  Godwin's law, i.e. the empirical observation that as an online discussion
grows in time, the probability of a comparison with Nazis or Hitler quickly
approaches unity, is one of the best-documented facts of the internet.
Anticipating the quantum internet, here we show under reasonable model
assumptions a polynomial quantum speedup of Godwin's law. Concretely, in
quantum discussions, Hitler will be mentioned on average quadratically earlier,
and we conjecture that under specific network topologies, even cubic speedups
are possible. We also show that the speedup cannot be more than exponential,
unless the polynomial hierarchy collapses to a certain finite level. We report
on numerical experiments to simulate the appearance of the quantum Godwin law
in future quantum internets; the most amazing finding of our studies is that --
unlike quantum computational speedups -- the quantum Godwin effect is not only
robust against noise, but actually enhanced by decoherence. We have as yet no
theoretical explanation, nor a good application, for this astonishing
behaviour, which we dub quantum hyperpiesia.
