Each child is a special individual and will have some endearing traits and those which are not so welcome. Therefore, some children are easy to raise while others give the word ‘parenting’ a whole new meaning! Strong-willed kids fall into this same group and at the end of your day will leave you tired. Yet raising a child with a strong will is not a negative thing; in general, it is considered a good trait. Scroll down to know how to handle a strong-willed child.
What is a Strong-Willed Child?
Kids with a strong will are often characterized as ‘difficult’ or ‘stubborn.’ They are really kids who like to have some form of control over their lives. They don’t think twice about breaking or violating the rules and prefer to revolt if you’re trying to control their acts. They will get upset because things don’t go the way they expect.
Attributes of a Strong-Willed Child
There are certain characteristics that strong-willed kids display, and you are likely to be aware of what they are, as only parents really know their kids well.
Giving orders comes to them naturally and they expect to be obeyed. They have in mind a clear vision of how things will be and will do whatever they can to enforce it. They won’t hesitate to tell you what they need you to do to make their perspective come true.
They want to do it all fast and do it all at once. Impatience is their middle name and they struggle to wait for things to happen around them. Eating, talking, walking … this has to happen quickly.
3. Throw Tantrums
Young children are prone to temper tantrums, particularly toddlers. But when it comes to children who are strong-willed they feel the extreme rage that takes a lot of time to calm down. They could find it hard to express their wrath.
4. Sense of Right and Wrong
These kids will only do what they believe in, and will therefore not hesitate to fight for what they think is right. If they have made their minds, no amount of persuasion will budge them.
5. Argue Endlessly
They’ll continue to pursue a subject until it’s resolved to their satisfaction. Just answering “I say so,” they’re not going to be accepted and they’re going to question you until they tire you. They love being in fights for power.
6. Learn Things By Themselves
They prefer learning by the process of trial and error, rather than following instructions. They like being given the option of doing something, rather than being told.
How To Handle Strong-Willed Child?
There is no formula to follow while raising boys and girls with a strong-willed. You’ll need to change your strategy according to your child’s actions and attitude. Here are some things to keep in mind as you do this:
1. Give Your Child Choices
Orders with a strong-willed child aren’t going down well. So give your child a choice of options instead so that they feel like they’re in charge. Ask your child, for instance, if he or she wants to go home from the park right now or in ten minutes with no fuss.
2. Give Them Some Authority
Strong-willed kids like to feel in control, so keep reminding them to recall missing chores before they complete it by themselves, instead of nagging them to get chores finished.
3. Postpone Disciplinary Action
Disciplining only serves its function when the child grasps the meaning behind it. So wait for them to calm down before the penalty is imposed and the consequences outlined.
4. Know That They Are Learners With Experience
Spirited kids must learn from experience. Lets your child benefit by playing and making mistakes so long as there is no danger of serious injury.
5. Change Your Behavior
Typically a child with a strong will is not trying to provoke you on purpose. This is just the way it is. So, each time you communicate with your kids, try to remember that.
6. Define the Limits
The child will be stifled by too many regulations and you all exhausted in trying to enforce them. It can lead your child to just neglect them all. Around the same time, it is necessary to make your child aware that you are the boss around the home. Establish behavioral standards and ensure that they extend to adults as well, and are adhered to by all.
7. Emphasize Positive Traits
Be sure you have motivating words for good behavior, and affirm positive acts like when the child works efficiently together. Your child’s going to have its abilities, so start channelizing those the right way. One approach is to look as persistent and assertive, to be stubborn and challenging.
Ways to Discipline Your Child
Disciplining doesn’t involve using physical coercion to get your kid to see things in your way. It is unlikely that an energetic child would listen to clear orders or commands, and you may need to find alternative ways to get them to obey laws.
1. Check Your Tone
Yelling and screaming can make matters worse and being sarcastic or sharp may cause your child to turn to battle mode. So, take a deep breath and speak with a still steady and calm voice, and bring your point across.
2. Stick to Routines
Make sure that you stick to a sleep schedule, which allows them enough rest every night, as a child’s lack of sleep will make it cranky and lead to frequent discord.
When you threaten your child with such consequences such as loss of rights, make sure that you stick to what you have said. Wavering in your decision to test the boundaries will further embolden your child.
4. Open Communications Channels
Penalties do not serve any purpose when dealing with a child with a strong will. Talk to your child and see what’s bothering them, and send them signs about how to convey their feelings, whether it’s fear, rage, or hurt.
Positive Side of Strong-Willed Children
A strong-willed child will transform into an independent adult who stands strongly by their beliefs. These kids turn out to be good people because they don’t give up on something just because many challenges are present. Strong-willed children enjoy taking on tasks with alacrity, and this propensity continues with them into adulthood. They have all the requisite qualities in a leader and are likely to make a difference in the world in some way.
Parenting a child with a strong will could seem a daunting job, especially in the early years. However, you will help them transform into a strong, self-confident adult you can be proud of by cultivating your child’s individualistic personality in the right way. By shifting your focus to the positive characteristics of your kids, you’ll be able to channel their energy in the right way.
Also Read: How To Deal With Child’s Stealing Habit?