L-UW0 K-L-IY0 Y-UH1 R-Y-UW1-Z-D T-UW1 TH-EY1 CH-AH0 W-AH0 B-AA1 K-IY2 S-W-IY1 Y-UW1-S-T T-UW1 B-IY1 IH0 N-AH0 B-AE1-N-D T-AH0 G-EH1 DH-ER0 W-IH1 CH-W-AA1 Z-AH0 B-IH1-G B-AE1-N-D S-OW1 AE1 T-L-IY1-S T-Y-UW1 HH-AE1-D TH-AE1 T-AH0-N D-N-AW1 W-ER0 G-UH1-D T-UW1


yeah, i think so.yeah. we all saw his edinburgh show.

Y-AE1 AY1 TH-IH1-NG-K S-Y-OW1 Y-EH1 W-IY1 AO1-L S-AO1 HH-IH1 Z-EH1 D-AH0-N B-ER0 OW0 SH-OW1


stephanie was one of my favorites i saw this year.

S-T-EH1 F-AH0 N-IY0 W-AA1 Z-W-AH1 N-AH1 V-M-AY1 F-EY1 V-ER0 IH0-T S-AY1 S-AO1 DH-IH1 S-Y-IH1-R


so i brought a christmas cracker. so lucy, can i pop this christmas cracker with you?

S-OW1 AY1 B-R-AO1 T-AH0 K-R-IH1 S-M-AH0-S K-R-AE1 K-ER0 S-OW1 L-UW1 S-IY0 K-AE1 N-AY1 P-AA1-P DH-IH1-S K-R-IH1 S-M-AH0-S K-R-AE1 K-ER0 W-IH1 DH-Y-UW1


was when theresa may was appointed minister, home secretary. and also minister.

W-AA1 Z-W-EH1-N T-ER0 IY1 S-AH0 M-EY1 W-AA1 Z-AH0 P-OY1-N T-AH0 D-M-IH1 N-AH0-S T-ER0 HH-OW1-M S-EH1 K-R-AH0 T-EH2 R-IY0 AH0-N D-AO1-L S-OW0 M-IH1 N-AH0-S T-ER0


...for women, lol, and equalities-

F-AO1 R-W-IH1 M-AH0 N-L-OW1 L-AH0-N D-IH0 K-W-AA1 L-AH0 T-IY0-Z


...almost two years ago and terrifyingly almost everything in it it-

AO1-L M-OW2-S-T T-UW1 Y-IH1-R Z-AH0 G-OW1 AH0-N-D T-EH1 R-AH0 F-AY2 IH0 NG-L-IY0 AO1-L M-OW2-S T-EH1 V-R-IY0 TH-IH2 NG-IH0 N-IH1 T-IH1-T


... come true. this is called farewell to welfare. my name is grace petrie, feel free to follow me on twitter if you want to know about the-

K-AH1-M T-R-UW1 DH-IH1 S-IH1-Z K-AO1-L-D F-EH2 R-W-EH1-L T-UW1 W-EH1-L F-EH2-R M-AY1 N-EY1 M-IH1-Z G-R-EY1-S P-EH1 T-R-IY0 F-IY1-L F-R-IY1 T-UW1 F-AA1 L-OW0 M-IY1 AA1-N T-W-IH1 T-ER0 IH1 F-Y-UW1 W-AA1-N-T T-UW1 N-OW1 AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AH0


...the routine of their day, they really came for a laugh. so they were really up for helping out, but they gave us the single sheet of paper, the minimum-

DH-AH0 R-UW0 T-IY1 N-AH1-V DH-EH1-R D-EY1 DH-EY1 R-IH1 L-IY0 K-EY1-M F-AO1 R-AH0 L-AE1-F S-OW1 DH-EY1 W-ER0 R-IH1 L-IY0 AH1-P F-AO1-R HH-EH1-L P-IH0 NG-AW1-T B-AH1-T DH-EY1 G-EY1 V-AH1-S DH-AH0 S-IH1-NG G-AH0-L SH-IY1 T-AH1-V P-EY1 P-ER0 DH-AH0 M-IH1 N-AH0 M-AH0-M


...form you had to fill in to arrange a cremation. then we filled it-

F-AO1-R M-Y-UW1 HH-AE1-D T-UW1 F-IH1 L-IH0-N T-UW1 ER0 EY1-N JH-AH0 K-R-IY0 M-EY1 SH-AH0-N DH-EH1 N-W-IY1 F-IH1-L D-IH1-T


...and the last line just read-

AH0-N-D DH-AH0 L-AE1-S T-L-AY1-N JH-AH1-S T-R-EH1-D


...death certificates. and we couldn't tick that box.

