  The statistical physics of phase transitions has been hugely successful at
describing numerous natural, physical, and technological phenomena, and now a
rigorous examination of the phase space of the culinary regime is likewise ripe
for the picking. Despite great demand for the resolution of many scientific
debates over the taxonomy of food, past attempts have failed to account for
complex phase behavior and co-existence, and have thus left the public hungry
for a more substantial theory. By applying the principles of statistical
physics and thermodynamics, we here map out the complete phase space of all
culinary dishes and find three distinct phase regimes: Soup, Salad, and
Sandwich. We consider the effect of different state variables on these phase
boundaries, as well as regions of co-existence and triple points. With this
complete 3-dimensional phase diagram of all foods, we can conclusively answer
many bitter debates, including the imperishable question "is a hotdog a
sandwich?" The answer: yes.
