In the previous postings we covered Tip 1: Really Listen, Tip 2: Pay Attention, and Tip 3: Leave your Assumptions at Home. Today we are going to discuss Cross-Cultural Intelligence Tip 4: Judgments are not Allowed.
In our day-to-day life we often pass judgments on other people without even noticing that we do. We judge and we compare ourselves to others. We compare achievements; we compare appearance; we compare education and intellect; we even compare social behavior and social acceptance. Remember Susan Boyle? Remember how everyone judged her by what she looked like, by what romantic experience she had (or didn’t have), and by the dream she dared to have (in her age and with her looks!).
It’s similar with cultures. We judge each new culture and its people from the point of view of how it is in comparison to our own. However, each comparison is ultimately an illusion – an illusion that creates either a superiority or inferiority complex. Both these complexes contribute to misunderstandings between people; prevent them from truly knowing each other, and make it this much harder to build bridges and friendships. If you judge someone to be better than you, how easy is it going to be for you to establish the connection? Or, if you judge that person to be worse than you, would you even want to make a connection? The process of judging not only makes you feel bad sometimes, but it also often robs you from an experience that can change your life. It stops you from enjoying new things from an “uncluttered” — from judgments — perspective.
So stay judgment-free. Consider everyone and everything as it comes into your life – new, exciting, and full of possibilities to explore.
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