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Emotional Tampon
by AlphaWolf & Co. March 17, 2009
AKA "social tampon" or "social circle tampon"
Quick Definition: A guy (or sometimes a girl) who allows others to bleed their emotional problems all over him.
Full Definition:
An emotional tampon is a term used to describe guys that put up with listening to all the problems that a woman has, in the vain hope of eventually getting into her pants. It is a typical mistake that "nice guys" and AFCs make in their relationships with women.
It can also be used to refer to a specific man who is being used as a distraction for a woman who has recently broken up or will soon break up with her boyfriend. The woman will lead the "tampon" on, and the man will think he has a chance when, in reality, he has no use except to be the "tampon" to help the woman feel better about herself.
Emotional tampons have the mistaken belief that being a good listener means letting other people vent all their problems to them. They believe that being an emotional tampon will get women to like them, and that, by sympathizing with their problems, women will come around to see what a nice guy they are and sleep with them instead.
"This is the only way I can get into a woman's pants…"
However, being an emotional tampon has the opposite effect, because it builds negative rapport with women. Eventually, the woman will come to anchor all of the negative emotions that she is venting with the guy she is venting them to, and actually become repulsed by him. At best, he will be LJBF'd and put into the category of "asexual girlfriend" who she can vent her problems to.
A true PUA knows that it is best to keep conversations focused on positive topics and emotions, especially during the initial stages of attraction. While it is okay to let a woman vent occasionally, a PUA should strive to steer the conversation in a more positive direction by acknowledging the woman's feelings, but then relating to them on a more positive emotion.
PUAs avoid becoming emotional tampons by creating a fun and sexual vibe, rather than being some woman's shoulder to cry on. A positive relationship is built on banter, flirting, and positive emotional connections; not complaints, whining, and the venting of emotional problems.
That guy is just an emotional tampon–you could easily AMOG him!
Related Terms: Orbiter, BBF, LJBF, Wussy, Nice Guy, Negative Rapport
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AlphaWolf & Co.
AlphaWolf is the alter-ego of various PUA Lingo members from 2007 to 2015. We co-wrote and co-authored the majority of terms here for the purpose of sharing our insights as we learned about human social dynamics.
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