An interesting thing happened over the weekend. Someone from the company I work for passed away on Friday. Nothing too unexpected; after all, he was getting up there in years. So on Friday afternoon, people either went to the hospital or made plans to attend the wake or the funeral. Amidst of it all, I heard that one of my former co-workers and an old friend of the diseased made plans to go on a flight over the weekend in order to make it on time for the funeral. He lives in the US.
The last time I saw the diseased was over two years ago. He was a big man in the company. Many years before, he was usually driven around and led by helpers, and even accompanied by company lackeys. But the time I saw him, he was not surrounded by helpers and no one was opening any doors for him. Any clout he had within the company, he seems to have relinquished at the time. If I didn't recognize him, I would've confused him for any other old man wandering the streets of Seoul. In any case, I imagine with things being the way they are, with his old friend living in the US for so many years now, I'm guessing there was not much correspondence between the two. I was the one who initiated telling him about his friend passing. I'm not sure if they've heard about each other in the years before.
And so what have I learned? I learned about a special type of relationship, a new category of person whom I find it hard to pinpoint exactly which one of my few friends belongs to. Not a friend who you'll talk to, do favors for, or keep in touch with now and then. This friend does not care how deep a depth you swim to or on what slow hell you are killing yourself with at the moment. None of it matters to this friend. It is most grim, and I'm not passing judgment on whether it is good or not, but ultimately this friend is quite the intimate sort of acquaintance. This friend will be there for you only when you finally die. This is the friend that will only reunite with you when there's not much left of you to be reunited with.
Again, I don't think this is good or bad. I think it is intimate, peculiar, and not necessarily unique, especially when it comes to relatives. How many of us only see our distant relatives only when they finally pass? But I think it really is more special when it comes to non-blood acquaintances, particularly because there's no familial pressure pushing one to be there for the wake or the funeral. "I haven't seen him forever, but I have to be there for the funeral." Who is this for exactly? For the diseased? For the visitor? Or the relationship that's now expired? What's funny is, when I start thinking about the people in my life, auditing my relationships and choosing which people I'll probably never see again but who'll likely be there at my lightly-attended funeral. It's a rather sad, interesting, and honest exercise.
2016 was not the most horrible of years, but it was one I'm not that very happy with. There are many celebrities who have died, but that's all part of life, and I'm sure all years have their share of wonderful people dying that year. Personally, I happen to like Scott Weiland, but I can't really blame 2016 for his death. There are disappointments over politics, but I believe the worst that the Trump election could be is still yet to come. He's still a person with his own will and conscience. He can make the next four years good or as bad as people fear he would.
I haven't done too many art shows this year, but that's a mixture of luck, with not many art shows coming my way, and with me not being as aggressive with my work. Work-wise, not much has changed. But I'm content where I am. I'm just glad I'm not struggling as many people are. And as for personal matters, I only have myself to blame for any failings last year.
I met a couple of scumbags last year too. Boy, were they scumbags!
As for good things, two nieces were born last year. My sister as well as my sister-in-law both had daughters. It's good to see their families grow. My sisters are making sure their lives in North America are turning into a particular Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young song. My good friend, Alicia, visited me last year. We went to Japan with her and her boyfriend. It wasn't without its bumps, but it was good to see one of my oldest friends. I happened to save someone who fell on the subway station while they were here too. I guess that's something.
I also found one of the best beaches to go to last year.
Here's hoping that 2017 would be better. So far, with Canada losing to the US in the Junior Hockey championship game yesterday, it's not off to a good start. But perhaps that's just an early glitch.