In 1966, Dan Goleman in his book called Emotional Intelligence popularized the term, ‘Emotional Intelligence (EI) which was coined by two researchers-Peter Salavoy and John Mayer. Emotional Intelligence (EI) means “the abilities to recognize and regulate emotions in ourselves and others”. In other words, it means being aware of our emotions and that of the others. The skill to manage and regulate these emotions in a manner that they are beneficial to us in all the circumstances constitutes our EI.
Goleman in his research pitched a direct relationship between EI’s of the company staff and the company’s success:
- High level of EI in Employees makes them self-aware which in turn helps them in understanding their co-workers and to meet deadlines.
- People with high EI aren’t worried about client criticism; they are more concerned about the outcomes instead of being offended.
- For a job position, if two candidates have similar IQs that the one with higher EI is ought to be selected.
People with Higher EI:
- They lead a happy life enriched with good physical and mental health because of their emotionally mature, competent and skilled personality.
- People with higher EI, have a more comfortable, safe and successful life. They generally are more productive and not afraid of changes.
- Weaknesses don’t hold them back as they know their potential and capabilities and their areas that need improvement.
- The basis of EI lies at being empathetic; being able to understand the emotions of the clients and co-workers which puts them in a better place where they can move past the difficult situations without much drama.
- People with high EIs are effective controllers. They are able to control the negative feeling which can later result in destructive consequences.
- Emotionally intelligent and optimistic individuals work hard towards solutions; they put in all their attention and focus on attaining the goal while ignoring all the negativity around.
- Curiosity and wonder are the two terms that keep them going. They are non-judgemental, open-minded and the ones who look out for new opportunities.
- They are thankful and gracious for their lives and they don’t let anyone de-motivate them.
People Who Lack EI:
- People who lack emotional intelligence may become a slave to their emotions and end up losing everything instead of gaining anything.
- People who are unable to understand the emotions of the others can be perceived as ‘stone-hearted’, which might lead to eventual hatred or issues in interpersonal relationships.
- A sociopath who lacks EI would be unable to put his/her point across, which will make him/her experience anxiety and frustration.
- People who are unable to fathom their emotions may be unable to plan ahead accordingly. Such a lack of planning may lead to depression amongst them.
Strategies for building your emotional intelligence:
- Being Self-Aware: It is essential to understand one’s emotions and the reason behind them. One needs to understand that there are no good or bad feelings. Exploring them is a better option than a judgment. Be immersed in your emotions in a way that you can use them to your advantage, avoiding the emotions is of no help. Mood swings and emotional upheavals are way too common. Don’t be misguided by them and don’t make any important decisions during such upheavals.
- Managing Self Control: Emotions are diverse and self-control is important to manage them and keep them in a check. Whenever you find yourself in a turbulent situation, don’t react, count up to ten, calm yourself down and then face the situation. A smile or a laugh is what you need to brighten your day up and keep those negative emotions aside. Think before you act, don’t make any decisions in haste, make time-think, analyze and then decide.
- Being Socially Aware: By being open to the emotions of the others an individual seeks to learn and understand far greater things in life. Understand that other person have the same value as you do and it is important to make them feel valued. Be observant to people and their emotions. Although, planning and decision making are very important but it is far more important to ‘live in the moment’ as the task in hand is as important as anything else. Put yourself in the shoes of the others and try seeing the situation from their perspective.
- Managing The Relationships: Relationship management is the most important part of EI management as it requires the understanding of not just one’s emotions and needs but that of the other as well. Acknowledge the fact that the others have feelings as well. Show that you care. Improve communications, as they are the relationship builders. Little gestures, such a smile, thank you or sorry, matter. Don’t hesitate in complimenting a person.
Human beings and emotions go hand in hand. For a better future and success, it is important to understand these volatile emotions and manage them effectively. Unattended emotions are the main reason for a person’s downfall. Hence, in this ever changing economy, Emotional Intelligence is required for one’s survival.