  We define `third derivative' General Relativity, by promoting the integration
measure in Einstein-Hilbert action to be an arbitrary $4$-form field strength.
We project out its local fluctuations by coupling it to another $4$-form field
strength. This ensures that the gravitational sector contains only the usual
massless helicity-2 propagating modes. Adding the charges to these $4$-forms
allows for discrete variations of the coupling parameters of conventional
General Relativity: $G_N, \Lambda, H_0$, and even $\langle {\tt Higgs }\rangle$
are all variables which can change by jumps. Hence de Sitter is unstable to
membrane nucleation. Using this instability we explain how the cosmological
constant problem can be solved. The scenario utilizes the idea behind the
irrational axion, but instead of an axion it requires one more $4$-form field
strength and corresponding charged membranes. When the membrane charges satisfy
the constraint $\frac{2\kappa_{\tt eff}^2 \kappa^2 |{\cal Q}_i|}{3{\cal T}^2_i}
< 1$, the theory which ensues exponentially favors a huge hierarchy
$\Lambda/\mpl^4 \ll 1$ instead of $\Lambda/\mpl^4 \simeq 1$. The discharges
produce the distribution of the values of $\Lambda$ described by the saddle
point approximation of the Euclidean path integral.
