  The search for exoplanets has become a focal point of astronomical research,
captivating public attention and driving scientific inquiry; however, the rush
to confirm exoplanet discoveries has often overlooked potential alternative
explanations leading to a scientific consensus that is overly reliant on
untested assumptions and limited data. We argue that the evidence in support of
exoplanet observation is not necessarily definitive and that alternative
interpretations are not only possible, but necessary. Our conclusion is
therefore concise: exoplanets do not exist. Here, we present the framework for
a novel type of cuboid star, or squar, which can precisely reproduce the full
range of observed phenomena in stellar light curves, including the trapezoidal
flux deviations (TFDs) often attributed to "exoplanets." In this discovery
paper, we illustrate the power of the squellar model, showing that the light
curve of the well-studied "exoplanet" WASP-12b can be reconstructed simply from
a rotating squar with proportions $1:1/8:1$, without invoking ad-hoc planetary
bodies. Our findings cast serious doubt on the validity of current
"exoplanetary" efforts, which have largely ignored the potential role of squars
and have instead blindly accepted the exoplanet hypothesis without sufficient
critical scrutiny. In addition, we discuss the sociopolitical role of climate
change in spurring the current exoplanet fervor which has lead to the
speculative state of "exoplanetary science" today. We strongly urge the
astronomical community to take our model proposal seriously and treat its
severe ramifications with the utmost urgency to restore rationality to the
field of astronomy.
