We all communicate daily – we nod, talk, interrupt, advise, criticize, judge, argue and do many more things which reinforce that we communicate daily. But, are we communicating effectively and productively? This is an important concept because effective communication is an important step towards success. Good and effective communication is that where we don’t interrupt unnecessarily, don’t give unsolicited advice, we don’t argue, judge and criticize just for the sake of doing it.
Effective communication is all about being on the same page. It often happens that the speaker says something with a thought and the listener hears and understands something different altogether. Good communication is more than having a conversation that involves comprehending the real emotions and intentions behind the conversation. To develop effective communication skills you have to develop some of these skills.
Listening is the foundation for an effective communication. The first thing that we don’t like in others is when they don’t pay attention to what we are saying. We feel insulted, get annoyed and angry in such encounters. So, the first thing for a good communication is listening properly. Listening to what the other person is saying with full attention gives you the advantage of understanding the thoughts and intentions behind the verbal and non-verbal communication. This gives you clarity on thoughts and lets you get ready with your words and actions.
Developing appropriate body language skills that are a part of non-verbal communication is very crucial to becoming an effective communicator. You should make sure that your actions are in line with your words and they are not contradicting what you are verbally saying. If there is no sync between your verbal and non-verbal communication you tend to give the wrong signal to the other party. The listener will not be able to believe and trust your communication.
Focusing on what you are speaking and to whom you are speaking is very critical to make the other party trust you and be engaged in the conversation. By playing with things like pens, phones etc. you signal that you are not concentrating on the conversation and thus not interested in the person to whom you are speaking. Don’t engage in things that are distracting and change the mood of the conversation.
Managing stress at the moment of speaking when you are irritated or annoyed with the other person is very much required to avoid misunderstandings, confusions, and conflicts. Learn to stay calm and not getting overwhelmed with emotions so as to speak with clear thoughts.
Being assertive is also as much necessary as being calm. Being calm and controlling emotions doesn’t mean that you have to agree with whatever the other person is saying without saying a ‘no’. To maintain your self-esteem and to be honest with yourself, you should learn to be assertive without being aggressive. Effective communication is always about the exchange of clear thoughts from both sides. Being assertive helps to communicate your thoughts firmly and honestly which is very much required in every communication.
Good and effective communication is a prerequisite in every walk of life whether it is personal or business related. To maintain great relationships with your family and friends, to achieve success in your profession or business, one thing that plays a major role is effective communication. If you want to start developing your communication skills, start with listening properly. Good listening leads to good communication.