  Introducing a new and universally applicable discretizing technique, I
construct a class of local and unitary lattice theories of Weyl neutrinos; this
solves a longstanding and allegedly unsolvable problem in quantum field theory.
En route, I also prove a general ``go'' theorem that all Lagrangian-density
based continuum quantum field theories can be lattice-regularized.
  (INFORMAL ABSTRACT: You didn't study the Nielsen-Ninomiya theorem, only
trusted the authors to have proven ``the absence of neutrinos on a lattice''.
Well, they didn't. Nor can anyone else: every continuum theory can be
lattice-regularized. A proof of that, plus an explicit construction of lattice
neutrinos: if you read only one paper this year, here it is! From now on, this
is how chiral fermions should be latticized. All else is gaslight.)
