  It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single human in possession of
a good space telescope, must be in search of a space vampire. Here, we showcase
our search for transit signatures of tidally locked space vampires, trapped in
the gravitational pull of late M-dwarfs. We generate forward models
representing two potential space vampire populations - those in bat shape and
those in humanoid shape. We search lightcurves from the Transiting Exo-Vampire
Survey Satellite (TEvSS) using a template matching algorithm and fit them using
our allesfitter software. Adding the information gained from TEvSS data, we
greatly decrease the uncertainty for the existence and occurrence rates of
space vampires, and constrain eta(space vampire) to a range of 0% to 100% (or
more). These precise analyses will be crucial for optimizing future observing
schedules for space-vampire characterization with the James Webb Space-Vampire
Telescope (JWSvT) and the Extremely-Large-Vampire Telescopes (ELvTs).
