When I was younger, I knew that I had a degree of mental illness. However, I was believed by my own self that I didn't deserve it, my levels of anxiety and depression weren't severe enough to get treatment. I always thought that if I went to seek help that the response would be that I am just overreacting, and there was no need to improve my condition cause there are multiple people that have it worse.
It's one of the reasons that I let my mental health take over my life, I never questioned that idea. Even when it was gradually becoming wickeder and critical, the voice in my head said I wasn't sick enough. To the extent, I was where I couldn't go outside of the house without having a panic attack, it wasn't bad enough.
Was it because the way society categorises mental illness as a less urgent health matter, as it is often unable to be physically visible? You have a suspicious mole on your back, you go get it checked out by a doctor. You have a rash for the past week that won't go away, you go get it checked out by a doctor. You feel nervous and sad, can't see anything thing of that, must not be real.
You have a suspicious mole on your back, you go get it checked out by a doctor. You have a rash for the past week that won't go away, you go get it checked out by a doctor. You feel nervous and sad, can't see anything thing of that, must not be real.
If that is how the majority of the public view mental illness, those who seek treatment are automatically discouraged, and feel embarrassed even thinking about talking to a professional. My experience of finding help is over. Yet, there would be countless others who would be in the same situation that I was in. Risking their own mental health to those who belittle us.
If you had an inkling that you had cancer or a tumour, would you put your health on the line and consider yourself not sick enough to see a doctor?
This post is part of a series where I will be reflecting back to my younger self, and how my mental illness developed.
I feel like you took that all out of my brain! That's very similar to my mental health journey as an adult. I look forward to your next post!