By Barbara Pachter, October 20, 2014
You talk too much, You worry me to death, You talk too much, You even worry my pet…
The above lyrics, from the song You Talk Too Much by Joe Jones, sum up a communication distraction that many people have in the workplace – not expressing themselves succinctly.
If you over-talk, you may limit your opportunities for advancement. Other consequences are that people may not want to work for you, or do business with you.
Talking too much is not limited to individuals in any one profession. I have coached IT directors, chief financial officers, sales directors, and marketing managers who needed to learn how to express themselves in fewer words.
But you can’t eliminate what you don’t know you are doing. Pay attention to how you communicate. Do any of the following examples of over-talking apply to you?
1. Giving too much information. During a meeting, a supervisor was asked where he had bought his watch. Instead of saying something like, “At a great local store when I was on vacation in San Francisco,” he went into a five-minute monologue about searching six different stores to find the perfect watch. If people need more detail, they will ask you. One IT director eliminated a lot of the detail in his emails, but added a closing sentence: “If you need additional information, just let me know.” So far, no one has asked!
2. Using too many words. Instead of “Let’s get together next week,” the person might say, “I was just thinking that, you know, if you have some time and are not busy, we ought to get together next week.” Say what you need to say in as few words as necessary.
3. Repeating the same thing over and over. Make your comments, and then shut your mouth! Repeating your points can annoy others.
4. Repeating what someone said in different words. Some repetition can confirm to the other person that you have heard what he or she has said. But in a group meeting, too much repetition can be viewed as one-upmanship – the need to let everyone know that you also knew that information.
5. Offering your opinion when it’s not necessary. This can happen if you don’t read the cues from other meeting participants that no more discussion is needed; or if you insist on offering additional points at the end of a meeting when everyone else is ready to leave.
6. Correcting when it’s not necessary. Do you feel compelled to point out small mistakes in other people’s information? You can come off as a nit-picker when you correct things of little consequence.
Once you realize that you’re an over-talker, you can work to eliminate this habit. Ask a trusted colleague or coach to help.This person can point out when you are talking too much. You can also use your voicemail system. Listen to how you describe something on the messages you leave for others. If you are too wordy, redo the message. Or, come up with a unique solution that works for you. One manager puts the initials KIS at the top of his papers to remind himself to Keep It Short when he speaks at meetings.