So, lately I’ve been thinking a lot about pirates, and if I were a pirate whether I’d prefer to have an eye patch or a peg-leg. At first I thought that I’d probably like to have an eye patch because I just like the way they look, but then I though what if somebody is charging at me from my left side and I can’t see that well out of my left side because that’s the eye that has a patch over it. And because I can’t see them I get stabbed or something. Then I thought maybe I’d change my option from eye patch to peg leg. But then I though what if that same guy who stabbed me because I had an eye patch was chasing me, and I couldn’t run as fast as him because one of my legs was a chunk of wood? He’d probably catch up with me and kill me either way. So, in conclusion I think that if I had to pick any pirate thing to have I’d pick a parrot on my shoulder. No worry of being killed with a parrot on your shoulder. If anything he could warn you of impending doom through some sort of code I’d teach him.

Being able to talk to animals would be sweet. Can you imagine how much being able to talk to a bear would help you out if you were ever being attacked by one? You could just say, “Hey, Bear. What’s the deal?” and he’d think, “whoa! This guy’s speakin’ my language.” Then you could explain to him that you have no reason to be attacked this way and that if the two of you could just sit and talk about things, he’d probably see how wrong he was to ever attack you in the first place. You’d never have to worry about being attacked by any sort of animal again. Except maybe a shark. A shark couldn’t hear you ‘cause you’d be under water and if you tried to talk to him you’d drown.

If I had the choice to have any super power, it would definitely be the ability to breathe under water. Most people pick flying for their number one super power but I figure, what’s so great about flying? So you get to get from one place to the other really fast, big deal. I can do that in my truck. Breathing under water enables you to explore the deepest, darkest parts of the world, and possibly even talk to sharks.

Well, I have to go hang out at Corner Gas now. Catch ya later.