Posted on : October 7, 2006 April 4, 2018 - by gaunilo- 7 Comments.
The other night I was invited to go to someone else's poker night with a friend. Big mistake. Not only was it dull, but they didn't even have the essentials.
In case you don't know what the essentials of Poker Night are…let me educate you. And maybe, in the comments section, you can education me. And together, we can come up with the Ultimate Poker Night Checklist.
Come on. Let's be serious. You aren't really hosting a Poker Night if you don't have beer. No question. This one is absolute. The other thing. Don't cheap-out on the beer either. It should be good beer…no skunk.
If you're hosting Poker Night, get the wife to make some homemade guacemole. Buy some nacho chips…and you're golden. If you can't get the wife to do anything around the house, then you're going to have to make the guacemole yourself. None of that store-bought stuff.
Half way through the night, everyone should step outside onto the porch and light-up a few cigars together. The bonding couldn't get any better than sharing a high-priced, quality cigar with your friends.
Nothing ruins Poker Night like having a woman (or the kids) around. It kills the ambience. Tell them to take one for the team and go to Target. Guys need to talk guy-talk. We need to get rowdy and when women (or kids) are around, we just can't let loose and Poker Night becomes Dullsville.
Poker needs to be front and center. The only possible reason for having the TV on would be a football game, and you just shouldn't play poker during a football game. So kill the TV and if you've gotta play the stereo, keep it down so that Poker stays priority #1.
I just wanted to mention that this post is sorta tongue and cheek. No offense to women intended!
"No offense to women…" ??? HAH!
Why not add 'Make the wife clean up beforehand… and afterwards, while you're at it." Why not add 'Make sure the naked dancing girls dance during the cigars, so as not to detract from the poker playing." Etc., etc.
Let some of that creativity work to her benefit… and therefore to yours!! She may even make homemade chips to go with that guacamole!
Ok. So I ran this post by my wife before making it public. Just like I read to her Meno's definition of virtue for women. It made her mad.
For some reason I really like this game…teasing well educated, enlightened women by making macho/chauvinistic statements.
This is exactly the kind of "poker night" my friends want to have and that I hate. This ain't a poker night, it's a night with your friends in which poker is NOT front and center.
William Safire (9/3/06) writes about a great term for people who will always take the bait … "moonbats." "Certain issues seem to trigger a reflexive response from some people much like wolves howl at the moon." Used often these days for liberals.