  We present a framework for embedding scalar-tensor models of screened modifed
gravity such as chameleons, symmetrons and environmental dilatons into global
supersymmetry. This achieved by secluding the dark sector from both the
observable and supersymmetry breaking sectors. We examine the resulting
supersymmetric features in a model-independent manner and find that, when the
theory follows from an underlying supergravity, the mediation of supersymmetry
breaking to the dark sector induces a soft mass for the scalar of order the
gravitino mass. This is enough to forbid the construction of supersymmetric
symmetrons and ensures that when other screening mechanisms operate, no object
in the universe is unscreened thereby precluding any observable signatures. In
view of a possible origin of modifed gravity within fundamental physics, we
find that no-scale models are the only ones that can circumvent these features.
We also present a novel mechanism where the coupling of the scalar to two other
scalars charged under U(1) can dynamically generate a small cosmological
constant at late times in the form of a Fayet-Iliopoulos term.
