Energy balance is an important key to effectiveness and personal development. Energy is the basis of my work. In fact, I consider that energy is the basis for everything and that everything has an energy field. To read energy and balance energy are among the most fundamental skills of all effective persons, even though they might not use the word “energy” or phrases like “energy balance” or “energy field.”
Happier Living Means Managing Energy Rather than Time
Balance for personal happiness is more about energy than about time, although many people do associate both happiness and efficiency with time. If only you had more time, right?
Many people think that if they only had more hours in the day, they would be more balanced. Or if they had another day in the week, they could finally get everything done. Or if they could spend more time in one way rather than another, they would be more balanced or happy or satisfied or … whatever.
For me, though, the key to happiness is to manage your energy so that you can do all that you want to do — to perform at your best and still feel vibrant. If you feel drained at the end of a client session, a meeting, or a rendezvous with a friend, you need to listen to that information and attend to your energy balance.
As to being tired… The ideal is to be very tired at the end of the day so that you sleep well, awaking refreshed in the morning and eager for a new day to unfold. Being tired or sleepy or just needing a break can also be healthy during the day — if you listen to that information and manage your energy.
Balance is a Dynamic Process
While you may consider in any one moment that balance is evenness or quietness, balance changes according to your needs. I’ve seen people create adventure in their lives in order to balance other parts of their lives that are routine or even boring. Balance is difficult to capture on a still photograph, and is much more appropriate to try to record with a video camera.
The professional dancer seen in mid air can look exceedingly unbalanced, yet when you look at the fluid movements of that dancer in person or on film, you know that balance is dynamic. Life is a constant mix of balance, imbalance, re-balance. This movement is life. Without it, life ceases to exist.
At times, you may yearn for the peace of being on a mountaintop with nothing to do but breathe the clear air and see the magnificent sights. And when that is your yearning, you’re likely overwhelmed or even very distressed at that time. Even though you may yearn for that when under stress, for how long would you want to be so “peaceful”? Soon you would be yearning again for more activity.
And so, the joy of life continues as a dynamic process, the process of energy balance and re-balance.
Balance is Subjective and Individual
What brings balance to your life may equate to havoc in another’s life. One of my dear friends emailed me over the weekend with her travel schedule for the next several months. If it had been my schedule, I would have been wondering how I would get done all the things I love to do in order to be in airports, eating in restaurants, and getting my clothes washed and packed. If I emailed her my list of activities over the same span of time, she would have felt exhausted contemplating how she could possibly get all those things done. And, guess what, we both live joyous lives.
The differences that bring energy balance to each individual life are as varied as the differences that make this such a magnificent and diverse world. To be different is essential.
Balance is Internal, with Outside Indicators
You know you’re balanced by how you feel. Or more precisely, you know by how you feel IF you’re aware of how you feel and understand that your feelings are the best way to know your state of balance. And when you truly do understand this connection, your feelings are more powerful than anything or anyone outside you. You know energy balance from your place of wisdom.
While I consider that balance is an inner mechanism, I also recognize that many outer indicators can be helpful as well. For example, if you are out of touch with your own feelings and don’t recognize your imbalance, it’s very likely that others will tell you, if you can hear them. Some may tell you in direct words, “gee, you seem really out of balance” or with other euphemisms, like “you seem a little confused, are you OK?” Others may not use words, but react to you in ways that are confusing, out of balance, or with resistance that you can’t easily explain.
If one person responds to you in a particularly uncomfortable way, it may not be a reflection of you, but of that one person. However, if multiple people respond similarly, it’s far more helpful to you if you consider that they’re responding to your imbalance. With that knowledge, you can realign your energy — you can feel your energy balance again more easily.
Here’s a quick example: I worked with a patient who received repeated feedback from those around her that she’s impatient and doesn’t listen. Each time she heard the feedback, she found a way to explain or defend her behavior or to criticize the feedback giver. Smart as she is, she won’t likely go any further in her company because she doesn’t manage her own energy well or read the indications of her impact on others. Her listening is at a very superficial level, so she’s able to repeat words, but rarely comprehends the essence of what someone is trying to convey. If she’s able to manage her energy, she’ll be powerful.
Take a moment of reflection and consider answering the following questions for yourself:
- What is energy balance for you?
- How do you know when you’re balanced?
- What do you need to do to bring yourself back to balance when you’re upset or overwhelmed?
- How do you find energy balance on a daily basis? on a weekly basis? on a monthly basis?