Had a conversation with my wife last week, indirectly about the fog that comes with life. The conversation was my wife talking and me listening. I learned a lot about her and I learned a lot about myself.
So what about this fog?
In that conversation with my wife, she expressed her unhappiness with the current state of things. Normal. It wasn't about our marriage, but the fog of life. The Circumstances that press against us. Since I've got a good pulse of who's out there, I know you feel me. We concluded once again that life is tough work. Regardless of what you hear from _______, life is tough work.
When she finished and we moved on, I asked myself why I'm often not fazed by the fog thing. All of sudden a rush of memories came over me. I started 40 years backward. Each one checking a box. I came away not just knowing, but understanding.
It is abundantly clear that I have had a life checkered with fog (tragedies, struggles, crossroads, etc.). I'm sure, upon reflection, you might say the same. The point is not about which is better. Even though, in America, many have duped into believing that the best life is the one absent of problems. We act in a manner that says this is true. One thing is clear for me. A good part of my life has been shaped by my fog. I seriously doubt that I would be doing what I do, if it wasn't for those crucibles. I am thankful.
My understanding today is we need to see fog as clear. Real life is found here.
No one really knows what's around the corner-in any respect. It frustrates us, confounds us and can generally paralyze us if we're not careful. It's a battle and riddle we all do a dance with.
My core answer has been found in my relationship with God. Seems fitting since he knows what's around the corner. Don't get me wrong, this isn't always a pretty picture. I still have things in my life that I question why he didn't warn about what was awaiting me. Over time life has met up with a lesson that when first experienced seemed straight from hell. Funny how that can work. He knows that even the crushing blow can produce something beautiful.
But what about the stuff we mostly control? Our career choices, our health choices, our relationship choices. A wise man once told me that 90% of my life would be determined by the choices I'd make. That's staggering when you think about it.
So maybe we need to focus on making good choices. Maybe that has some impact on what's around the corner.
I can't remember exactly how many times Thomas Edison failed as he tried to bring his light bulb idea to life. Was it a hundred failed experiments? Maybe it was a thousand. Regardless, he failed multiple times.
This post really isn't about overcoming failure, though that could be helpful. I really want to explore the mindset of having a willingness to stumble, a willingness to be the fool, the willingness to launch something most in the herd don't see nor understand.
I think we're way to willing to accept dime-store imitations (you fill in the blank here) when it comes to creative and inspiring leaders. And by the way, creative and inspiring leaders are the types of leaders with substance and reality backing them up. I'm not referring to a leader of a three-ring-circus or some executive who pulls out talking points from 5 years ago.
I'm not sure we recognize authentic when we see it.
Preserving your rep. at the expense of something given to you by heaven is foolish. Your mortgage, 401K, bonuses or a nice fat promotion won't be there for you in the long run. Those are temporary states that can change in a moment. We know this to be true, whether we're willing to admit it or not.
Could it be that Edison was not so special? What if everyone was supposed to pursue an end, even if it meant repeated failure? What separated Edison from his herd was his willingness to take the step of twisting fate even if he didn't know where it would ultimately lead. I define twisting fate as someone who acts on faith, realizing that the final product/outcome will resemble a mosaic more than a picture-perfect portrait.
This is hard work that many turn away from.