Recently I wrote about an upcoming writing workshop I am to attend, focused on the theme "The Story You Have to Tell." I confessed that I'm still searching for the tale worthy of telling.
Readers kindly gave encouragement, suggesting clues were close at hand. I wasn't getting much inspiration, just thoughts of the roses at Paramahansa Yogananda's Lake Shrine in California.
Searching, seeking, questing, looking…I finally surrendered and took a morning walk. And it was there, between my footsteps, that a patchwork of stories revealed themselves in random order. The common thread being the very essence of my circumstance: my seeking.
It became clear that my pivotal life experiences have all been rooted in a quest to connect with the Divine. There have been moments when I have been brushed by Grace. Others, when I have fallen into a deep abyss of nothingness. Sometimes I am quite conscious of my search. At other times, I am absorbed in all things earthly, barely remembering that there is anything more than clock-time.
The very premise of this blog stems from my desire to find the profound within the mundane. I sense that the key is in the simplest of moments, always contained right now, if only I can pause to perceive it. Yet, so often there is some veil hindering my full awareness.
My first memory of feeling connection to something beyond myself, was at the age of six. I was tucked deep within the rows of an orange grove, on the front porch of my house. Just me and a cattle dog.
Realizing that I may have written about this experience already, I checked the Archives and found a poem posted in May 2011. I'm re-posting it here, as the first in the Seeking series.
Recently, the media has highlighted scientific findings that suggest a release of the bonding chemical, oxytocin, when humans and dogs gaze into each other's eyes. I'm not well-versed on all of the research, but I remember my own love-bliss, human-dog experience. The dog and I were both fresh to the planet, and sweetly unaware of concepts, definitions, or chemicals.