Layne Staley (No Moz Content)



Another great email from my bro for any Alice in Chains fans



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From : "jontando"

To : "Buncha People"

Subject : Layne Staley

Date : Tue, 30 Apr 2002 23:15:22 -0700

I din't write this, but I should have tried to.

For the rumor-mongers, labellers, and finger pointers:

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Some people have to step on others to feel good about

themselves. Others

think money is the answer to all things. Layne would be laughing

that anyone

is even talking about him and glad that those full of anger have

a place to

spew it out. Maybe if they shit it all out of their system they

will have

only good left in them, one can only hope.



Labeling Layne a junkie is as ridiculous as calling someone Big

Nose Joe or

Straight Haired Mary, and those of you who have to do it look in

the mirror

and tell me you don't see faults. Layne wasn't a Rockstar, he

was a human

being with the same human feelings we all have about ourselves.

He also had

the same insecurities. People who don't know you saying they

love you

doesn't change how you perceive yourself, because the bottom

line is you

know the truth. Those talking about him don't even know him.



Layne had a disease he tried desperately to rid himself of and

wished he

didn't have. Would you be so cruel to someone who had cancer?

You don't just

walk away from an addiction. If it's so easy, I challenge anyone

to give up

something as simple as sugar/high fructose corn syrup. I bet

they couldn't

even for one week; it's in everything: bread, mayonnaise, fruit

juice etc.

Until you've walked in those shoes........



As far as having the resources to get off it, there are far more

sick f***s

out there that wanted to get close to him by mailing him drugs,

and putting

them in his pocket when he'd go out, or stalking him than

friends and

family. Let me tell you he had a ton of those. To protect him

from those

people meant a lifestyle where your full time job was to

baby-sit the

situation. Who can pay their bills and live a normal life

protecting someone

else 24/7?



Layne was a beautiful sensitive man that would do anything for

anyone. He

loved everyone and truly appreciated that people dug him, dug

the band and

dug the music. The world is an uglier place without his

kindness,his warmth,

his great sense of humor, and his fun. Layne never accepted the

title of

Rockstar. He was just easygoing, approachable Layne. He thought

it was weird

people would want his autograph and people were down right rude

trying to

get it. While he was out to dinner or even going to the

bathroom. Being

successful doesn't allow people to have the right to do that.

What happened

to common courtesy? Yet he would oblige, smile and be friendly.



Layne didn't think of himself as a great artist. He was just a

man that

loved art, and I can say one of the most artistic people ever.

He could do

anything that involved creating art and do it extraordinarily

well.



I remember him talking to Kurt once about "how do you react to

the person

acting like your best friend that used to make your life pure

hell when you

were in school, then were too nice to tell them to f*** off?"

Instead they'd

be nice and let it eat them up inside.



Layne lost the love of his life 6 years ago; people would

actually show up

at the hospital with heroin for her in hopes of seeing him. Fans

even showed

up to her funeral! She too couldn't get away from the harassing

dealers and

on many occasions would have to hide in their house because

dealers or fans

with drugs would sit out front and stalk the place relentlessly.

Not for 20

minutes, not for an hour, we're talking: camping out, sleeping

in their

cars, sitting on the porch, and banging on the windows. Tell me

how you quit

an addiction when it's put in your face everywhere you turn?

Think of all

the freedoms you have, like going to the grocery store, going to

get gas,

going anywhere, which he didn't have.



You know how many people pretended to want to help him and ended

up stealing

from him? Not just things like money, his credit cards, music

equipment,

etc. but personal stuff he couldn't replace? Like pictures of

him and Demri,

or him and his friends, or him and his family. Those were

commodities to

people, to him they were valued treasures. Layne was never a

person to those

people, he was just a badge where people with low self-esteem

could brag

they knew him. In his altered sense and with his kind heart he

would never

get it until it was too late. When he did, he never did anything

harsh, like

press-charges. Those people robbed him of his girlfriend, robbed

him of his

family, and robbed him of his friends. Who out there would like

to go

through life wondering if everyone in your life has ulterior

motives and

never really knowing? The disappointment of how you'd feel when

you

discovered, one after another after another, had listened to

your innermost

personal thoughts, pretended to be a friend and wasn't.



He couldn't go back to music because heroin ravished his body

and it made

him feel more insecure and more like a target. Because of those

that feel

the need to put someone else down to feel good about themselves.

He spent

the last 5 years existing, not living. The Layne that died

wasn't the beam

of light he was to everyone that knew him. Although it was in

there

somewhere. Or the jokester that thought that farts were funny

and that would

laugh when Demri would geek out on a song or a commercial. He

didn't have a

home that was an open door to everyone like he did when he lived

on

Eastlake. The pad you could crash at after getting a little to

drunk at the

Off-Ramp or partying at the Son of Man house or El Steiner's.

Those were the

days he loved; a surprise birthday party at Naf's that Demri put

together

and his friends from War Babies, My Sister's Machine, Sweet

Water, Love on

Ice, etc. Playing, dressing up as a peasant girl for Halloween,

anything

chocolate, hanging out in the summer. It takes more than wanting

that back

for it to happen.



So they can say what they want, because the bottom line is it

doesn't matter

to those of us who knew and loved Layne and it certainly

wouldn't to Layne.

I doubt they matter to anyone in their lives and that's what's

really sad.

That they have to, like the drug addict harassers, latch on to

him in anyway

they can to feel like they got a piece of him and like they've

touched

greatness. What's even sadder is it's their loss because they

don't have a

person in their lives that would go to any lengths to put a

smile on their

face, do something for them, say nice things about them,

compliment them, or

make them feel good about themselves. Someone who would tell you

how much

value you had to him and to his life. All of us who knew him and

Demri could

go the rest of our lives as hermits with all the positivity they

passed on

to us because no one would be so lucky to get that in one

lifetime, let

alone from just 2 people.



I am glad he's not suffering anymore and I have no doubt Demri's

more than

happy to have him back. I am sure she's the Hostess with the

Mostest and has

made a home for everyone. With Andy, Shannon and Kurt who shared

her

birthday. With the recent death of one of her brothers, who died

in a car

crash last month. I'm positive, being the social butterfly she

is, everyone

in music is at their pad and they're just waiting for the rest

of us they

loved, and who loved them back, to arrive. Poor Layne has gone

back to being

the guy that everyone says, "Oh you're the guy that's Demri's

boyfriend";

with her being the celebrity in the family like it was when they

were first

dating.



Though I knew it would end this way, I refuse to forget the way

he was.



His name was Layne Elmer.

He liked wood shop and music.

He was a drummer first, then a singer.

He smoked some pot and popped cross tops.

He sang Metallica and Mercyful Fate covers in spandex and big

hair.



Even though he changed his last name, I always called him Elmer.

Even though he made it big, he always made time to visit with me

at shows.

Even though we didn't keep close contact, we always asked about

each others

families.

Even though he was famous, he acted like he wasn't.

Even though Layne Staley is a "God" or "Legend" to his fans, He

will always

be Layne Elmer to me.