Rabbi Nikki DeBlosi (she/her)
Pride is not a rainbow. It's a riot.
Last weekend, our family of four attended Montclair, New Jersey's first ever Pride Festival, the theme of which was: "Be You. Be Heard." Vendors and organizations set up colorful tables, gave out freebies featuring their logos and brands, and handed out a plethora of pride flags emblazoned with the colorful…
I'm a "Woman Rabbi": Bringing Our Full Selves to Jewish Community
Sermon for Shabbat Terumah, February 2022, at Temple Shaaray Tefila in New York City "Excuse me, miss,can you tell me where the rabbi is?" I take a beat before responding. I decide on a chuckle and a quick, "You're looking at her!" "Isn't that skirt a little short for a…
Asking for Too Little: Taylor Swift's All Too Well Better Wake Us All Up to Normalized, Sexist Abuse of Power
Sacred prayer I was there I remember it all too well. Taylor Swift's restored lyrics to her song and short film All Too Well, re-released last week in its form as "Taylor's version," resonate differently with this rabbi. I've spent the week alternating between listening to Swift's full album, Red…
Published in Perceive More!
The Queer Freedom of Passover
Passover is my favorite holiday. It's my favorite because it transmits a message of radical empathy intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, sensually, and gastronomically. We dip the freshness of spring and new growth (often represented by parsley in Ashkenazi seders) in the salty tears of our ancestors (represented by salted water). Charoset…
I'm having an Eeyore day: Parenting with Depression
"Good morning, Eeyore," said Pooh. "Good morning, Pooh Bear," said Eeyore gloomily. "If it is a good morning, which I doubt," said he. "Why, what's the matter?" "Nothing, Pooh Bear, nothing. We can't all, and some of us don't. That's all there is to it." "Can't all what?" said Pooh, rubbing his nose. "Gaiety. Song-and-dance. Here we go round the mulberry bush." I wish my kids called me Eeyore. There's something lovable and romantic about the stuffed donkey with the buttoned-on tail that always seems to go missing. I could imagine myself walking through a pleasant wood as a solitary raincloud tracks my every move, my damp ears drooping to the ground…
They're Gonna Try to Kill Us Again; Let's Be Joyful Anyway
What's this next Jewish holiday about? It's what they're all about: They tried to kill us. We survived. Let's eat. The upcoming holiday of Purim has an even stronger message of resilience, though. In fact, we begin to anticipate it, practicing our capacity for joy in the face of tragedy…
Rest the Little Trees
U.S. capitalist culture prioritizes productivity over presence. This is no more evident than in the ways in which both work and school pressure working parents (especially women and people of color) and children to keep pace during a pandemic. I saw a recent social media post from a parent of…
Inaugural Weeping, Inaugural Joy
It happened the moment those four hundred lamps, representing the 400,000 American lives lost to the COVID-19 virus, illuminated the reflecting pool between the Washington monument and the Lincoln Memorial. I exhaled. I wept. I dropped my shoulders. I closed my eyes. I felt as though I had been received…
Identity in the Window: Visibility and Safety
Our Sages taught: The Hanukkah lamp — it is a commandment to place it at the door of one's house, on the outside. And if one lives in an attic, place it in a window adjoining the public area. (Babylonian Talmud Shabbat 21a) Placing a Hanukkah menorah in the front…
Set Boundaries, Not the Family Table
Queer Wisdom for Pandemic Holidays In the beforetimes, we took the subway everywhere, and one day, weary from walking and playing on the HighLine, my child and I sat on a bench beneath the city, waiting for our train. Suddenly, he reached over to me, crying. …
queer belonging. sex positivity. creative ritual. inclusive judaism.
Joe Duncan