We've all heard stories about Japanese trains, such as about the white-gloved attendants who push passengers into crowded rush-hour trains in Tokyo, tales of lost property returned, or even the occasional gripe about women who put on their make-up or men who use electric shavers while riding to work. Or maybe you've heard about how often Japanese people sleep on trains.
Two train otaku once pointed out to me that while the bullet train, including the new Evangelion shinkansen, should be a highlight of every person's trip to Japan, it's by riding the regional trains that you get to experience the local color. You're much more likely to get up close and personal with the Japanese people on a commuter train or a country railway that winds through country towns. So, let's start with a story that takes place on a local line in the mountains of Hokkaido.
▼ Talk about missing your train!
It's certainly not unusual for drunk men to hurl vomit onto the tracks while waiting for the train. and we've all heard of the unfortunate drunk who has staggered along the platform and fallen off, only to be hit by a train pulling in. And these are just things that happen outside of the train, so you can imagine what happens when the drunks make it inside.
Turns out that the Chuo line is ripe for local color.
▼ That didn't really just happen to me, did it?
▼ Well, at least it wasn't a hair dryer.
There aren't many stabbings on Japan's trains but that doesn't mean there isn't a decapitation or a body halved every now and then, as this poor passenger found out.
Um, excuse me sir, but did you know there's a bird on your tongue?
The thing about the train is that it's the only time of day you're going to sit down with a complete stranger and be stuck with them for minutes, even hours, on end. It's no wonder people give each other a good gander before committing to an empty seat, especially on those four-seaters where two people sit across from two other people. And since no humorous article would be complete without a nun story, we end with this pithy anecdote.
But of course, she must have been horrified.
What's the worst thing that has ever happened to you on a Japanese train? Do tell!