Last week Emily Letts talked to Cosmopolitan.com about her abortion video. Within 48 hours, the story had gone viral and Emily found herself in the middle of a media circus. She hasn't been back to work at Cherry Hill Women's Center, where she is an abortion counselor, because the task of responding to all the media attention — and criticism — has become her full-time job. Letts talks to Cosmo again to reflect on becoming an Internet sensation and to clear up a few misconceptions about her story.

Setting up the taping in the way that you did and choosing to talk to Cosmopolitan about it were very deliberate moves in terms of calling attention to the video. Still, the media reaction seems to have caught you by surprise.

It's crazy. The day the story came out, I was in a park with a friend having lunch. That night, I went home and looked at Cosmopolitan.com, and I was amazed at how fast the comments were coming in. I was also amazed by the different spectrum of the comments. The next day, the first request for an interview came. I thought, "That's weird. I said everything in that article." Then the second request, then the third. By the end of that day, I had a very profound feeling that this little article you and I did together was going to be something much more epic.

It is a story about filming your abortion. Of course there was going to be a debate. But what surprised you most about the reactions?

When it was just the video, it was just three minutes of a procedure. It was intended to be a little seed to grow a discussion — let everyone fill in the banks and think about it. The story in Cosmo made it about me as a person. Suddenly, I'm being judged by everyone.

Do you regret any of the interviews you've done since the story came out?

The way Dr. Drew asked me if I intended to get pregnant to make this video makes me want to throw up. One of the women on his panel said she's very pro-choice, but she doesn't support me because I didn't use birth control. I was like, "Wait, so because I made a mistake, I'm no longer a human being who deserves empathy, support, and kindness?" I wish I had asked her — and all the women on the panel — to raise their hands if they've ever had unprotected sex or if they've ever had an abortion or knew anyone who has.

What's been left out of the conversation this story has provoked?

It starts with shame. If we can talk about the shame and stigma, and call it what it is — forcing women to be quiet — if we can get women to tell their stories and start talking about it, maybe we create a culture where women who are sexually abused have the courage to come forward and say they need help. Maybe women who have an unintended pregnancy who don't have the money for an abortion out of state can still ask for help. Maybe we create a country that actually serves women, which is what we all want to do, but we're failing terribly at it.

I've had threats and curses put on my uterus for writing the story. I can only imagine the types of harassment you've been subjected to?

I am aware of the negative, but I'm kind of impervious to it, to be honest. People keep asking me if I feel unsafe, or they are worried about my emotional state. I am just so empowered and inspired by all the stories coming forward that it's hard for me to give a lot of weight to the negative.

What personal stories stand out most for you?

There have been so many. Women are blogging about their abortions for the first time. They are messaging me on Facebook and finding each other online and opening up to each other — it's been unbelievable. Just today I had this amazing conversation with a woman who was very poor when she got pregnant. The male involved was very negative. He and his whole family screamed at her every day of her pregnancy. She lost her job, he lost his job — just a stressful scenario. Everyone said she needed to have an abortion. She was so scared, and she wasn't allowed to enjoy her pregnancy at any moment. But she said when she closed her eyes at night, she knew she wanted to keep the baby. Even though that voice was so small and it had to fight through the shame and stigma and hardship, she did it. She wrote to me to express empathy for women who struggle with their decision to have an abortion. Whatever a woman's decision — no matter how hard it is — she has to be allowed to listen to that voice. And we need to listen to her.

During our last conversation, you talked about wanting to de-stigmatize abortion — to get the guilt out of it. Do you think that's an achievable goal?

Shame and guilt are a part of every woman's story. Being born with a uterus, you sign up for a world of stigma. A woman's too skinny. A woman's too voluptuous. We even have stigma about stay-at-home moms now. We are constantly in a small cage, and we just keep bumping up against everything because those walls are getting closer and closer.

Do you think you've changed anyone's mind about how they think about abortion?

I'm not trying to change anyone's mind. Women are targets on both pro-life and pro-choice sides. There is so much fighting over issues that it's become a war. It's drowning out the actual women I think everyone — on both sides — are trying to help. Even though I don't agree at all with shaming women as a means to help them, I think there is a common goal. But to reach that goal, we need to put down our pitchforks and our pom-poms, and we need to listen to each other. I think this whole thing is a beautiful lesson in empathy.

As an example, during my BBC interview, I was on a panel with five women, all of whom had abortions. Every one of them felt differently about it. One woman used to work at a clinic, and after her own traumatic abortion experience, she joined the pro-life movement. Some of the others said they regretted it too. So by no means did we all see eye to eye. But it was the most amazing conversation. All the women with regret had one thing in common: None of them had been given the chance to talk about their experience since they had the abortion. They have these wounds that have not healed. I made this video for this exact purpose. I may not have agreed with them, but there we were five strong, wonderful women talking about our experiences on international radio rather than being shamed into keeping quiet about them.

One of the main critiques about your video was your lack of guilt and even the moment of celebration at the end. Some interpreted that as making light of a very serious situation.

I want to clarify why I said "Yay" in the video. I did not feel attached to my pregnancy. Perhaps that was because it was so early. Perhaps because I had already made that decision for myself and I was following through. Because of that, I didn't feel a sense of loss afterward.

It was also relief and celebration. The procedure is uncomfortable. It's three to five minutes of a really intense contraction in your uterus. So when I said "Yay," I was relieved that I didn't have any physical discomfort anymore. And I was celebrating the fact that I was surrounded by love and support. I had access to safe reproductive care and that made me feel joyous.

Do you ever think about how different your situation would have been if you didn't have the luxury of that kind of supportive environment?

All the time. What if I couldn't afford it? What if I lived in Mississippi or Texas? It's not hard to envision a woman who doesn't have access to reproductive care these days. Mississippi has one clinic left. There are women who are mothers, who work two jobs, and in order to support their children, they need an abortion. These women are not crazy. They do not want to harm themselves. This is the story of women in America.

Does any part of you wish you hadn't filmed your abortion and shared it with the world?

Absolutely not. I don't regret anything about this. I believe in making mistakes, learning from them, growing, and moving forward. I wouldn't say this is a mistake at all. This is a beautiful, happy outcome of something that I did not expect, which was the pregnancy.

Has this experience changed your approach to your work?

It's made me realize one missing puzzle piece in the conversation. I don't get to talk to women a year or two after they've had an abortion. That's something that's so important. There are wonderful organizations out there, like ExhaleProVoice.org, which offer post-abortion emotional counseling. There are places to talk out there, and that's what women need — an objective, understanding ear not just when they're considering their decision, but after they've made it.

We were supposed to talk last week, but you took a break from media interviews because you felt overwhelmed. Do you think you'll stop talking to the press altogether?

I will welcome any conversation that comes my way. This is too important. It's such an honor that people want to hear what I have to say, which is absurd, but I see it as a gift. I hope to be having this conversation for the rest of my life.

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Photo credit: Courtesy of Emily Letts

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