D-EH1-TH S-ER0 T-IH1 F-IH0 K-AH0-T S-AH0-N D-W-IY1 K-AW1-L D-AH0-N-T T-IH1-K DH-AE1-T B-AA1-K-S


...we'd never been in any doubt that the mummy was dead.

W-EH1 D-N-EH1 V-ER0 B-IH1 N-IH0 N-EH1 N-IY0 D-AW1-T DH-AE1-T DH-AH0 M-AH1 M-IY0 W-AA1-Z D-EH1-D


so then we had to drive from, we went from gp surgery to gp surgery, trying to find anyone who was qualified to complete a death certificate.

S-OW1 DH-EH1 N-W-IY1 HH-AE1-D T-UW1 D-R-AY1-V F-R-AH1 M-W-IY1 W-EH1-N-T F-R-AH1 M-EH1-G P-IY1 EH1-S S-ER1 JH-ER0 IY0 T-UW1 EH1-G P-IY1 EH1-S S-ER1 JH-ER0 IY0 T-R-AY1 IH0-NG T-UW1 F-AY1-N D-EH1 N-IY0 W-AH2-N HH-UW1 W-AA1-Z K-W-AA1 L-AH0 F-AY2-D T-UW1 K-AH0-M P-L-IY1 T-AH0 D-EH1-TH S-ER0 T-IH1 F-IH0 K-EY2-T


...and doctors, unlike crematorium stuff,-

AH0-N-D D-AA1-K T-ER0 Z-AH0 N-L-AY1-K K-R-IY0 M-AH0 T-AO1 R-IY0 AH0-M-S T-AH1-F


do not like the routine of their days interrupted by zany museum stories.

D-UW1 N-AA1 T-L-AY1-K DH-AH0 R-UW0 T-IY1 N-AH1-V DH-EH1-R D-EY1 Z-IH2-N T-ER0 AH1-P T-IH0-D B-AY1 Z-EY1 N-IY0 M-Y-UW0 Z-IY1 AH0-M-S T-AO1 R-IY0-Z


so they kept moving us along. and the sun beat down on the big blue fun bus turned into an oven and in the boot-

S-OW1 DH-EY1 K-EH1-P T-M-UW1 V-IH0 NG-AH1 S-AH0 L-AO1 NG-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 S-AH1-N B-IY1-T D-AW1 N-AA1-N DH-AH0 B-IH1-G B-L-UW1 F-AH1-N B-AH1-S T-ER1-N D-IH0-N T-UW1 AE1 N-AH1 V-AH0 N-AH0-N D-IH0-N DH-AH0 B-UW1-T


...the mummy was suppurating and the yellow liquid was pooling and pouring out of the black bin bags. and inside the van, the air was turning from rancid-

DH-AH0 M-AH1 M-IY0 W-AA1-Z S-AH1 P-ER0 EY2 T-IH0 NG-AH0-N-D DH-AH0 Y-EH1 L-OW0 L-IH1 K-W-AH0 D-W-AA1-Z P-UW1 L-IH0 NG-AH0-N-D P-AO1 R-IH0 NG-AW1 T-AH1-V DH-AH0 B-L-AE1-K B-IH1-N B-AE1-G Z-AH0-N D-IH0-N S-AY1-D DH-AH0 V-AE1-N DH-AH0 EH1 R-W-AA1-Z T-ER1 N-IH0-NG F-R-AH1 M-R-AE1-N S-IH0-D


...to unbearable. we would have to park up every 20 or so meters to go staggering out and-

T-UW1 AH0-N B-EH1 R-AH0 B-AH0 L-W-IY1 W-UH1-D HH-AE1-V T-UW1 P-AA1-R K-AH1 P-EH1 V-ER0 IY0 T-W-EH1-N T-IY0 AO1-R S-OW1 M-IY1 T-ER0-Z T-UW1 G-OW1-S T-AE1 G-ER0 IH0 NG-AW1 T-AH0-N-D


...get a fresh lung full of air.

