  Scattering amplitudes for the simplest theory of colored scalar particles -
the Tr($\Phi^3$) theory - have recently been the subject of active
investigations. In this letter we describe an unanticipated wider implication
of this work: the Tr($\Phi^3$) theory secretly contains Non-linear Sigma Model
(NLSM) amplitudes to all loop orders. The NLSM amplitudes are obtained from
Tr$(\Phi^3)$ amplitudes by a unique shift of kinematic variables. We show that
this shifted kinematics produces amplitudes for a cubic theory with a linear
term in potential, with extrema spontaneously breaking $U(N) \to U(N-k) \times
U(k)$. The Goldstone amplitudes for this theory coincide with those of pions in
the $U(N) \times U(N) \to U(N)$ chiral Lagrangian to all orders in the planar
limit. We also give a purely on-shell understanding of this correspondence,
showing integrands defined by the kinematic shifts have the correct residues on
poles and appropriately produce the Adler zero. Finally, we discuss how similar
kinematic shifts produce certain infinite classes of mixed amplitudes of pions
and Tr($\Phi^3$) scalars, most of which are not interpretable from the
Lagrangian description.
