Good leaders are effective communicators. To be an effective communicator, a leader has to be an active listener. There are four guidelines for being an active listener when someone is speaking: being empathetic, giving your full attention, refraining from judgment, and positively responding.
1. Be Empathetic
Active listening begins with empathy. A person who is empathetic can see things from another person's point of view instead of solely considering things from their own viewpoint. Empathetic listening helps improve understanding, respect and trust. Listening in an empathetic way helps reduce tension. Empathy can be difficult because of personal issues, struggles and problems. Being empathetic can require a great deal of patience and practice. With empathy, leaders can be more caring and understanding and tense discussions can be deescalated.
2. Give your Full Attention
Focusing on what a speaker is saying is important and it sometimes requires discipline. With technology and other means of distraction, it is easy for listeners to make speakers feel like they are not paying attention to them. Active listening is about remaining focused on the speaker and listeners should refraining from watching the clock and moving around. Devices should be put away so that a speaker knows that they have the listener's full attention. Active listening is about being fully present. It is about paying attention to words and body language. An important part of actively listening is giving the speaker undivided attention and being mindful to what is being said.
3. Refrain from Judgments
Another essential part of active listening is suspending judgment. Speakers who feel judged by counterpoints and disagreements may feel reluctant to finish their points and might feel that their environment is not a safe place to share. When leaders judge, they expose their lack of maturity and their difficulty in welcoming differences of opinions. Great leaders welcome different opinions and ideas. They seek to listen to understand. They also listen without any assumptions about why a speaking is saying certain things or speaking in a certain tone. They treat other people's opinions with compassion and with respect.
4. Respond to Show Understanding
A person can give subtle responses to what a speaker says including through smiling and making eye contact. More direct ways to respond to speakers are through asking questions and verifying understanding. Relevant questions help listeners develop more interest in what the speaker is saying. They help show that the listeners were paying attention. Questions also help listeners learn more about the topic and questions can help build rapport. Another way of responding as an active listener is by clarifying points. Shared understanding is essential to a conversation. Paraphrasing and summarizing a point can help clarify understanding and can help halt miscommunication and conflict.
Leaders who are active listeners will be able to enjoy the benefits of improved relationships, less stress and frustration, more compassion and a broader understanding of others. Being empathetic, paying attention to others, avoiding judgment and being responsive all help make leaders effective and active listeners.