G-EH1 T-AH0 F-R-EH1 SH-L-AH1-NG F-UH1 L-AH1 V-EH1-R


we did find someone who filled in the certificate. they wafted a stethoscope in the vague direction of the bin bags. and then we went back to the crematorium-

W-IY1 D-IH1-D F-AY1-N-D S-AH1 M-W-AH2-N HH-UW1 F-IH1-L D-IH0-N DH-AH0 S-ER0 T-IH1 F-IH0 K-EY2-T DH-EY1 W-AA1-F T-IH0 D-AH0-S T-EH1 TH-AH0-S K-OW2 P-IH0-N DH-AH0 V-EY1-G D-ER0 EH1-K SH-AH0 N-AH1-V DH-AH0 B-IH1-N B-AE1-G Z-AH0-N-D DH-EH1 N-W-IY1 W-EH1-N-T B-AE1-K T-UW1 DH-AH0 K-R-IY0 M-AH0 T-AO1 R-IY0 AH0-M


...the funeral pyres were fired up and we scattered the mummies actions to the winds.

DH-AH0 F-Y-UW1 N-ER0 AH0-L P-AY1 ER0 Z-W-ER0 F-AY1 ER0 D-AH1 P-AH0-N D-W-IY1-S K-AE1 T-ER0-D DH-AH0 M-AH1 M-IY0 Z-AE1-K SH-AH0-N-Z T-UW1 DH-AH0 W-IH1-N-D-Z


the museum's closed down now. there's your tragedy.

DH-AH0 M-Y-UW0 Z-IY1 AH0-M-Z K-L-OW1-Z-D D-AW1-N N-AW1 DH-EH1-R Z-Y-AO1-R T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0


there was successive years of council cuts. and culture's a very easy offering on the altar of austerity.

DH-EH1 R-W-AA1-Z S-AH0-K S-EH1 S-IH0 V-Y-IH1-R Z-AH1-V K-AW1-N S-AH0-L K-AH1-T S-AH0-N-D K-AH1-L CH-ER0 Z-AH0 V-EH1 R-IY0 IY1 Z-IY0 AO1 F-ER0 IH0 NG-AA1-N DH-AH0 AO1-L T-ER0 AH1 V-AO2-S T-EH1 R-IH0 T-IY0


maybe the tax payers shouldn't be paying for rivets and fiberglass pillar boxes and-

M-EY1 B-IY0 DH-AH0 T-AE1-K-S P-EY1 ER0-Z SH-OW1-L T-AH0-N-T B-IY1 P-EY1 IH0-NG F-AO1-R R-IH1 V-AH0-T S-AH0-N-D F-AY1 B-ER0 G-L-AE2-S P-IH1 L-ER0 B-AA1-K S-AH0 Z-AH0-N-D


... and if i really wanted to leave you in that tragic space, i'd stop.

AH0-N D-IH1 F-AY1 R-IH1 L-IY0 W-AA1-N T-AH0-D T-UW1 L-IY1 V-Y-UW1 IH0-N DH-AE1-T T-R-AE1 JH-IH0-K-S P-EY1 S-IH1-D-S T-AA1-P


i'm quite interested in education and kind of tying in with a theme of tragedy,-

IH1-M K-W-AY1 T-IH1-N T-R-AH0-S T-AH0 D-IH0 N-EH2 JH-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0 N-AH0-N-D K-AY1-N D-AH1-V T-AY1 IH0 NG-IH0 N-W-IH1 DH-AH0 TH-IY1 M-AH1-V T-R-AE1 JH-AH0 D-IY0


...our current education secretary, nicky morgan, has this rhetoric that she trips out quite a lot about the idea of gcse students studying arts and humanities subjects.

