  The evidence for a new singlet scalar particle from the 750 GeV diphoton
excess, and the absence of any other signal of new physics at the LHC so far,
suggest the existence of new coloured scalars. To study this possibility, we
propose a supersymmetry inspired simplified model, extending the Standard Model
with a singlet scalar and with heavy scalar fields carrying both colour and
electric charges -- the `squarks'. To allow the latter to decay, and to
generate the dark matter of the Universe, we also add a neutral fermion to the
particle content. We show that this model provides a two-parameter fit to the
observed diphoton excess consistently with cosmology, while the allowed
parameter space is bounded by the consistency of the model. In the context of
our simplified model this implies the existence of other supersymmetric
particles accessible at the LHC, rendering this scenario falsifiable. If this
excess persists, it will imply a paradigm shift in assessing supersymmetry
breaking and the role of scalars in low scale physics.
