I've Got Issues: How To Make Aquaman Work On The Big Screen

UPDATE: With Aquaman in the headlines recently thanks to director Zack Snyder coming to his defense and two writers being tapped for a potential solo movie, we thought it would be prudent to unearth this piece on how to make an Aquaman movie work. Hope those writers take notice!

As you may have heard, Jason Momoa has all but been confirmed as Aquaman in the upcoming Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice movie, and then presumably the upcoming Justice League movie, too. If you’re anything like me, this is like hearing Danny Trejo was cast as Spongebob. A tough actor known for playing supreme badasses cast as a character widely regarded as a joke. But after processing this news for a bit, casting Momoa as Aquaman is absolute genius.

This Dothraki doesn't fear the sea.

As I said, Aquaman is a joke to mainstream audiences. The kneejerk reaction to hearing his name is to make some lame joke about how he talks to fish or how he’s useless on land. The people who make those jokes aren’t lucky enough to have witnessed Aquaman commanding killer zombie sharks in Blackest Night, so go easy on them.

When Aquamans Attack

If you didn’t know, Momoa played Khal Drogo on Game of Thrones -- a brooding warrior king, undefeated in battle. He wore tribal paint and wielded sharp weapons and never put on a shirt. He was the epitome of danger and manliness. You wouldn’t want to cross the guy. No really -- the last guy who did got his tongue ripped out through his throat. This is how the public perceives Momoa. Yes, he was in Conan the Barbarian and Stargate: Atlantis (ha!), but it’s safe to say that most know him as the tough-as-nails Dothraki leader.

That’s why casting Momoa as Aquaman is genius -- he automatically makes Aquaman a badass. People will go into the movie thinking of Aquaman not of the blonde dude with fair skin and a bright orange scale-shirt, but a hardened warrior ready to slay with his golden trident. Audiences would be hard-pressed to call this Aquaman lame. Don’t make me tell the tongue story again!

It’s also worth mentioning that the Justice League isn’t exactly a great representation of diversity in comics. But those in charge of casting the Justice Leaguers have already done a great job. Henry Cavill and Ben Affleck are white, as expected for Superman and Batman, but Wonder Woman is being played by dark-featured Israeli beauty Gal Gadot, plus Cyborg is black actor Ray Fisher. With Momoa being a mix of (deep breath) Native Hawaiian, German, Irish, and Native American, WB’s Justice League will be the most diverse big-name superhero team movie to date. Just another reason that Momoa is an excellent choice.

But great casting only gets you so far. The story has to be just as good. Anyone who has read Aquaman’s most notable comics knows there’s a wealth of superb stories just waiting to be adapted. We are only supposed to get a cameo of Aquaman in BvS, but the movie makers will need a strong basis for his character that has the potential to set up a solo movie.

The best Aquaman stories are the ones with a hardcore edge. Don’t get me wrong, I have great love for the classic version in his orange and green glory, but I prefer an Aquaman who isn’t that pristine. I want an on-screen Aquaman who has seen some s***, man.

With Aquaman: Time and Tide, Peter David reimagined Aquaman as a brooding king with long hair, a full beard, no shirt, and -- after losing his hand -- a harpoon that would make Captain Hook jealous. Hmm -- sound familiar? This would be the perfect version of Aquaman for Momoa to portray. Make him conflicted between his home among humans on land and his underwater Atlantean legacy. Heavy is the head that wears the seashell crown, and all that.

Long hair, don't care.

While a solo Aquaman adventure wasn’t listed in the latest DC film schedule rumor, it’s easy enough to see him getting his own flick along with the rest of the Justice League members eventually. The way to go with Aquaman’s first movie would have to be Aquaman and the Others. Bear with me as I recap the awesomeness of that story.

Writer Geoff Johns invigorated Aquaman’s mythology in the New 52 with the idea that his trident is one of several golden Atlantean artifacts that each have a magic power. They do stuff like teleportation, future sight, and channeling the spirits of the dead. It turns out that back when he was a young man -- one more rage-fueled and hot-headed than the one we know today -- Aquaman joined up with a group where each member wielded one of the relics. There’s the Russian super-soldier Vostok-X, an army veteran called Prisoner-of-War, a super spy known as the Operative, a prophet named Kahina the Seer, and Ya'Wara, a woman of the jungle who has a pet panther and used to have a thing with Aquaman. Much of their story revolves around Aquaman’s rivalry with his archenemy Black Manta, who is hunting down the Others for their enchanted treasures.

Aquaman and the Others don't always get along.

I don’t know about you, but that would make one helluva movie. Action, adventure, magic, murder, panthers -- what more could you want? It’d be a balanced blend of real-world action, seafaring adventure, and ancient mythology. Imagine the Tomb Raider movies mixed with The Pirates of the Caribbean and a hint of Indiana Jones. All that, plus Jason Momoa? Suddenly an Aquaman movie can’t come quick enough.

Joshua is IGN’s Comics Editor. If Pokemon, Game of Thrones, or Green Lantern are frequently used words in your vocabulary, you’ll want to follow him on Twitter and IGN.