It was a shuck-off. Go ahead, make a joke. We did. (Try yelling "Shuck-off" to a co-worker and see if they yell back "Same to you.")
But this wasn't a joke to the folks at Hieronymus Seafood. It was a semi-serious event pitting the best oyster shuckers from area restaurants against each other.
They came from Heck of a Peck, Elijah's, Bluewater Grill, Mako's and Dock Street Oyster Bar, as well as the home-team restaurant, to compete for a $100 first prize, a trophy and, of course, braggin' rights.
"To me, it's not about the money or the fame," said Casey Clary, 22, one of the contestants. "It's about making Heck of a Peck the best shucking restaurant."
Last week, he and the five other men met at a cement-floored, back-room oyster bar to drink beer, talk smack, and crack open some bivalves.
They were joined by the judges, who were representatives from radio stations WSFM Surf 107, WBNE 93.7 The Bone and Encore magazine, as well as "Uncle Henry: The Secret Weapon" (I think he was an organizer's relative) for Hieronymous's first shuck-off.
Each contestant was asked to select his own oysters - two dozen plus six extra, just in case - from the supply provided by Hieronymus. They would then shuck as fast as possible, while not mangling the oyster.
To prepare, one contestant had a drinking strategy. He sat there with a shot of Jagermeister, a pumpkin ale and a Bud Light in front of him. Others simply inspected their equipment.
Mr. Clary came prepared with his own glove. "Where I work, you have to have a glove," he said. It was clear from his tone that he thought non-glove establishments just weren't up to par.
He also came with his own oyster knife. He wasn't in favor of some of the others he saw lying around, ones with wooden handles.
His handle was blue plastic with a hand guard, to protect his flesh from the rocky shell of the oyster. He described it as a modern-day sword.
Daniel Bifalco, 21, of Elijah's also came with his own oyster knives, one to use and one as an accessory, tucked under his cap.
Other than that, he didn't have a game plan.
"I'm just going to shuck," he said.
And shuck they did, in two heats of three. Some, such as Britt McCrimmon, 23 of Blue Water Grill, worked on all of the hinges, before they started to pry the shells apart. Some shucked and then dunked the oysters in water to clear away whatever dirt was on the shell before placing them on the tray that would be presented to the judges. Both Mr. Clary and Mr. Bifalco, as well as some of the other shuckers, laid out the oysters in neat, orderly rows before they freed them from their shells, one by one.
Even after there was a winner of each heat, the other shuckers kept shucking. That's because the judges added on five seconds to each unacceptable oyster.
Those tough inspectors would turn them upside down, and for every oyster that dangled, still connected to the shell by a membrane, those seconds would be added to the shuckers' time. A time of seven minutes and 54 seconds would turn into eight minutes and nine seconds.
Finally, the winners of the two heats, Mr. Clary and Mr. Bifalco, met to determine the winner. Just a dozen more to shuck to see would get the trophy and who would walk away in second place, with a $50 gift certificate.
It was close, even after the judges were wiggling the last of the oysters. But the mother of all shuckers, this year anyway, was Mr. Bifalco.
"This is for all the bus boys in Wilmington," he said as he accepted his trophy.
He and Mr. Clary didn't have any hard, crusty feelings about the contest. After it was over the shuckers sat at the bar, spent their winnings on food and booze and discussed oyster geography. The oysters they shucked that night, they said, came from Texas. North Carolina waters are too warm right now to produce the good, salty ones locals love.
They also gave some advice on how to shuck an oyster. But, by this time, the beers were working. And, well, they kept referring to the oysters as "she."
But what else would you expect from a shuck-off?
Allison Ballard: 343-2376
allison.ballard@starnewsonline.com
"The first rule of shucking is that you don't want to cut yourself," said Casey Clary. Getting blood in your oysters isn't good. "The second rule is make people laugh and want to be here," he said. Oysters are good for social engagements. Have fun with them. "Pretend like there's always someone watching. There are scouts everywhere." And if an oyster scout spots you and likes your stuff, what then? "That's what I'm saying, you never know." For some serious advice he said, "Don't attempt to shuck if you're under the influence." If you need help knowing exactly what to do with an oyster once you have one, Daniel Bifalco suggests finding the hinge at the back of the shell. Insert knife. "Then you just twist and pop it off," he said.
Shuck like a pro