AW1 ER0 K-ER1 AH0-N T-EH2 JH-AH0 K-EY1 SH-AH0-N S-EH1 K-R-AH0 T-EH2 R-IY0 N-IH1 K-IY0 M-AO1-R G-AH0-N HH-AE1-Z DH-IH1 S-R-EH1 T-ER0 IH0-K DH-AE1-T SH-IY1 T-R-IH1-P S-AW1-T K-W-AY1 T-AH0 L-AA1 T-AH0 B-AW1-T DH-AH0 AY0 D-IY1 AH0 AH1-V G-EH1-S-S T-UW1 D-AH0-N-T-S-S T-AH1 D-IY0 IH0 NG-AA1-R-T S-AH0-N-D HH-Y-UW0 M-AE1 N-IH0 T-IY0-Z S-AH1-B JH-IH0-K-T-S


she says that if you are 15 years old and you choose to study in arts and humanities,-

SH-IY1 S-EH1-Z DH-AE1 T-IH1 F-Y-UW1 AA1-R F-IH0-F T-IY1 N-Y-IH1-R Z-OW1-L D-AH0-N D-Y-UW1 CH-UW1-Z T-UW1-S T-AH1 D-IY0 IH0 N-AA1-R-T S-AH0-N-D HH-Y-UW0 M-AE1 N-IH0 T-IY0-Z


...and i kind of think that, without wanting to be melodramatic about it, to say that sort of thing to a 14 year old, who just wants to study art because he likes art or wants to study music, because she likes music-

AH0-N D-AY1 K-AY1-N D-AH1-V TH-IH1-NG-K DH-AE1 T-W-IH0 TH-AW1 T-W-AA1-N T-IH0-NG T-UW1 B-IY1 M-EH2 L-AH0 D-R-AH0 M-AE1 T-IH0 K-AH0 B-AW1 T-IH1-T T-UW1 S-EY1 DH-AE1-T S-AO1-R T-AH1-V TH-IH1-NG T-UW1 AH0 F-AO1-R T-IY1 N-Y-IH1 R-OW1-L-D HH-UW1 JH-AH1-S T-W-AA1-N-T-S T-UW1-S T-AH1 D-IY0 AA1-R-T B-IH0 K-AO1-Z HH-IY1 L-AY1-K S-AA1-R T-AO1 R-W-AA1-N-T-S T-UW1-S T-AH1 D-IY0 M-Y-UW1 Z-IH0-K B-IH0 K-AO1-Z SH-IY1 L-AY1-K S-M-Y-UW1 Z-IH0-K


...is really mean and really cruel. and so i wrote a poem about it and it's called held back by nicky morgan.

IH1 Z-R-IH1 L-IY0 M-IY1 N-AH0-N D-R-IH1 L-IY0 K-R-UW1 AH0 L-AH0-N-D S-OW1 AY1 R-OW1 T-AH0 P-OW1 AH0 M-AH0 B-AW1 T-IH1 T-AH0-N D-IH1-T-S K-AO1-L-D HH-EH1-L-D B-AE1-K B-AY1 N-IH1 K-IY0 M-AO1-R G-AH0-N


the lights have come up. empty plastic wine glasses litter the floor.

DH-AH0 L-AY1-T-S HH-AE1-V K-AH1 M-AH1 P-EH1-M-P T-IY0 P-L-AE1-S T-IH0 K-W-AY1-N G-L-AE1 S-AH0 Z-L-IH1 T-ER0 DH-AH0 F-L-AO1-R


...no it's my job. "no way", he says. "you get paid for this?".

N-OW1 IH1-T S-M-AY1 JH-AA1 B-N-OW1 W-EY1 HH-IY1 S-EH1 Z-Y-UW1 G-EH1-T P-EY1-D F-AO1-R DH-IH1-S


"there are kids starving in the world and whilst we pay our taxes,"-

DH-EH1 R-AA1-R K-IH1-D-Z-S T-AA1-R V-IH0 NG-IH0-N DH-AH0 W-ER1-L D-AH0-N D-W-AY1-L-S T-W-IY1 P-EY1 AW1 ER0 T-AE1-K S-AH0-Z


"...you ponce about on stage". his argument is nonsensical and it's flawed-

Y-UW1 P-OW1-N S-EY0 AH0 B-AW1 T-AA1-N-S T-EY1-JH HH-IH1 Z-AA1-R G-Y-AH0 M-AH0-N T-IH1 Z-N-AA0-N S-EH1-N S-IH0 K-AH0 L-AH0-N D-IH1-T-S F-L-AO1-D