Or– A fine mix to fix writers block. Or-An unlikely combination of inspiration.
A post a week? I can't make that, it usually takes me a month to write one! It takes even longer to read one!
Stuck for inspiration. Stuck for any kind of thoughts what so ever. Blank screen syndrome. The more I stare at the screen the blanker, whiter and emptier it seems to become. Numbness sets in. A mild tick develops in my caffeine induced left eye (the right eye is strictly a spirits-only sort of chap). Fingers tips become heavy, laden with self-crafted doubt and obstinate lethargy… 'This is impossible, I'm not smart enough', 'there's not enough time', e.t.c.
I'm not even motivated enough to get distracted by social media and such like. Or play a time wasting game-app. Or fiddle with a time-saving app. Or try and make sense of a time keeping app.
Nothing else for it, I shall have to go on a wander to clear the rafter and eves. However, I can't seem to drag my hooves out from under my posterior.
Meanwhile the keyboard is closing in as the right eye shuts of its own accord. Down, down, down into darkness. It feels kind of secure here. I don't need to be anybody or anything. As far as I'm concerned, the day is finished and in epic failure. A redundant writing day wasted…and it is not even elevenses yet.
Well alright! All of a once I am motivated and energized. Small folk have a very calming and reassuring influence on me. They don't care when I look or feel glum. They don't even care when I have a keyboard imprinted on my forehead. They only care that I come out to play and chase bears with them.
So off to one of my favourite woods for an adventure. I brought along a keg of coffee and a foraging book. The kiddling equipped us all with sturdy bear-poking sticks. The Artificer brought his welly boots and his Lucky Cap of Tinkering.
There was many a mud lake to cross, but brave Kobi took point and led us all safely through. There were also many snare and pit traps to avoid, possibly set by goblin hunters. However, our Artificer new well their tricks and disarmed them all without issue.
We hunted for huge grizzly bears and we tracked ferocious wolves. Didder the Artificer and I were most concerned about our possible encounter with an omnivorous leviathan, despite our robust bear poking sticks. Kobi however, was unperturbed and gleefully charged into the undergrowth unfazed. He truly is a great hero and leader of men.
There was even a goblin camp or two to be explored; as it was day time all inhabitants scattered as we approached then they kept to the shadows out of sight. Although they had little in the way of plunder it was still an interesting intrusion. Kobi even came into possession of a Goblins' Luck-Stone!
Later on we spotted a couple of wayward hares and there was even a tiger flying an aeroplane overhead!
We were subject to a curiously brief hail storm, much to the giggling delight of young Kobi the Barbarian and the party had to take refuge in one of my halfway-shelters until it passed us over. Clearly this was some sort of fell sorcery at work by an evil witch nearby. But not to fear, as everybody well knows witches are terrified of the ferocious battle cry of a small boy whirling a stick around his head. So then all was bright and sunny again so we continued on.
We had to skim round the Wishing Well of Eternal Jubilation and Scummy Bits as there was a ghastly troll slumbering nearby, snoring his head off (I believe it must be Conrad the Destroyer of Worlds' week off otherwise he would have moved the beast along by now).
Sleepily we made our way back to the Didder-Mobile and, after a parting shot or two at the skulking goblins, we set off back home again for tea, biscuits and a big old hunk of cheese (curtesy of the Artificer and his wife).
Now then, this adventure has moved me to post up a sneak preview of an on-going project, a tale regarding the above little chap who rested me from my gloom and withering writers block. So here's a peek at something I started around about Christmas time-ish. Just about all the pictures are complete, I just need to find a savvy and cunning way to ink and colour them. But more to come. So here you have in all its glory, your first glimpse at a story concerning young Kobrias and his Landover: Bumbles sore Bumper!
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